Going to bed problem with 22 month old

[J & J's Mum]

Hi,

We have lots of issues with our DD at the moment who is 22 months, but the biggy is something I really need some advice on.

When she goes to bed for her nap, or her night time sleep she screams and screams.  She's in a big bed now (well a toddler bed) and the first few weeks went really well, but she will not sleep unless one of us stays in the room with her and then I have to crawl out the room backwards because my joints click if I walk!!!!  You should see me!!!!  Anyway, I know it's not ideal to stay with her, but I've tried leaving her and she gets in to such a state.

She doesn't have a bedtime routine as such.  At the moment it's bath, pjs, milk and then straight to bed at 7.30.  I've tried reading a book to her in bed, but she will not lie down, she wants to sit up and then it seems to wake her up more!!  She has a low night light in her room.  As soon as she knows it's bedtime she'll start crying and screaming.

She goes to daycare 2 times a week where she will nap no problems at all.  Apparantly one of the child care assistants stay in the room until they are asleep, I'm not sure if this is what happens everywhere, but maybe this has caused the problem?

This is what her day looks like:

5.50 - 6.30 wake and then bottle of milk (I cannot shift this at the moment! - another issue!!)
7-7.30 breakfast with her big brother
11.30-11.45 lunch
12.00 nap for 1 1/2 hours
5.00 dinner
6.30 bath
7.30 bed

Please help!!

Rachel x

[beckles]

I have no advice, but I just wanted to say that I have just posted about the exact same thing with my LO who is 15mths.

Big hugs and I will watch this closely!!

[Colin Macs Mom]

bumping for you

[deckchariot]

{{{{hugs}}}}  Have you tried moving both the nap and bedtime a wee bit earlier?  I'm wondering if the A time is too long and she's a bit OT?

The fact that she doesn't do it at daycare and someone stays with her the whole time makes me think it's a prop issue though.  Have you thought about doing gradual withdrawal?  You'd start by staying in her room til she falls asleep, and yep, doing the crazy crawl out.  When you stay, do you stay right next to her bed?  If so, then with GW, you'd gradually (every few days) move farther away from her bed, but you'd still stay til she falls asleep.  Eventually, you'll be outside the door and then it turns into more of wi/wo.  It can be helpful to have a phrase you use as she's going to sleep - if she gets agitated "it's ok, it's just time to sleep" and repeat that - keep the interaction as minimal as possible.  It's not quick, but it does work.

[J & J's Mum]

Thanks guys