encouraging 14 mo to self-feed

[mini_egg282]

My lo is 14 months old and from about 6 - 12 months we had a lot of difficulty (on and off) trying to feed him. We finally figured out that certain foods were bothering his tummy and now that we're avoiding them he can handle a decent sized meal. He was underweight for a while and is finally gaining again (85th percentile, down to 20th, back up to 25-30th now). The problem is that we've gotten into the bad habit of distracting him when he's eating, and give him toys to play with at meal time, and now he's not very interested in feeding himself. He fusses unless he has something interesting to focus on.

He will feed himself pears, blueberries and cheerios no problem, but anything else he just plays with or takes one bite and throws on the floor. I've been trying to make his purees more chunky and want him to get away from purees altogether, but he won't eat nearly as much if it's not smooth. I recently tricked him into eating scrambled eggs by mashing them up with some avocado, but he won't touch them on their own!

I don't want to reduce the calories he's taking in, but at the same time I want to encourage him to eat "real" food and feed himself. Is it too early to push this? I have baby #2 on the way any day so the time I have to dedicate to feeding the older one is going to be limited soon!

Any suggestions?

[Mom to M&M]

My DD (now almost 5 and a GREAT eater) was like that. Bad reflux/digestive issues and unable to handle texture for a long time. She was mostly on purees at 14 months as well but by working slowly on things we were able to have her eating a good variety of "real" foods by 2 years old. I don't think the scrambled egg thing is "tricking" - the avocados are super healthy and make his eggs taste better. I add spinach and cheese to my DS' omelets!

If it were me, I'd take away the toys and distractions. Will he feed himself stuff like blueberries and pears while you feed him other foods? Often my DS will feed himself fruit and happily let me feed him bites of chicken, spoonfuls of soup, etc in between. I always tell him what I'm feeding him too. Instead of toys I give him (and did with DD) food items - like an extra spoon or cup to play/practice with, and I sing songs, etc to make it fun.

What foods do you need to avoid?

I know what you are saying with wanting him to feed himself, but TBH, some LOs don't do so good with that (my DD was one of them) until they master using utensils themselves - some don't like the way the food feels on their fingers I guess. Maybe buy some safe toddler forks for him to practice with - stab bites of safe foods and leave them on his tray at mealtimes?

I wouldn't worry about the timing issue with #2 on the way - these things have a way of working themselves out - if needed you can have the new baby in a bouncy seat or sling while you are feeding DS.

[mini_egg282]

Thanks for the encouragement and suggestions! I've been trying to stick to distractions like spoons and bowls but he gets bored of them after a couple of meals. Maybe I need a wider variety of bowls and spoons and even some plastic forks. I don't mind him playing with these things at all.

We suspect he has celiac disease, so we need to avoid anything with gluten. We've found good substitutes for things like bread and pasta but we have to be really careful about cross contamination.

He is very skilled at only opening his mouth long enough to get his finger foods in, so it's really difficult to spoon feed him while he's feeding himself. We have to limit the number of pieces we put on his tray when it's his favorites, because he just won't stop filling his mouth otherwise!

I've decided to stick to purees for 2/3's of the meal, and just offer one item in chunks and another in finger foods. That way if he doesn't eat them he has still had a good meal. I'm only going to stress us both out if I push it too hard. On a positive note he's getting pretty good with his sippy cup, so at least he's able to feed himself some milk