Baby Lead Weaning Support Thread - Part 7

[Meditrina]

Amy~ From what I read of your post your MIL is worried that lo will inhale food (as in breathe it in instead of swallow and cause pneumonia etc?)  I just wanted to say that imho it would be a lot easier for a lo to inhale a puree deep enough into their lungs to cause this type of issue.  And really the only thing that could not cause this problem would be water.  I am also a nurse (not that that makes mu opinion any better then anyone elses) and I think that BLW is a very natural way for los to learn how to eat.  For what it is worth, their are conflicting opinions about everything in medicine and babies, so it could be argued either way depending on your priorities.  And if I am wronf about the inhaling, sorry about this little rant!! 

Also from a fighting mommy angle, I had to fight DH and MIL about BLW with DD (even tho I did it with DS, apparently their memories are not that good!) Neither were comfortable with it and felt I was putting her in danger (okay, going blue after choking on banana may have caused this concern!  ) But in reality, I feed her everyday and to be honest, my way goes.  I mean, she is my child, I would have to deal with it if she did choke (which was also made blatently obvious when she did and they all stood around staring at her), and I accept that responsibility.  And your lo has been doing blw for 4 weeks and they are concerned now?  I think if it is what you want to do, stick with it.  DOnt get me wrong, I respect DH and MIL opinions, but am with Martina about this

Afterall, I'll bet you're the only one whose read about this stuff.  I have told my DH that until he reads up on any aspect of parenting, he can't judge how I would like to do things.  ...  Listen, this is your child's eating habits we're talking about, don't settle for mush if you don't think it's what's best for him.

Good luck with your decision!

[Meditrina]

Oh and if I here "She's choking, She's choking!" one more time when this little girl gags I am going to scream!!

[timmysmommy]

Thanks for the support ladies!  I am VERY upset about all of this.  I knew MIL wouldn't like it.  I was hoping by the time we saw her he would be a little older.  Dh had basically told me it made him nervous, but to do what I wanted.  I thought that after a month of blw that dh was now confident that it is safe.  Unfortunately it came out today that he is still nervous every time T eats.  I am so afraid that if something were to happen, they would all be thinking "I knew it wasn't a good idea". I tried to explain to mil that his foods are soft enough to gum, and he is just as likely to choke on purée.  Imam not going to change her mind.  I think I will probably wind up doing a combo of both.  Ds is pretty good with a spoon now, so I'll just preload and hand it to him.  Gtg. It has been a stressful day.

[bug_blues70]

Hugs Amy!!

Cute, Eloise!!

[Meditrina]

More hugs Amy!

[timmysmommy]

Thanks everyone!!  Meditrina- I do feel better hearing that from you since there is little medical advice pro blw(due to law suits of course).  I tried to reason with mil about choking and inhaling foods to no avail.  She watched Timmy easily eat 2 meals before she spoke up.  Dh basically said from the start that it makes him nevous, but I'm the one who feeds him so to do what I want.  I was hoping for his support now that he has seen it. Oh well.  It was really comical watching mil try to feed DS at breakfast with a spoon.  He kept trying to grab it from her.  She wouldn't even let him get the spoon because "he is too small for it".  Finally dh took the spoon and gave it to Timmy and he fed himself.  I am done ranting!  Thanks for listening!!

[bug_blues70]

Wow, that's amazing that he's feeding himself with a spoon!! Do you have to load it for him?

[~inbalance~]

(((hugs))) Amy!  It's ok to do both, I did both with T.  At the end of the day you have to do what you feel suits you both.  But don't NOT do BLW simply for the reason that MIL doesn't like it.  There are so many other factors.  YOU are the expert here.  Good luck. 

[~Sarah~]

Amy I am so sorry it has to be this way for you.  People should learn that parenting is personal, so butt out.  Have you taken a parent CPR class?  They teach you how to help a choking baby..not that I think it would happen, in fact I am most certain it won't..but then you could explain that you would feel comfortable in case a problem arose.  I too am in healthcare and have about 16yrs working with very sick kids, and I feel absolutely positive this is not only a "good idea" but a Great Idea!!  I also know from first hand experience that "seasoned" nurses frequently think they know everything, when in fact they just have opinions based on nothing but their lazziness to NOT become better informed. Sorry for the soapbox

Here is what I do with MIL...she know better than to question me though...I give her purees or soup/stew to feed El if and when she has to.  It makes her more comfortable and honestly she would freak out if El even gagged.  MIL is a nervous Nelly to say the least, it would stress her out to the MAX.  El will eat anything, but MIL reports she makes a face like "what the heck are you giving me"

HTH

Big Big hugs from us

[EloysH]

Hey Amy,

 replied in the both clubs thread about your MIL.  Just dropping off some hugs and a big SIGH.

[*Ali*]

Megan. I heard a stomach is the size of the fist so if Ellen is eating food roughly the size of her fist that would fill her tummy right up.
Glad your Lo likes the lamb Eloise.
Amy, why don't you just do BLW when MIL isn't around? She's not there all the time is she? Like someone else said even non-BLW'ed babies have finger foods from 7mo so he should be having them by now even if he weren't on BLW. We don't do purees now but do have cereals like porridge so it is possible for your Lo to get the hang of finger foods even if he is spoon-fed too. I know that isn't BLW though.
I have started being able to give Cadan a bowl of food (cut up strawberries yesterday) and he will put them in his mouth one by one. I do have to watch he doesn't sling the bowl over the side of the high chair tray.

[timmysmommy]

Thanks ladies!  All our family lives far away.  This means when we visit, we are staying with them and vise versa.  I knew mil would freak, but I thought dh would explain how well it is going.  Turns out dh is nervous too.  I am not comfortable doing blw without his support.  So we are going to do a variation on blw.  I am feeding ds foods that dh is comfortable with- potatoes, bananas, and other mushy food.  We will purée the others for a little while.  Dh volunteered to make the purees and I'm going to take him up on it.  I was already feeding ds rice cereal/oatmeal once a day by preloading a spoon for him( I had bought it prior to discovering blw).  I hope you will still allow me to post on this board!  On the plus side, dh likes how ds feeds himself with the spoon.  We are visiting my sil right now and my neice who is 2 weeks older than ds is spoonfed.  She refuses food, and it gets shoved in whenever she smiles or "talks".  Dh really could see a huge difference in the two kids' attitudes toward mealtime.  Ds LOVES to eat, and will eat anything, and is very happy at mealtime.  Could just be his personality, but there is no way I could go to spoon-feeding now. I can handle preloading for him, but I can't imagine trying to jam a spoon into his pursed lips

[~Sarah~]

Of course you can stick around    This is all going to be just fine.  Let it blow over some...let DH puree to his hearts content.  As long as your LO is getting the experience of choosing when to eat and not being force fed I think you are in the plus column.  Your LO is basically at the age to start giving finger foods anyhow, so you will be back to where you were in a very short time frame good luck!!

[Mrs Coops]

Hey Amy definitely stick around here. I'm quite sure your LO will soon refuse purée. Plus I reckon you could do BLW on the sidelines, I'm sure there are plenty of times when you are feeding him on your own? Perfect opportunity to carry on whilst pleasing the nervous around you  

J is officially the messiest muncher about! Where S used to spread it all over her face he just sucks and spits it all down himself! There is plenty of evidence he's eating some too, he's getting used to it.

[Meditrina]

Amy~ Hugs and agree that you will prob be back to where you are now soon anyways    Maybe you can "teach" your SIL the preloaded spoon technique and your neice could enjoy more of her meal time too!