18 month sleep regression support thread

[*Kara*]

ugh - I think we are in the 18 month regression   She had a cold last week and now that she is better, sleep is not getting any better! 

This was us:
Wake 620am
Nap 1230-230pm capped
BT 730pm and STTN

Now we are stuck here:
Wake 520/530am (ACK!)
Nap 12-2/230pm  - I let her have a touch longer as her nights are shorter now
BT 7/730pm

We simply cannot get out of this loop yet she really isn't showing any signs that she would prefer more sleep... We have even had a few days of ruined naps (milk trial failure - tummy pains woke her)... yesterday she was up at 540am, napped 1230-130pm, refused any CN.. was asleep at 658pm.  I expected that she would tack on a bit as she generally does, but nope, singing with the birds at 525am  Happy as Larry.  She was fine all morning, not cranky at all... down for a nap at noon easily in hopes of catching her up.

Please tell me this will end.  Tired Momma!

[clairebear79]

(((hugs))) Kara.  Yes it will end but I'll not lie its a rough old ride getting through it!  We had almost 2 months of on/off EW & I started nap capping here & there (which is very difficult when they have erratic WU's!)  & then it suddenly stopped & settled down. What we have now found, is that he is faring much better with a later nap at 1pm (6hrs A).  He is still having a longer nap of 1h 45.  We did have to push BT back a wee bit though (to 8pm), keeping him at 5hrs A in order for him to be tired enough to go to sleep.  He has been waking at 7.15am (until 3 days ago & we now need to cap the nap again!).  It seems that the longer morning a) breaks the early waking cycle & b) makes him more tired at bedtime, even though his A time to BT is still only 5hrs, so the BT antics & EW were gone. 

So....my advice to you would be: if you can, ride it out.  Try & keep her nap capped at 2hrs or I think you will encourage the cycle to continue.  And possibly consider pushing the nap a wee bit later towards a 1pm start (maybe 15mins at a time)

[ZacsMumme]

Hugs Kara, agree with Claire. Do your best to be consistent. We are back to our pre regression routine! Still have bad days but they tend to be obviously teeth, not SA, developmental and EW/nap refusals etc. During the regression our nap went back by 15 mins and luckily we only had NW, no Refusals or EW so with these we just APOPed and WI/WO through them.

I would also keep her nap capped at 2 hrs, maybe 2hrs15 at the max if you really feel bad waking her. 2 hrs is a solid nap, and it will help prevent the EW getting out of control

[*Kara*]

Well, I let my momma heart take over today and let her have a mega nap to catch up... she woke after 3 hrs 10 mins but oh man, did she really need it.  She was in such a far better mood than she has been for a week or more!  And, it did let me push BT to 8pm... she is having a bit of a time settling to sleep though.. no sounds, just faffing about up there intermixed with stretches of quiet time... it's been about 20 mins now and I think she is finally settled to sleep! 

Now, if only this helps push our wake up later tomorrow... then I can start to push her nap a bit later!

[*Kara*]

So, the big plan of pushing BT to 8pm after that monster nap backfired as I had expected   She was restless until 830pm and was up at 530am.  Ugh. 

It's not getting any better so I am really not sure where to start?  I can't get a later WU to start pushing her nap!  She napped 12-215pm and woke on her own yesterday... but she was up at 530am for the day.  She was happy as larry until BT.  She went down easily at 730 but was up at 510am today!  GROSS!  Clearly is OT now.

I am totally known as the harda$$ with naps but I just could not push her today... she was shattered all morning... begged for ba-ba and ni-night while banging on her baby gate at the bottom of the stairs (her room is upstairs) at 950am.  I took one look at her and obliged her request - her eyes were totally red-rimmed!  Pink little eyebrows too!

I think we are just gonna have to wing it to get this OT under control...

Part of me thinks she is chilly in the early morning and it wakes her up.. but it's sooo hot at bedtime that a sleeper is almost too much, let alone a blanket/sleepsack.  She doesn't understand blankets either as she has never really had one - just a sleepsack!  UGh.

[lily528]

If you suspect her being chilly in the early morning maybe do the sleep sack but put an oscillating fan on on low at BT to keep her cool but  it off when you go to bed so she isn't chilly in the a.m.?

Sorry to hear you're having a tough time. My little girl slept 8-8:30 and refused a nap today. 3rd nap refusal in a little over a week. Her WU times were different for all 3 so I have no idea what's going on. I hope things get better

[*Kara*]

If you suspect her being chilly in the early morning maybe do the sleep sack but put an oscillating fan on on low at BT to keep her cool but poo* it off when you go to bed so she isn't chilly in the a.m.?

I did consider that but it is so warm that she is sweaty in just her sleeper... I stopped the sleepsack a week ago because she wasn't settling at all until 9/10pm   I am thinking that I might try sneaking into her room and putting a light blanket on her around 3/4am though...

[clairebear79]

Oh bless her Kara.  I totally feel your pain & know just how hard it is to get anywhere when there is EW involved.  I too have always found that monster naps backfire b/c he would just end up UT at BT & do a super short night.  

TBH I think the best thing you could possibly do right now in order to minimise OT whilst still trying to push the day on is to put her down at say 11.30am, so her morning is no longer than 6hrs.  Then cap her nap at 2hrs, absolutely no more or you will get a shorter night through her being UT at BT.  You don't want to push her BT though or you will cause OT from her day being too long IYSWIM?  I would do this for a few days & then gradually push nap (and BT) later by 15mins at a time, perhaps every 3-5 days if she'll cope with it, or every week if she cant, and keep going until her nap starts at 12.30pm & is capped at 2hrs max, BT 5hrs later at 7.30pm.  If you still get BT resistance &/or EW once you are there then I would try pushing the nap a wee bit later still, towards 1pm & you might then find she starts getting up a bit later.  (((hugs))) hun as doing that is tough (BTDT) but I think it really will help.xx

(((hugs))) Melissa.  So she woke at 8.30am & then refused her nap at what time?  Did you try putting her down later?  I really think hun that if she is sleeping nights as long as that she might well be saying 'I don't need a nap today Mummy, I already had 12.5hrs sleep' IYSWIM?  Oliver is getting that amount of sleep in 24hrs too, but that is split between nap & BT (1.5hrs nap, 11hr night) so that's pretty good going really.  Just keep on offering & she may go back to napping in a couple of weeks time.xx

ETA: meant to say if capping nap at 2hrs, do BT 5hrs later no more.

[ZacsMumme]

I think we are just gonna have to wing it to get this OT under control...

I did a combo of winging it and trying to be consistant. If I had 2-3 days where I found naps were taking over nights more so than usual I just capped the nap, earlier BT and Xed my fingers. This usually gave us a longer night. That said we didnt really get EW here (but we are getting them now!) we had NW instead and SA style screaming

 

Sorry to hear you're having a tough time. My little girl slept 8-8:30 and refused a nap today. 3rd nap refusal in a little over a week. Her WU times were different for all 3 so I have no idea what's going on. I hope things get better

So many hugs, I have a friend IRL whose boy is doing this, its hard

[*Kara*]

I was thinking exactly that Claire... I have tried the AM CN route with no joy... just a PM nap refusal

Maybe something like this:

WU 530am
Nap 1130-130
BT 645/7pm?

Do that for a few days then start the push of the day 15 mins at time?  I could likely do every 3 days as she does cope well with A time pushes and I rarely get OT naps from her (thankfully!)

Sara - ick.  Luckily we don't get NWing too much... teething is really the only thing that does it here.  And SA style screaming is always a great time   We haven't had that for a couple of months now... but I wouldn't be surprised if it starts again with the OT.

[lily528]

Thanks I did her nap at 1:15 tried til 2:20 and quit. Guess I'll do early bed? Sigh think I need to wake her in the a.m. To shorten her night?  I can't see putting her down later to bed 8 is late enough for all of us lol. The 2nd no map day she woke at 7:30 though!  Ugh I think I will maybe try for 8-7:30 nights and see if she takes her nap more consistently. It really IS a lot to ask for a nap after that long of a night

[clairebear79]

Kara - I just edited my last post.  When I said don't push BT too far or she'll get OT, I meant to add that I've always done no more than 5hrs A to BT & that's always worked really well for us.  That said, it was around the 18 month mark when he actually started to get UT with that.  So....I'd probably see how she manages, PD at 6.30pm if she struggles, or nearer to 7pm if she is ok but no later.  Then like you say, you can push the nap & BT later again at the same time.

Melissa.  If she woke at 8.30am & you tried for her nap at 1.15-2.20 then I would say that without a doubt she wasn't tired enough.  Oliver is doing close to 11hr nights usually & he can last 6hrs before his nap.  So, your choice is to go with it, skip the nap if she doesn't want it & enjoy the lovely long nights, and she will nap as & when she needs it, or, you do like you say & wake her a little earlier so she is having a consistent length night & then she may be more likely to take the nap.  I do think you'll need to aim nearer to 6hrs A though if you want her napping, so you could perhaps do 7.30am WU, 1.30pm nap for say 1.5hrs & 8pm BT?  That would be a decent length day of 12.5hrs - what do you think???

If it makes you feel any better, Oliver had an 11.5hr night last night as we've had almost a week of earlier WU's & so we've cut his nap to 1.5hrs.  Anyway, he was at nursery, & they put him down at his usual 6hrs A & he didn't settle for 30mins, & only slept 1hr, woke happy!  So I am thinking when his night is over 11hrs, he isn't even tired after 6hrs.  So its not all plain sailing here either!  xx

[*Kara*]

So, weird things going on here :/  I think she is about to cut her first canine (with the second one close behind!)  I can see the white tip of it and it's not too far from the edge of her gums... she must be having poor restless night sleep and then waking early from OT/pain combo!  Poor baby!  She barely made it from 510am to 1005am... she was sobbing for a nap at 945.  So I got her bottle and carted her off to her room, she passed out cold and I fully expected to have a messy afternoon when she woke around noon on her own... well - I had trouble waking her at 1pm!  Typically, I just open her door and she sits up... not today... I actually spoke to her and stroked her arm without so much as a flinch from her!  I spoke to her again and she just moved further away from my voice and closed her eyes again!

I was about to just leave her as she clearly needed to sleep but she finally sat up and uttered a very pitiful "momma?" 

About 5 mins after we got to the living room, she signed for teething gel - they must be really bothering her

Had planned for a 7pm BT but she was OT and took a touch longer than usual to settle, it was 710pm.

With any luck, that nap has helped curb that OT and she will have a decent night of at least 10.5 hrs!

[lily528]

so you could perhaps do 7.30am WU, 1.30pm nap for say 1.5hrs & 8pm BT?  That would be a decent length day of 12.5hrs - what do you think???

we tried for ebt last night at 7...since she had no nap and had been up since 8:30...she then claimed she had to go pee pee ..so we went to the potty but she just played...finally got her in the crib by 7:30...wasn't asleep til like 8:20 (OT by that point I'd think)  She woke on her own at 7:15 this morning and was out like a light at 12:50...she usually will take a few mins to settle so I put her down around 12:50 but she went right out...it's 2:25 and she is still sleeping so I guess today was a success..we'll see what happens

[*Kara*]

That's looking better Melissa!

Wish I could say the same.  :/  We were up for the day at 515am (10hr 5 min night).  Not bad considering she had a wickedly long nap of 3 hrs 10 mins that I struggled to wake her from... She passed out in the car for about 5 mins at 945am and then refused a PM nap when I tried at 1230pm.. then again at 1pm... loaded her into the car at 130 and she was out cold at 145pm... slept until 245pm.  Shot for EBT with sleep at 645pm.  She struggled to sleep and wouldn't let me AP her (normally she is fine to be rocked until drowsy when OT)... finally asleep at 710pm.  Good part: she is paci free!  I only gave her one and she tossed it but went to sleep anyways... it's been over an hour and nothing from her.