Im getting very desperate!! near 20 mnths & we are still having the same issues!

[*Jo*]

well yesterday he did an hour nap and i think it was only a 5 hour A time, but the problem is that because the A time is shorter and the nap is still not really long enough it leaves a huge time till bedtime, like 7 hours! and thats just to get him to 6/6.30pm bedtime.

I just dont know what to do, I think Ive tried just about everything

[babybarr]

I know what you mean... it's hard isn't it.  I wonder if you should just stick with a 7pm bedtime regardless and see what happens

I mean our bedtime typically is between 6.30pm and 7pm anyway due to having to be up early but even with a short nap we never do bed before 6.30pm (very often anyway) but then again maybe my DS really is not a great example given everything he gets up to in the night

[*Jo*]

well heres something interesting, DH took Caleb out at 2.30pm, so an hour after hed woken up and he said Caleb fell asleep in the car! it was only for 5 mins but he never does this in teh afternoon, we usually reserve going out till after the nap because we know he wont fall asleep. So this is telling me, im sure, that hes not getting enough sleep, for him to fall asleep only an hour later in the car (and it was only a 15min drive).

I made bedtime 7pm still, but what do you think about that?

DH thinks hes doing ok if hes not having NW and I shouldnt worry about it, but i just cant help but wonder how long before he crashes

[*Becky*]

Jo,
This happens to us as well but for us it is def teeth. 2 days ago Henry woke at 7am and when I took him in the car at 9.30am he was yawning constantly!
They do sound quite similar our boys in that nights are generally good but naps not. I do a 12/12.30pm nap and regardless of nap length a 7pm bedtime but 7.30pm if he does a good nap. He still STTN.
I agree that the danger of bringing the nap forward too much with a short napper is that it leaves a long A time to bed. I just ended up thinking that 12pm ish is a reasonable time for a nap i.e. it is the middle of the day so there is rest offered then and if he does not take a good nap then we keep it fairly low key until bedtime. Not sure what else you can do?

[*Jo*]

Yeah, I think you are right I will keep offering the nap at 12/12.30 and bed at 7/7.30pm
He's going to a friends house on Tuesday as we will be moving house. I know he won't take a nap there because he's never slept anywhere else before and if we try he just refuses plus there are two other kids there to play with so he will be too excited to want to sleep. That plus the room he will be sleeping in is really light. What should I do? Tell my friend how to do Wi/wo? It's hard to do with someone elses kid though I guess

[babybarr]

Well I would just like to say with our earlier nap today O slept 1hr and 40mins!!!  We've been doing the earlier nap since Saturday - It's only about 20/30mins earlier but in the last 3 days we've had better naps than for ages.  The only thing I'm finding is that he is waking earlier which is something I'll have to keep an eye on.

Jo - I think on your move day you may just have to accept that Caleb will prob end up having a nap in someone's car at some point - unless he'll sleep in the buggy and then it's worth getting your friend to try that rather than upset him trying to get him to sleep in a light room with someone else doing wiwo.

[*Becky*]

Yay Laura!!!
I agree about the nap. I would be really stressed thinking about someone else doing WIWO with H. x

[*Jo*]

Ugh she can't walk him in the stroller she's got two other kids (aged 3 & 4) eek I don't know what to do now

[teilvnav]

Been lurking... Jo, for the nap on moving day I would just tell your friend to get her kids to do something quiet during the winddown (a video while Caleb sits in her lap?) and then offer the nap (with the window covered by a blanket or something) but not push it if he refuses. She has two kids, so she has got to have experience with toddlers refusing to sleep. And maybe he will be so tuckered out he will crash.

Nathan refused his nap when we were visiting friends (he was 15 months old); he played very happily with their 5 children and two dogs, and then fell asleep in the car on the way home after an 8 hr A time. He slept 45 min and I put him to bed super early.

[*Jo*]

Yeah that's a good idea, I kinda thought that if he doesn't nap then oh well, we have had full days on a 10min nap (like the other day!) so one day won't hurt, I thought I could quickly come over to her place at naptime and walk him in the stroller till he falls asleep and then leave again. But then why can't he just learn to sleep at someone elses house like other kids do? Her kids happen to be the kind that just fall asleep, plus she did CC with them, even though she says she wouldn't do it again she still wouldn't know what to do with Caleb, ugh sometimes having a BW kid actually makes things harder in situations like this

[babybarr]

ugh sometimes having a BW kid actually makes things harder in situations like this

Yep it can do.  TBH I think you are going to be too stressed to worry about going to do a stroller nap for caleb.  Would he fall asleep in the buggy just in a room - she could push him back and forth, I do this at the ILs although DS has started to refuse to sleep like this now

[katie80]

I will keep offering the nap at 12/12.30 and bed at 7/7.30pm

I think this is probably the best plan, Jo.  Yesterday, I would've gone for the 12 pm with the 6:10 am wake.  I know he stayed well in his crib until 7, but I've found I still need to factor that time in.  Anything over 6 hrs these days is disastrous here.   

In terms of the nap on moving day, I'd do exactly what Amy has suggested.  Your friend can offer the nap, but honestly if the whole thing is just going to stress you out more, then just let her go with the flow and he can fall asleep when you pick him up.  When Claire is playing with other kids and busy, it's amazing how long she can keep herself going even though she's way OT. 

[*Jo*]

so he slept 12 hours last night. put him down for a nap at 12.30, hed had lunch and pain relief, hed been mega grumpy all morning, i mean mega!

and hes woken up at 40mins!! Im sitting here in tears because Im just so over this, we havent had a decent nap in months, MONTHS!!!!!!!! DH says its because hes so used to waking up early from a nap that he just does it now, but theres no freaking way to make the nap longer!!!!!!!!!! he doestn respond to patting or wi/wo!

Im going insane, hes gonna be a nightmare for the rest of the day, its only 1.10pm and he has to make it to 7pm on a 40min nap??!!??!! FFS!

[*Jo*]

And indeed he has been a nightmare all day, tantrums, whining, crying. We do something fun and he can only handle it for five mins before he starts throwing a wobbly.

[koe2moe]

big hugs to you!  have you tried w2s to extend nap?  It seems like it's always the same bunch of kids having sleep issues   it's so hard!!!  we're having 5:50 wake up with 10-10.5h sleep also and grumpy, whiny, fussy boy   eye infection brewing here