Self settling with nightwakings

[Mum of PA]

Hello

My 8 1/2 month old began STTN at exactly 7 months (well we are still having initial EW's at 5.30am, settling then waking at 7am, but that is another story!)  but he still wakes several times a night and apart from when he is teething, he self settles.  These wakings range from a quick cry out and back to sleep to 20 minutes of grumping and grizzling and moaning then back to sleep and he usually does this about 3 times a night.  It just doesn't seem like he is getting a restful nights sleep.

I am pleased he self settles but (and I feel silly asking this) are these wakings normal?  I really don't remember DD doing this at all.  We moved to a new house about 2 months ago and his room is now right next to ours and I feel like I am on high alert all night listening to him  .

Thank you.

[Tweakster]

Hi there, it's probably more like you are sensitive to it now that you are closer - moms have fine tuned hearing for this stuff!  We all wake all night in the latter part of the night, kids do it just as much in REM sleep, it's normal.  Some do it more noisily than others, if he's able to go back to sleep then he'll just get better and better at getting through those wakenings.  20 mins does seem like a long time but he may just be in a sharp learning curve.  If he's not self-settling at any time then you need to review routine and other factors.  Any chance he's teething now???  That caused a ton of NW for us and our son was a good night sleeper (he EW too but as you say, that's another story!)  Also a new room takes time for them to get used to.

[Mum of PA]

Thanks for the reply.  He was teething about a week ago which caused some nightwakings and pain meds worked for that, but the tooth is through now and I am pretty sure there are no more just at the moment. 

We have had 3 pretty rough nights with him since my post not being able to self settle and I do wonder if my EASY needs a tweak.  Typical that this should happen just as my DH has gone away overseas for 2 weeks!

Anyway, we have had nightwakings at 10.25pm, 10.30pm and 11.25pm the last 3 nights where he has screamed absolute blue murder.  I tried the usual patting until calm then walk out, repeat, repeat which usually works, but the first 2 nights he went ballistic and it took over an hour to settle him (I should have just stayed in his room patting him until asleep (?), but we became a prop previously with this and I am very conscious of this).  I ended up feeding him the first night as he was so upset.  I stayed with him for 8 minutes last night and he settled after this.  I heard him at 2.12am and he settled himself at 2.20am - he was grizzling the whole time really loudly but never escalated to an "I need you cry", then again at 4.35am for a few minutes, then woke at 6am (I gave him the dummy which we only used at EW which are usually between 5am and 5.30am) and he woke at 7am.

Anyway if you could take a look at our EASY and see if anything stands out it would greatly appreciated!  Will just give you yesterday which is fairly typical:

Wake between 5am and 5.30am give dummy
Wake 7am
E solids then bottle an hour later
S Down to bed at 10.10 asleep 10.12  = A time 3 hours 10 mins

W 11.30 (usually sleeps 1 hour and a half to 1 hour 45 but was very hot)
E solids then bottle an hour later
S Down to bed at 2.40pm, sleep 2.53pm.  Took ages to go to sleep.  = A time 3 hours 23 mins

W 3.41pm
E solids then bottle before bed
S 6.40pm

W 11.24pm screaming, went in 11.27pm out of room 11.35pm he was still awake but calm
W 2.12 self settled, asleep 2.20pm
W 4.35 self settled
W 6am gave dummy
W 6.58am (I think!)

So generally he is having about a 3 hour 10min awake time in the morning and a little longer in the afternoon and around 3 hours (or less) before his last sleep.   He NEVER has a long sleep in the afternoon, always around 45 minutes.  I have tried lots of different A times, shorter, longer and I just can't seem to get him to sleep longer.  I will try and settle him if it is still early in the afternoon but generally I get him up now. I have also tried putting him down less than 3 hours for the last A time after his short sleep and it just tends to result in him taking ages to get to sleep at bedtime and we still get an EW.

Now that I have typed this out it seems OT to me!  Surely having so many NW (and some long ones at that) then initially waking early must be taking its toll.  Any suggestions on tackling these NW's?  I would love to get rid of the EW as well, he goes staight back to sleep with the dummy so I know he needs more sleep and I am sure it is a prop (although we don't used it any other time) - not sure if I have the resolve to do it while DH is not here though.
 
Thank you.

[Mum of PA]

So it is now 11.43pm and he has been gurgling and mucking around in his cot since 10.25pm - not in the least unhappy.  I briefly went in to check that his room was not too hot/too cold and it is fine.  I patted him for 2 minutes but he just wanted to play with my fingers and began 'talking' to me so I went back out.  So this now seems UT too me?   I just don't know.   My gut is telling me I need to increase his first A time and things might improve.  What do you think?

I am sooooo confused..... and need some sleep!

Thanks again.

[Tweakster]

Hi there, I do think I would try to add to the first A time.  Since he's going back to sleep after the EW we need to factor that in.  It's a long night.  So he would then need more A time after a long night (even though he has NW he's still getting a decent night).  I would try 3.5 and see what nap that gets. 

So like:
Wake 7
Nap 1.5 hrs @ 10:30 -12 (A = 3.5)
Lunch etc.
Nap 1.5 hrs @ 3 - 4:30
Bedtime asleep by 7/7:30
* if short PM nap, asleep by 6/6:30

Just throwing stuff out there.  Not really sure.  7.5 - 9.5 mths was the best nap time for us!  We had some NW for teeth but nothing major.  Of course we always have had EW.  Then it all went to pot for the 2-1 :-)