Here for another good cry

[aidenmc]

DH is such a sweet 6mo, but his nights are killing me. He is now generally up 8-10 times per night - two nights ago we counted 16 times! This also generally includes an extended nw or two of about 1.5 hrs when he is fully awake. He has reflux and is teething but generally happy throughout the day unless tired or hungry. But he has NEVER slept well. He's not screaming in pain when he wakes, but just uncomfortable or wanting me I guess.

Tried for the second time to get him to fall asleep in the crib and failed big time! Lasted about 45 minutes with his heartbreaking sobs then caved in and held him in my arms while he fell asleep. So, I have taught him nothing, made him sooo upset for no reason and likely made any next effort even worse. Except that I cannot do this. I can't let him cry in that way. Don't get me wrong I can handle when he's crying loud when tired or something, but not these cries. And so I am trapped in this life where nights are complete hell and I feel worse and worse each day, going on only a few broken hours sleep at night. Even tried co-sleeping last night. Only lasted an hour as he was so restless.

And I was so sure I would get it right this time. That's right, it's not like he's my first baby. Feeling like such a failure but at the same time leaving him to cry in that way and not holding him just feels so wrong. Am so sad and stuck right now  .

[anjabibby]

Big big big hugs to you. Sounds like you are having a horrible time.

I feel like a complete failure too with my 8mo old not sleeping either. It is so hard when they just wont' sleep as it impacts on everything. Sounds like you are having a really hard time though if he is waking so much. I have also been in the co-sleeping camp, but realise that this isn't a long term solution.

Are you trying Pu/PD? I have also taken to wearing ear plugs sometimes as otherwise I can't take it. Sometimes, I also just leave him when it gets too much - not for long, a couple of minutes only - just to get out and take a couple of deep breathes.
Are you giving him pain meds and reflux meds - to see whether this helps. Is he OT when he goes to sleep?
Just know that there are people there with you and know what you are going through. Big hugs Anja x

[Jenn+Ethan+Emily]

(((((hug))))) it's so hard to deal with NWs. Hoping things turn around for you soon!

[Shiv52]

{{{hugs Becky}}} 

[Mama2boys]

can I join you lovely ladies....your posts are mine feeling like a failure as well...

[louis-mummy]

((((huge hugs)))))

i can remember feeling like that 

do you have anyone who could help you so that you can get a longer period of unbroken sleep, or even a night?

i know its not the place for advice but are you able to get him to settle for naps ok, that's where i started as i found i had more energy and patience during the day and once he had learned that then i moved on to dealing with the night time.  also i would often need to use lots of body contact (leaning over with gentle weight on him) but tried not to actually pick him up or rock him.

Its SO SO hard though, its surely a natural instinct to pick them up when they cry and those instincts seem so much stronger during a never ending night......no way are you a failure  nor you too Anja and Mukta 

((((more hugs)))))

[~inbalance~]

(((hugs hugs hugs))), I totally hear what you are saying.  You are not a failure, not all babies are easy and unfortunately some of us are never blessed with the angel ones.     I'm still bitter that I'm not entitled to babies who sleep.    Lots of hugs from me my friend, I am there too and so very tired and discouraged much of the time, but one day it will pass and then we can erase it from our memories and only remember the good times. 

[babybarr]

Big (((((hugs))))) from a mother of a bad sleeper too.  Hope you get some better nights soon.

[~emmalou~]

}}}}}}}}}}}}hugs{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ xxx

[essexlemon]

Sorry you're having a horrid time.  Sounds like when DS was a bit younger.

Don't feel bad about taking him out of his crib.  DS would settle with WIWO even when he was teething, but whenever we had a reflux flare up he'd screem for literally hours without going off to sleep. 

Is your LO on any medication for the reflux - sounds like you may need to ask for it to be reviewed?

All I can really say is that it will get better eventually.  I know it feels like forevever but somehow you'll find the strength to get through.

Hugs

[*Liz*]

(((hugs)))

[We Three]

AW, big hugs from me too....and if you would like to ask advice or support from Moms who have btdt, or who are going thru it right now, just let me know and I'll pop this thread over to the NW's board. But for now...lots and lots of (((hugs)))

[aidenmc]

Thanks so much everyone. Your support really helps. He is on meds for reflux, doesn't generally scream, though lots of grunting and general restlessness. Amelia, feel free to send to the NW board. Though I had a good nap day yesterday, had him all medicated etc. for bedtime and he slept from 7:20-10:00, he was up much of the rest of the night.

[~Amz~]

Sorry Becky to hear that you're still having a tough time. ((((Hugs))))

[essexlemon]

Just offering more hugs.

I know with DS when his meds weren't quite right he was a real screamer, the grunts were usually something else troubling him but as we all know, all LO's are different so could be worth telling your Dr about the trouble you are having when you next have a review.

The ladies on the NW board are fantastic - I got life-saving advice there with DS.