Twins/EASY/evenings & night sleeps

[Mrsgoat]

What a wonderful forum - I wish I had found this with DS (3)!  I have read Secrets of the Baby Whisperer over the past couple of weeks and I feel like I know my 10 week old twin boys so much better now.  The main change I made which seems to have helped with their 3 hourly EASY routine was keeping them awake longer - I was often putting them down immediately after feeding/winding when they had become drowsy and I thought they were ready for bed but that obviously caused all sorts of problems.  I haven't had a huge amount of time to look through the FAQ.  Now I feel like I have the day EASY routine fairly well sorted (as well as can be expected for two babies!)  But I have a couple of questions/problems:

1.  If they go over the 3 hours during the day - say they are awake for 1 1/2 hours and then are still asleep over 1 1/2 hours later should I wake them or leave them up to a certain amount of time, say no longer than 2 hours asleep in total?

2.  Evening sleep time has slowly come back from 10pm until around 8-8:30pm now (after quite often not napping between their last wake up (around 5pm) - I really try to get them to have a little nap between but they just will not, and are very much cluster feeding during that time - often having small feeds 3-4x each, then feeding to sleep at the end (which is generally the only time during the day they feed to sleep).  I don't seem to be able to break this habit (& we don't use a dummy - have tried but they won't take it).

[Mrsgoat]

3.  Obviously with them now settling to sleep at 8:30pm they aren't going so long into the night (previously they were say 10pm, 2-3am, 6-7am) - mainly doing a 5-6 hour stint then a 4 hour one until the morning.  I have tried a dream feed around 10, but it is like they don't actually realise they are filling up and they will still wake around 12-1am. 

[momtonb&ab]

i am sure more moms will be along with great advice for you...

i found that i always woke them on the feeding schedule - only because with twins staying on track was so important.  so i would get them both down and then wake whoever needed to be fed first within 15 minutes of the wake time. 

with that cluster feed at the end of the day interfering with your catnap you may be getting that midnight wake up because they are overtired.   if possible, it might be worth holding them off and doing one good feed before bed instead of 3 or 4 small ones.   that is a generally fussy time, have you been able to ensure it is hunger and not just fussy? 

you are doing great! so glad you found the BW books and the site - these moms are wonderful!

[Mrsgoat]

Hi there - thanks for that and your twins are beautiful!  You are right, they actually aren't hungry (tending to use me more as a human dummy) and are just fussy/tired/perhaps slightly colicky or atleast uncomfy in the evening.  It just seems a little bit easier to let them feed when they start getting fussy, esp as it's a busy time with having dinner, getting our 3 year old to bed, etc.  I didn't have enough confidence in my ability to supply enough breastmilk in the evening and I did think for awhile that they were hungry and decided to try and top them up with formula at their 4-5pm wake time thinking that might help them settle to have a little nap - however that didn't help at all.

[momtonb&ab]

and you say they don't take a dummy?  have you considered wearing one of them in a sling/carrier and having DH wear the other one (or use a swing/bouncy chair)..?  might help you get through that rough spell in the evening (and in my experience and that of a few other mom's i talked to) which they usually grow out of by 12-14 weeks.    and try the dummy again if they will take it, might just be a need to suck or be comforted. 

[Mrsgoat]

Ha yes that's the story of our evenings at the moment - one in the sling, the other in the electric swing or DH tapping the boucinet with his foot while eating UNTIL they get really crabby and their grizzling turns onto full-bore noise.  So I'm thinking I'll take more notice tonight & perhaps write down exactly what time they're feeding to get a better picture.  It's probably along the lines of 5pm, 6:30pm, 7:30pm then feed to sleep (or more like nipple pacifying to sleep) 8-8:30.  I thought about trying a few different brands of dummy but am in two minds about it - we've got this far without I don't want to become reliant on one (refluxer DS had one from 2 days old until he gave it up at 2 1/2.)

[momtonb&ab]

try seeing if you can do 3 full hours between those last feeds (instead of clustering) and see over 3 or 4 nights how that affects the night waking.  we found that our kids had a good feed before bed, then for a while the DF around 10, then woke 2 and 5, eventually giving up the 2 and then the five...could be the snacking is not filling them up enough. 

i am sure you are exhausted too - be sure to have all your fluids and healthy dinner too - i know the end of the day is tiring and it is tempting to not take care of yourself too...but no one will be ok if you aren't.  hang in there....this too shall pass.