Ds2 nearly 10mo nw gone crazy need a sample routine that fits?

[gemma2313]

Hi
My ds2 has started waking 3-4 times a night and is now waking at 4.30 - 5 am and wanting to start the day I think this is the start of the 2-1 trans. My problem is I have a toddler who has wonderful naps from 12.30/1ish til 3/3.30 every day and I really can't have the two napping at different times otherwise I will never get out of the house!
Does anyone have a suggested routine that works/worked for them for a 10 mo and a 28 mo? Ds2 wakes at 6.30 (if i manage to get him back to sleep!)has been having a short am nap of about an hr at 9.30 and then going down for his pm nap at 1.30 so I get most overlap but his nws and ews are getting worse so I'm sure he's needing more than 3/3.5hrs a time. Also he is now starting to refuse am nap!
I should also mention that we have been crawling for a month and are now pulling ourselves up to standing all day long and started doing it at nws!
So please Help from a sleep deprived mum!
Help please from a sleep deprived working mum!

[~inbalance~]

hugs!!  Not sure if it's much help, but I'll share what I do with my 9.5mo and 2.5yo.
DS1's routine looks like this:
8am wake
2-1:30 nap
8:30 bed

DS2:
6/6:30 wake
10 nap for 30-45mins
2 nap for 1.5-2hrs (ideally)
7/7:30 bed

DS1's routine is totally consistent.  DS2's varies from week to week as he is always changing things up on me.     We have anywhere from 1-3 NWings as well.

I know what you mean about needing their routines to work together!  I work very hard to keep their afternoon naps at the same time.  Luckily for me DS1 is very flexible, so I have been able to move his nap forward or back as needed while DS2's routine has been changing.

We were dealing with 5/5:30 EWs a few weeks ago and I found a later bedtime helped.  At the moment I'm finding he needs a longer A time before bed or else we get more NWings.  But it's tricky, and every time I think I've figured it out things change again. 

[gemma2313]

Hi Martina,

I'm pretty much in teh same boat. Ds1 is very flexible and lets me move his naps if need be, he also sleeps solid at night a good 11-12hrs and 2 - 2.5hrs during the day - in fact I often have to wake him from his nap so that he will go to bed when I want him to!

Ds1 usually wakes about 7,
naps 12.30 til 3 (a good 2.5hr daily)...
bedtime @ 7.30- 8

ds2 has been reasonably flexible so far (more because he has to be than he is!!)... I have my own business so NEED quite time to keep on top of things during the day.

With ds1 when we did the 2-1 I lengthened his am nap and dropped the pm nap to a CN. That meant that ds1's big nap was 11/11.30 for 2hrs for months... and it was really only when ds2 was born that he started staying up til 12/12.30/1 etc.

I just can't afford to do that with ds2... it will mean one of them needs to be in bed at some time between 10.30/11 through til 3... and I just can't do that!! I think I'm going to have to either push through with ds2 to an am nap at 11.30 or try to keep some sort of AP happening and have a CN in the am... and then pm nap from 1.30/2.... even an hour overlap is better than nothing.. but I'm really not sure how to go about it...

last night was so frustrating. He was awake at 4.10am and wanted to get up... I was in there until 5.20 trying desperately to get him back to sleep - without waking his brother - I tried rocking, feeding, patting, singing, rocking, patting, teething meds... nothing worked.. independant sleep is great but sometimes frustrating!... he was just awake and kept standing up in his cot and then screaming becaues he hasnt worked out how to sit down... and I recognise that "cot party" behaviour so I know its A time that needs work.. 

today after finally getting him back to sleep at 5.30 (ha!)... I woke him at 7am... he flat out refused to sleep at 9.30 (well derr to me really I mean thats only 2.5hrs A time!)... so we carried on through til 11.15.. then he was obviously tired so I put him down.. he went to sleep without any fight, he cried out at 12.30 but resettled and is still asleep now at 1.... no idea what I'm going to do this afternoon though...

His bedtime was 7.30, but I think its going to have to jump forward... either that or we might have to start an afternoon walk for a CN... that worked for a while with ds1.

[~inbalance~]

Well, I think it sounds like you've got a pretty good idea of what is going on and what your options are. 

So you have two obvious routes for the 2-1 here. 
One is to push him to 11/11:30 and then sneak a catnap in later on somehow if necessary. 
Two is to squeeze a catnap in the morning, and then put him down at around 1:30ish, then do an early bedtime.  If you do this then can you push DS1's nap back to about 1 to get a bigger overlap?

If it were me I would be going for option 2.  That's what I'm planning for with DS2, because I know he will take the early catnap no matter how short his A time is (DS1 was the same). 

Seeing as how the other route worked for your DS1 I guess you would know best if it would work again for DS2. 

[~Sarah~]

So I am right here right now...I have a 23mo DS and an 11mo DD.  DD is spirited and is on the long end of the A times, so we have been on 1 nap for about a month now.  Same here DS will let me moe his nap around, but DD is a little harder.

Where are you in the 2-1..or have you tired moving to it yet?  My DS was also like yours and took sometime to get to a noon nap time..actually took him until 14mo to fully be on 1nap.

Right now I am having short naps bc of teeth and development stuff...but this is what our day normally looks like.

DD:
A  4.45-5hrs (wake between7-8am)
S  2-2.15  (1130/1200 goes down)
A  5-5.5

DS:
naps noon-2  I have to cut it for him for him to fall asleep by 8.  He has always needed long A before sleep.

So I am not sure if that helps you or answers your question, but I can tell you that as soon as this tooth comes in and she is back to 2hr naps, we will have set naps of noon-2 for both babies.  I have chatted with plenty of other mommies and this is acceptable for a LO like my DD.

So I guess the answer is to start getting their naps to meet in the middle.  You may have to put up with some long stretches while you are switching, but depending on your LO you may be able to get things moving.  What really helped is not being scared of an early BT with #2.  That is what really helped get DD on a solid 1 nap.

Sorry, I don't really feel like I am answering you specifically, but I honestly think you have something in mind so I just can offer what we are up to.  I can also point you in the 2-1 boards and see if you find a better answer there.

http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=95670.0
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=41952.0
Sarah

[~inbalance~]

lol Sarah I had to do a double take because I didn't realize at first that you changed your name. 

Yes, Sarah is the master of juggling two routines and making them work.