Starting out properly now, advice please!

[emmam202]

Hi

The special care baby team have discharged us today because Louie is now 9 weeks actual/3 weeks corrected age and is a very healthy 9lb 4oz.  So I have decided now is the time to start getting him onto EASY.  He is already pretty good during the day because I have been using little bits and bobs already (not letting him sleep immediately after a feed and putting him down for naps upstairs and trying to get hi to settle himself a bit).  But up til now it has been all demand feeding etc and I would like to get him into a better routine and try to increase the time between feeds at some point.

The main problem is at night when he will be ok til about 1am and then he will be really unsettled for the rest of the night with full blown crying every 2 hours so I have to pick him up and feed him.  He will only feed for 10mins though and then goes back to sleep for a bit.

If anyone can give me any ideas of what my next steps should be I would be really grateful.  To give you an idea of where he is at the moment this is what the morning has been like today, all led by him.

8am woke up for a feed
8.30am finished feeding
played and nurse came to see him
10am, started to whinge a bit and yawned so put him upstairs and he has been settled since then

[anna*]

Remember that he's still sooooo very young so set your expectations accordingly. This link will help: http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=1993.0

How often is he feeding during the daytime? At night, do you think he is nursing to comfort himself to sleep? Does he have a pacifier/dummy? Is he swaddled? At this age you need to keep his awake times VERY short - no more than 60-75 mins tops. That's total awake time and includes feeds and winding down to sleep. Yes you will feel like all he does is sleep, but that is fine. Sleep begets sleep and the better he sleeps in the day the better he will sleep at night.

[emmam202]

Thanks, this is what today has been like which is pretty typical for him.

8am-8:30am feed
10am sleep
12noon feed
1230 was awake and alert but once in his car seat on the way to tesco he fell asleep, he then was dozing on and off whilst at my parents.
3pm-3:15 feed
unsettled and whinging
5:15-5:40 feed
unsettled and whinging
6:30-7:10 feed
fell asleep straight away after feed, still asleep now at 8:30

from now I expect him to wake again at 9ish for a feed then straight back to sleep, then wake again at 11-12ish, then wake again at 2-3ish and then unsettled and waking every hour or so until 6/7am

He is so awake and alert now, particularly in the morning, I put him down for a nap as soon as I see his sleepy signs, should I be putting him down sooner if he has had enough A time?

He does have a dummy and yes he is swaddled most times I put him down.

Its just hard to know exactly where he should be since he was prem.  The nurse told me today not to expect him to be doing things at the same time as a term baby but also not to treat him as if he is only 3 weeks old because he's much further on than that.

[anna*]

Yeh, I think he really needs more naps. Even if you take his unadjusted age, most babies are getting 4 naps a day. Overtiredness accumulated through the day will definitely disturb his nights. If you think he's not that reliable with his sleepy signs then yes I would try following the clock for a few days and see if that helps. You could try something like

8am awake, feed
9.15am asleep
11am awake, feed
12.15pm asleep
2pm awake, feed
3.15pm asleep
5pm awake, feed
6.15pm asleep
7pm awake, feed
7.45pm asleep
9pm awake, feed
9.45pm asleep for the night.

Obviously if he wakes early from his naps, he'll need his next nap earlier. You might find this link useful too: http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=164027.0
If you think he's a bit more ahead than 3 weeks but not quite at 9 weeks, why not split the different and try a 6 week old routine (something like above) and adjust if it's not working?

[emmam202]

Ok so its another day and another unsettled night from 2am onwards.  So far he was up at 8am for a feed, I've put him down for a nap (awake, swaddled tight with his dummy) at 9am and he seems to have settled pretty much straight away!  Fingers crossed for a better day although we are at the hospital for blood tests later on so that will throw everything out I imagine.

Should I wake him from his nap if he goes over the times?

[anna*]

yep, wake him for his next feed.

[emmam202]

Lol, didn't need to wake him, he woke at 10am anyway so I've had to feed him again and have settled him back down at 11am.  Am I doing the right thing?

[anna*]

Yep that sounds fine. Was he crying hungry? It may be that you're able to settle him back to sleep without a feed.

[emmam202]

He's been asleep since 11 now so I'll wake him at 1 if he doesn't wake before and feed him then.  At least its not as awful as I thought it would be settling him down.  He seems to be ok if I put him down awake, swaddle him and put a blanket over to cut out the light a bit more.  I've only had to go up a couple of times to resettle him and he was asleep within 15 minutes. I know he's only really young still but since its just me it would be good to get him into some kind of structure so that I can get something done!

[anna*]

It sounds like you're both doing great! Let us know how the day goes.

[emmam202]

I'm just worrying now about going out later!  I feel like I could keep this up if we never had to go anywhere!  Based on the 3 hour EASY today we will need to leave for the hospital part way through his next sleep and then he will need feeding while we are there (not a problem, they'll just have to wait!).  Unfortunately that means it looks like his A time will then involve having a needle shoved in his hand poor little thing!

Thanks so much for your support, off to wake him now for another feed.

[anna*]

Yep, that's what the first months are like. It's OK though, we all just muddle through. A busy day can be followed by a quiet day at home, and if a nap gets cut short, just bring the next nap early.

[emmam202]

Well we've had a better day today.  Managed to get him on a 3 hour routine a bit more, his sleep this afternoon was disturbed by a visit to the dr so I he's gone down a bit early now.  Hopefully I'm doing the right things still.  He was still grumpy this afternoon but more manageable because I think I knew it was just that he was tired.  I might try the dreamfeed thing tonight.  Would be lovely to get him to sleep a bit more at night.  Last night he was unsettled the whole time from 2am.  I don't think I had more than half an hours sleep at a time.  Any tips?

[anna*]

Do you think it could be discomfort?

[emmam202]

I'm not sure, he sleeps so well during the day I can't see what would be different at night??  The only thoery I have so far is that he doesn't feed so well at the 1-2am feed and then never gets full enough to settle after that.  I have been feeding him at about 8:30-9pm then again at 11-12ish.  He then tends to start waking up anytime from 1am and wont settle again properly.