I just need someone to tell me if I am missing something

[mysweetgirl]

My 4 month old has never been a good napper. Ever since she left that sleepy newborn stage she has only slept 30-45 mins at a time.
I am currently doing a 4 hour EASY (trying that is, she wakes so often I cant keep to this schedule)

I BF her. I have been doing BW since she was 8 weeks with shh/pat and trying to extend naps. Extending naps is a painful process for me and for her. It is so stressful that I dread naptime now. There is definitely no Y in my EASY. I HATE putting her down because I know the next hour and half- two hours are going to be a battle.

She wakes at teh 45 min mark without fail. And I shh/pat her after she starts to fuss (she will wake happy a lot of the time so I leave her until she fusses and then I go into her)/ She becomes even more frantic and upset when I start to shh/pat her and she struggles so so so much to go back to sleep and it breaks my heart to see her struggle. She seems to settle for a second and then BOOm she realizes she is falling asleep again and cries even harder.

One time, and only ONCE, she slept for 2 hours. And since she was about 4-6 weeks she has had super short naps. I was just going to deal with it but now I am wondering if I am doing something wrong. Or maybe someone here has another idea of somethign I can try. I tried W2S but it didnt work. I gave it about a week of trying off and on.

Shh/pat doesnt have the same effect as it used to. It doesnt settle her as nicely as it used to and even though I can usually get her back to sleep to extend her nap b...she is not happy at all and the rest of her nap she cries off and on.

I just dont know what to do anymore. I am to the point of feeling like this needs to change. It is so hard to stick to a 4 hour      Easy when her naps are so messed up

Thank  you for any advice you might have for me

[Marie-O]

Hello! I have the same problem, my LO is also 4,5month, doesn't nap longer than 30-45min and is impossible to resettle. When she wakes up I leave her to see if she resettles but never does, she does the mantra cry for 30min and then stats crying, I do shush/pat with no success and then is almost time for her next meal.
I've tried w2s and it works 50%of the times.

Does she sleep well at night? mine sleeps well at night and is capable to resettle on her own during the night, but I don't know why she can't resettle at nap time....

I'm sorry I can't help much, I look forward for the advise they might give you.

[mysweetgirl]

Hi, she just went through about 3-4 weeks of horrible nights when she turned 4 months. But she is doing better now at night and waking 1 or 2 times so I cant complain about nights. She woke 2 times last night and resettled herself as well. So, I know she is capable.

I am not even sure what to do with our EASY when her sleep is so messed up. Come to think of it, I have never been successful with EASY because she has never napped more than 30-45 mins. I tryhard to keep her on EASY but it is so hard.

[Marie-O]

I know exactly how you feel. Our easy is messed up too, I haven't being able to transition to 4h easy since she only naps for 30-45min. It's so hard!!

I think at 4month they have a huge developmental phase (rolling over, teething, more awareness of the environment, etc) . My lo also used to have terrible nights with lots of NW and now she wakes only once and is able to resettle herself in few minutes. But naps is another story....before we had to stay with her and shush/pat until sleep (for 20-30minutes) but few weeks ago we started to leave her alone since she only did the mantra cry and now she settles on her own for naps (it takes her about 10min, but at least she does it on her own).

I'm out of ideas too....I've tried w2s and is not working all the time. The only thing that has worked is staying with her on her room, so every time she stirs or jolt or open her eyes I just put my hand on her shoulder, or turn her to a side (she is a side napper) or put the paci on....sometimes it works and I manage to extend naps until 1h. But I've being doing that long time and she still not capable of resettle.
I've tried also leaving her on her own to resettle and she mantra cries for 30min and then real cry and then it's impossible to stop...unless we take her out.

I was told also that they eventually outgrow this 45min naps, so I'm hoping at least at 6month maybe she'll sleep longer...

Hang in there....you are not alone

[Shiv52]

Firstly am sending you both huge {{{hugs}}}

I too have a 4 month old and she is a torture where napping is concerned.  She is my second though and my first wasn't great at napping until 5.5 months and then it all fell into place so there is hope!! So at the minute I am rolling with it.

I am bfing and we haven't quite made it to a 4 hour EASY yet.  Its more like 3.5.  A lot of BF babies don't transition to a 4 hour EASY for a while yet.  Are they managing 4 hours between the feeds ok.

One thing I learned from my first is to put a limit on how long you extend a nap for...I ssh-patted for 10-20 minutes and if she didn't go back to sleep in that time I got her up and got on with my day.  My sanity would not have taken any more extending than that.

With a short napper it is totally ok for your EASY to be EASASE if you know what i mean?  SO keep your feed times regular and work your A and naps around it. 

So if you feed 8 then 12, you may find your morning goes like this:

8am Feed
9.30am Nap
10am Wake up (not able to extend)
10-11.15 A time (shortened A time because of short nap)
11.15 Nap (45 minutes)
12 Feed

Make sense? 

The only thing that has worked is staying with her on her room, so every time she stirs or jolt or open her eyes I just put my hand on her shoulder, or turn her to a side (she is a side napper) or put the paci on....sometimes it works and I manage to extend naps until 1h. But I've being doing that long time and she still not capable of resettle.

My LO used to wake at the 45 minute mark without fail.  I used to go in at the 30-35 minute mark and replace her paci and ssh her bck over and she would then make it through the sleep cycle and continue napping.  I did have to do that for weeks and then she started making it through on her own and taking longer naps herself.  But in my eyes I preferred that quick intervention than a short nap.


There is a lot going on at 4 months.  Huge growth spurt (probably accounts for more NWs), BF babies often become much more efficent feeders so length of feeds decrease, often become distractable feeders and lots of developmental stuff going on so its no wonder their napping can be up the left!

I am crossing my finger in a few more weeks things even themselves out. 

What A time are your LOs managing at the minute?

[Marie-O]

My lo can manage 2h of A time, but it always depends how long was her last nap....

I've being doing for weeks sneaking on her room to hold the jolts and shush/pat as soon as she moves, but still no success on her extending by herself ....It should have worked by now.