Hi
My 10 month old (4 weeks prem) DD is having terrible NWs - always has done but they are more than ever at the moment. I've always had problems with naps too and she has for most of the 10 months been a short wake, short nap baby (mainly due to reflux in early days I think) so I have a hunch this is where the problem lies. Anyway we are finally working on lengthening the A time and she can now manage usually between 3 to 3.25 hours awake time before the first and the second nap. She has only given up the 3rd nap a few weeks ago. I usually now get one good nap of an hour or sometimes just over (best is 1hr 20m) and the other one tends to be shorter - between 30 & 45 mins (short one tends to be mornings but not always). I'm working towards getting or would love 2 x 1 hour naps at least. I've been going off her cues lately but she can turn very quickly and if I miss it - she is OT and the nap is short. I think most of the NWs are due to OT but tbh I've read the 10 reasons why a baby wakes and I think we have are experiencing most of them!
Anyway a question I have is what should I aim for her A time to be after the last nap and before bed - Should it be the same as the other A times i.e. 3 to 3.25 hours and should they all be the same or should they increase as the day goes on? We dont really have a set bed time as it all depends on her last nap time which can vary quite a lot but we do have a really good bedtime routine but it takes 30 - 40 mins so I can't really go off her for this. I’ve tried so many combinations but because no two days are the same there are too many variables to ever seem to get it right. Also, what are A times supposed to be around this age?
We seem to be on a 6-6 day which I would prefer to be 7-7 but I’m not too worried about that now as the clocks are going forward soon so I’m hoping that will change it for me (not sure if it will be that simple!). What that does mean tho is that I can not really do an early bed for her as I don’t ever want to put her to bed before 6pm at the earliest. This makes it difficult if she wakes from her last nap at 2pm as it is 4 hours before bed and I know this can be too much for her (although has done it successfully once or twice in the past where we have had a good night of only 3 wakings),
Yesterday seemed a good day – she had an hour nap in the morning, I knew she was OT for the second nap and she woke after 30 mins but I got her back to sleep (by rocking her in my arms & putting her back in the cot) and she had another 30 mins. We put her to bed at 6:35 and she fell asleep at 6:55 (she had woke from the last nap at 3:30) and she didn’t stir till 10:05pm which is the best start she has had for a while. She then woke again at 10:30, 11:45 till 12, 2:45 till 3:30 and once again after but I’m just too tired to even remember what time.
Can anyone please help me as to what is going on and what on earth I have to do to get her to sleep through the night?
How old is your child? 10 months old (4 weeks prem)
What’s his/her daily routine? Wake bet 6&6:30, bf at 7am, breakfast at 8am, nap somewhere bet9&9:30 (anywhere bet 30m-1h), dinner at 12, depending on 1st nap sometimes bf before nap at 1:30pmish sometimes after bet 2&3pm, nap 3-3.25 hours after woke from 1st nap time can vary alot (anywhere bet 30m-1h sometimes a little bit longer if I’m lucky!), tea at 4:30, bf before bath & bedtime routine (usually 5:30pm), bed at 6-6:30pm
What’s nap routine? As above
How long are naps? As above
What's bedtime routine? Time? Bf, bath, dressed in bdrm, read a story before putting in cot. Usually bet6-6:30pm
Do you bottle or breastfed?? Breastfeed
How much? or how long? 3 times a day usually 10 mins each side (on & off a bit towards the end of each one). Can have a night feed 2-3 times per week bet 3-5am.
If breastfed.. one side or both?? (at each feed) Both sides every time incl night – will not take just one
How many wakes per night? Varies but far too many! A good night would be 3 times.
What’s your LO like when waking at night? How long is he/she up? Sometimes stirs and requires dummy replacing or hand on back if at the beginning of the night so guess OT but in the early hours she is starting to be awake for longer periods i.e. 30-60 mins. She always wakes crying and when we go to her and replace the dummy, she will cry when we go to leave so we end up staying with her and she livens up so we tend to sit with her until she has done her thing and is looking tired again so we rub her back until she drops off. But then she can cry out and stir 10 mins after this a few times. Some nights she wakes bang on the 2 hour mark throughout the night.
When you go to him/her is she fussing or crying? Or is it a mantra cry? As above.
What have you tried to settle?? Usually the dummy, rubbing her back, feeding as a last resort. We only take her out of the cot if she is really upset.
What do you do for A time and how long is it? Now starting to be 3-3.25 hours. Try to get out of the house at least once a day even if just for a walk or to see gran. Try to give her plenty of floor time with lots of toys. Try to lessen these when 3 hour mark approaches.
Are there developmental issues such as teething or milestones? She has been teething and seems troubled by these lots. The top 2 teeth have been coming through for the past couple of weeks but they appear to be through the gum now. She has just learned how to sit up on her own and is on all 4s rocking back & forwards so is trying to master crawling. For the past few days she calls for me as soon as I leave the room when she is on her own so not sure whether sep. anxiety is part of the equation too.
Do they have a prop? If so what is it? Dummy. Did try to wean cold turnkey over Xmas – worst week of our lives so really don’t want to be without it!!
