No Light at end of tunnel for 3 month old

[CuriosInhk]

My dd is 3 months and has had bad sleeping patterns since birth. She weighs 10.7lbs, born 5.8' dropped to 5.3 after birth.

I'm not sure if her nw is about hunger, growth spurt or habitual waking.

I BF in morning and nights as work full time, and she gets formula during the day. I get average 3 hrs sleep a night and is impacting my relationship with everyone, plus I'm not enjoying her as much as I should. Hence getting really desperate now. Think I'm getting post natal depression as a result. Would really appreciate some guidance.

Typical EASY looks like this. I try to start the day at 7, but she is awake from 4.30

E 0600
E 0700 BF 10 mins. She won't eat longer than this and usually fusses.
A 0730-0800. Getz tired after an hour
S 0830 - 10.30. This varies, sometimes she sleeps for an hour sometimes two.
E 10.30 - BF 10 mins
A 1045-11.30
S 11.30 - 12.30 or 1. This varies, sometimes she goes down later, and sleeps for about 1.5
E 100
A 1.30 - 3.00. Walk around park
S 3 - 4.
E 400
A 4.30-5
S 5 a 5.30. She is irritable around this time and needs a short nap
E 6.00 cluster feed starts
A 6.30 - bath
E cluster feed
S bedtime. She has been great. She sleeps on her own
DF 10.30

Now the night waking begins

1.30 wake, hungry and feed. Pa I in, bit she spits out. Feed only seems to calm her
3.30 wake hungry and feed, same as above re pac
4.30 - 5.30 waken toss and turns, squirms a lot, grunts. Does not seem to be fast asleep, but eyes are closed. I shh pat, put paci in
5.30 starts wailing, shh pat until 7. I tried pu/pd. She can settle for 30mins or so, but not long.

Would really like some constructive advise, as I'm at my wits end. Unfortunately I work FT.

Thank you.
 
 



E

[rachelusc]

I feel your pain as we have been struggling with various sleep issues with DS who is now 16 weeks.  We had a lot of NWs (still have too many for our taste!) starting at 1:30 as well, but did a wake to sleep (w2s) for three nights to eliminate the 1:30 wake up, and it actually worked.  It got us down to a 2:30 or 3am feed (some nights 4 or 5am even), and then some EW in the 5-6 hour (but like your LO in the 4-5 hour, not a full awake), then up for a feed around 6:30 or 7:00.  Have you tried w2s?  If not and want to try, just go in at 12:30 or so (unfortunately it's a few days of waking up at this hour, but if it works - worth it!) and jiggle her a bit with a hand on her abdomen and cause her to stir.  DS will roll his head around a bit when we've done it right.    This will break the cycle of the usual wake up time and make sure DD is truly waking from hunger and not habit.  It won't eliminate all NWs but even one less is an improvement at this age. 

The only other thing I can say is that you are not alone and this will pass eventually.  It seems like forever, but in a few months you will take a sigh of relief and be glad it's over.  Also...I BF my DD exclusively for 5 months so I know this is a sensitive issue.  But - if this continues, could you pump and let DH take some nights?  BW recommends two on, two off and we have learned that this is beneficial for us. 

Good luck...
Rachel

[paigesmama]

Hey there! Big hugs to you...I hope things get better soon!

Our DD is 3 months as well and I just started EASY and putting her in her own crib 5 days ago, she was similar with the grunting, un settled sleeping at that time and also woke atleast every hour. I BF only so its a bit diff there but she is 11 lbs, and was addicted to boobs lol...no pacifier etc.

Does she have reflux? I think that contributed to my DD grunting/unsettling at that time BUT regardless - have you tried elevating the head of her crib? Does she sleep in her crib in her own room? Have you tried just shh/patting her back to sleep during one of her night feeds (try to make her go 3-4 hours at night without eating)? It can take up to 30 mins but it helps her to realize she wont always get the boob when she wakes up at that time.

Good luck xo

[my3girlsjde]

That's a lot of nw's. {{{HUGS}}} I've gone through this and it was hard enough and I'm a SAHM.

My question would also be on reflux. Has she been checked for it by your dr? Is she swaddled?

She's a bit young for the pu/pd, you may find more success with shush-pat.

My other piece of advice is that a sling can do wonders when you have an OT baby. It can help them sleep when they need it and stay asleep while you get things done. Or like I did, gently sit down and doze off myself with the lo laying on top of me.

[paigesmama]

Yes I forgot to mention slings, mine is a lifesaver

[annette.xx]

Hugs to you...I too have a nearly 3 month baby and have been having these kind of NWs inspite of my good routine (mostly!!)...its a killer...dont know how you cope with working as well! You must be supermum!!!!

anyway just changed one thing and was amazed that it took me down to one NW...

I dropped the DF one night cos i darednt wake him after a bad day I had with growth spurt waking him from naps and he slept 7.30 until 4am!!!

then did it again the next day!!!

worth a shot!

Annette.xx

[CuriosInhk]

Thank you so much for replies. Dr says she may have reflux so gave her some drops. Can I push the 1am feed by giving her water?

Not sure which NW I should do w2s - the earlier or later times? To me she seems hungry for all nw, which makes it more confusing.

[ccg01]

I don't have much advice for you except what helped me survive (my LO was waking at least that often and I work as well, ugh). Going to bed early at least during the work week for a few nights made such a big difference for me -- but it would likely mean your DH would have to take the dreamfeed those nights. Is that a possibility? We did that with ODS and I pumped before bed for that feeding.

From what I remember reading, your LO is probably young to try water instead of a feeding. Would ask your doctor about that.

Does she feed very long at night? If she is dozing off during the first feeding, you might try gently waking her to extend that feeding -- offer both sides. So she is tanked up a bit more.