Finger foods vs real meals at 21 months?

[Love, laughter, & PJs]

I figure this is probably a case of 'if it ain't broke', but DH and I were talking about this tonight and I wanted some other opinions. 

It seems we end up giving Austin mostly finger foods rather than real meals.  Like for dinner tonight, DH and I had a stir fry, but Austin wouldn't touch it (which we anticipated) so he had chunks of cheese, hummus with pita bread for dipping and a few peas.  Sometimes he will have pasta with sauce, etc, but especially since dipping is such a big hit with him, he usually ends up eating finger-food type things.  When, if at all, should I care if he's having a real 'meal' rather than just bits of this and that?  I kind of feel like he's having glorified snack for most of his meals but he's eating (and generally good, healthy stuff) so do I care?

Thanks!

[~*Nicole*~]

I'm not sure, once DD could eat real foods I just started offering her whatever DH and I were having for meals. If she really didn't like something, I might give her something quick like what you are describing as "finger foods" but in general she has been eating "meals" since forever but that is not to say she eats them the way we would eat them. Sometimes she picks at them, often a lot of it ends up off her plate and on the chair/her clothes/the floor, etc. Just depends on what type of meal it is. A lot of our meals are child friendly; spaghetti and meatballs, meatloaf, mashed potatoes and corn, pasta based casseroles, pork chops rice and veggies, etc.

I don't think it's anything to be concerned about so long as he is eating balanced diet.

[brenda2]

we also do very child friendly meals which both kids would be offered .  but if i was doing something that i wasn't sure they'd eat, like a spicy stir fry i would probably have a back up - either do the rice separate with a few of the veggies boiled without any sauce or leftovers from the fridge if that fails.

i think what you are doing is fine, but just keep offering him the meal you are having as well.

[Love, laughter, & PJs]

Thanks, ladies.  Will keep on keeping on, I guess.

[Katet]

With DS1 he has always been a child who has sensory issues & food is a big one, he is pushing 8yo, & eating improves all the time, but it has been slow, ie books say exposure to foods 10 times... more like 200 times for him. We accepted that a long time ago.

A few suggestions would be that my boys eat modified stir fry. I cook the meat (soy & hoisin marinated) & pull some out for the boys, cook the veg & pull out those they eat & cook noodles & rice & serve the boys those bits & then pull it all together for DH & myself. Now to start with I'd make 1/4 meal from ours & add extras for them in things like cheese etc & over time it has got to them eating a full meal of the modified stir fry & if I do a blander sauce the boys eat the same as us.

[NZ_Mum]

My DS is the same, he's not really into "meals" as such, and prefers pieces of whole foods that he can pick and choose from.
I'll second what Katet says, in that I cook the same for DS as what we are having but pull bits out and leave it "deconstructed" which is how he seems to like it - to have all the flavours separate.
Otherwise as long as it's balanced I dont think it matters, the main thing is to make them feel included in the family meal time and the social aspect of it, rather than the food itself. That will come in time...
Good luck!

[Love, laughter, & PJs]

Good thoughts.  I suppose I could make more of an effort to break down our meals for him.  I think part of the problem is that often he'll get hungry and crabby so suddenly as we're making our dinner so it's easier to just put him in his chair with some food but then by the time our meal is ready he's already eaten a bunch. I guess we need to have dinner ready earlier!

[brenda2]

yeah, we eat dinner really early - 5pm.  if i can't have it ready by then we need to have a snack at about 4:30 and dinner at about 6.

[~*Nicole*~]

That happens around here as well if I mistime things. Our day fluctuates based on nap or no nap, etc. so sometimes I misjudge when DD is going to be hungry and when to start dinner. Last night she was tired and hungry and a disaster and ended up eating parts of dinner before it was all ready...just to get her fed and ready to go up for bed. She kept asking for apples, granola bars, yogurt, cheese, blueberries, or ANYTHING but the dinner I wanted her to wait for. If I had fed her snacks she wouldn't have eaten dinner but in reality it's not a big deal b/c at least she'd have eaten.

[Mom to M&M]

I WISH my DS would do "real meals" but it so doesn't happen. He too is hungry before the rest of us. And since DH is already eating later/after us (he's not usually home until 6:30 or 7) and DD and I just aren't ready to eat before 5:30 at the earliest, I just can't deal with three separate meal times. Plus he's a way picky eater with texture issues and food intolerances. AND he'll only use a spoon for things like oatmeal, applesauce or yogurt - not pasta or rice or the like and gets angry if we give him a fork. It's really rather frustrating. DD has "real meals" and probably has now since at least 2.5 or so BUT I do keep things separate for her. So like when I make a stir fry DH and I eat it all mixed together over rice but DD's plate has some of each item but separately - like rice in one area, chicken in another, veggies in another, etc.