Help needed with A times and naps UPDATED We're in a mess :(

[cuckoochick]

Yes, it absolutely does.

I think she needs more A time too.

First A = 2hr 20
SLeep = 1 hr 25 mins
2nd A = 2hr 20
Sleep = 1hr 15.

Will have to see about catnap of course! am I ok to cut that to 30 mins if the day got really long like yesterday?

Tomorrow I will push first A to 2hr 25 or shall I just be a dare-devil and go for 2hr 30??

Many thanks! You are a star

[Shiv52]

Yes you can cut it if needs be to get a more normal bedtime.  Some mums find while they are going through this transition they need to AP the cat nap with a walk in the buggy or in the car.  And because the CN is going it doesn't do any harm if you need to AP!  As once you drop the CN, the APing goes with it. 

Seeing as she's been doing 2.20 today I'd go for 2.30 tomorrow. I think she'll be able to handle it and you're ready to help her extend if needs be xx

Well done on all the hard work!  It makes such a difference when they are sleeping well! 

[cuckoochick]

Yes, well once I am confident on these A times, I'm working on independent sleep. Bedtimes have been encouraging so will definitely start on naps in the next few days.

Will go for 2 hr 30 tomorrow! Thanks again x

[cuckoochick]

She STTN 7:30- 7:10 when we woke her!!

Wahoo! I was honestly beginning to think she'd never do it again. It's quite amazing how adding 20 mins A time can really turn things around. This whole process is just amazing really!

Thank you. Gonna stretch to 2hr 30 to see where we get but pleased it seems to be good.

[Shiv52]

Wooooo!  What a wee star!  Good work!

Hope today goes well xx

[cuckoochick]

Thanks lovely x

[cuckoochick]

Hmmm, ok today was a bit of a disaster. Stretched A times to 2hr 30 but think this was the wrong move.

Awake and E 7:10
A = 2hr 30
S 9:40-11 (1hr 20 mins)
E 11
A 2hr 25
S 1:25- 2:50 (Woke after 35 mins, resettled) (1hr 25)
A
E 3pm
A
S tried for 40 mins to settle for catnpa from 5:00-5:40. Was happy and then began screaming and yelling. As soon as I left the room she was fine, happy and laughing.
A Bath
E 6:15
S 6:45 so A time of almost 4 hrs!

Urgh, so I am not sure what has gone on. Will go back to 2hr 20 for A times tomorrow as maybe OT crept in in that 2nd nap. Maybe I should have reduced A time from 2hr 30 as she only slept 1hr 20??? I know tonight is not going to be good for sure, because I can hear that although she's been in bed for an hour and a half, she's not really in a deep sleep. We keep hearing her stir and go back off.

I think the next few months are going to be tough.

Any thoughts? Thanks!

[Shiv52]

How did your night go?

Not sure if posted too late but if you'd an ok night I'd do 2.30 again. It takes 3/4 days of being consistent with A time increases to see a change. If you are able to extend the naps then OT shouldn't be an issue. My concern with changing every day is that you can end up in an OT/UT loop as it doesn't give her see body a chance to get used to the longer A times IYKWIM. I think the unsettled at bed was to do with refusing the CN which is even more reason to stick to 2.30 in case she is starting to consistently drop it.

HTH xx

[cuckoochick]

Thanks for getting back to me but I didn't see it so I went for 2hr 20 and got 1hr 20 nap.

She woke at 12-30 and wouldn't settle so I fed (she was holding out for a feed for definite) and then it still took a lot of APIng to get her back off. She then slept until 6:40 but was very restless from about half 4. What do you think then? Should I have stuck to 2.5 hr A today? I mean the night could have been worse but the night before she STTN- not that I expect her to every night. Your opinion would be great.

I get what you are saying about letting her body get used to it so will go back to 2.5 and stick with it. When we were on 2hr A time she'd often do 2.5 or sometimes more A to bed ok so maybe we will have to figure something out.

Today will be a bust for sure as am meeting my friend for lunch and there's no way around she'll have a short nap. I'm gonna set off early in the car, drive a long route and then park up and see. It's so hit and miss whether she will sleep but that's the best I can hope for today.

Thank you so much and sorry for being a nuisance!

[Shiv52]

Not a nuisance at all!!

Hope you'd a lovely  lunch with your friend and DD behaved herself xx

How'd your day go?

[cuckoochick]

The least said about today the better
Set off an hour early, drove for a 20 mile detour but she only slept 30 mins. That is all she will sleep in the car.

She was impeccably behaved- she always is. She loves to join in with whatever is going on bless her and hasn't cried tonight even though she is so OT.

Tomorrow is a new day so we'll start again with 2hr 30. I'm gonna stay in for a whole week to keep up with her routine as once it's set, I know I can be a bit more flexible but right now, it's not worth the anxiety I feel when she refuses to nap. The thing is she's happy not sleeping but it makes me desperately upset as I know she will be awake in the night, not crying, just awake, awake, awake.

Sorry for the moan and feeling sorry for myself. I just knew I shouldn't have gone but trying to work around solids as well is giving us less time to even pop to the supermarket. Ok, braced for the night ahead and ready to start again.

[cuckoochick]

Ok so I'm ready to be carted off to the asylum now. 

Last night was not bad at all after yesterday with daytime sleep totalling the grand sum of 2hrs 15 mins (1hr 20; 35 and then 20minutes) as she slept until 4:30am, had a feed and back down until 7:25am but today has gone to the dogs.

Awake and E 7:25
A 2hr 30
S 9:55- 11am (1hr 5 mins)
A
E 11:30
A 2 hr15 (I thought as she had only had 1hr 5, I should reduce by a little to prevent OT. Maybe this is where I went wrong? )
S 1:15-2:35 (Woke after 55 minutes, resettled straight away 1hr 20)
A
E 3:30
A
S Refused catnap again. Tried for 30 mins, gave up and bathed her instead
A
E 6:10
S 7pm (was a real battle to get her to go down as obviously OT- was aiming for 6:30pm at the latest, yet she was not really crying- kicking around in her crib and playing with the bars, only crying when I was rocking her to get her to go to sleep in desperation)

So that was an A time of 4hr 25 mins before bed 

Urgh, where am I going wrong? Do I need to extend the first A more? Cut it? Should I not have reduced 2nd A time?
I am so confused and sad. I thought we might be getting somewhere.

Thank you very muchly from a very sad mummy tonight

[Shiv52]

Sorry you are a sad mummy.  {{{{hugs}}}}

I probably wouldn't have reduce the A time.  I tended only to reduce if i got less than a 45 minute nap.  Maeve reminds me of Charlotte.  She was able to handle the longer A times even on less than perfect naps.  Shortening the A just led to a shorter nap next time too.  It was good you could resettle it though.  And what a wee star last night!  She's a wee angel. 

I do think she is in the dropping the CN stage.   i would stick with 2.30 tomorrow and see how it goes, obviously so long as she has an ok night.  

Can you AP a CN?  If you took her for a walk in her buggy or a drive would she sleep?  

[cuckoochick]

Hi, thanks for checking in with us. Have needed to find time to write a decent reply.

So yes, you are right, she is a star. Despite the horrendous day yesterday (as posted) she STTN! 
Well...she woke up when we went to bed at 10pm (I think we disturbed her). DH went in and she fell back to sleep the instant he picked her up and that was it until 6:05am this morning!!!! So it was an 11 hour night so probably OT but I couldn't believe it. Bless her, I was all ready thinking the worst, climbing the walls, not sleeping worrying about how little sleep I would get. Anyway, a 4hr A time before bed is not something I want to replicate everyday...well not for a while at least.

So today has been mixed. She has been extra hungry (I think we are hitting 6mo GS a week early- she was a week late and so other GSs have been a week early too) and I am beginning to see signs of a first tooth beneath the surface.

Awake and E 6:05
A 2hr 25 (she fell asleep way easier than I though
S 8:30- 10 (1hr 30)
E 10am
A
E 12 (hungry!!!)
A 2hr 30
S 12:30- 1:25 (Woke after 55 minutes because of DIY going on next door. couldn't resettle)
A
E 2:30
A 2hr 35
S 4:05-4:50 (45 minutes- she took the catnap very easily after the shorter nap which was a big surprise!)
A
E 5:30 (hungry!)
A
E 6:20 (Loooong feed)
S 7:05pm (A time of 2hr 15 mins)

So we shall see what tonight brings. I definitely think I am going to battle to get her to take the catnap if she does a longer 2nd nap. No amount of APing that I was doing (I didn't try feeding to sleep though obviously!) would get her down yesterday. I have decided if I think she's not going to settle to go out for a walk in the pushchair and if she takes the catnap bonus, then if not we have both had some fresh air, rather than me crying in a dark room and her crying because I am trying to make her sleep when she doesn't want to, then early bed. I think the car is out because it seems to take her at least 20 minutes of driving to fall asleep and even then it is not a sure fire way as I have found recently.

How long should I try for the catnap in that instance? Also, what sort of A time would you recommend if she doesn't take the catnap. I mean 4hrs yesterday was obscene but she wouldn't go to bed. She wasn't crying really, but was obviously OT. How do you balance between the early bedtime and then risking starting your day ridiculously early?

Thanks again!

[cuckoochick]

Things seem to be going ok at the moment. Last night with the catnap, she slept until 4am, feed then back down until 7:10am this morning.

Today has looked like this:
Wake up and E 7:10
A 2hr 30
S 8:40- 11:05 (1hr 25 mins)
E
A 2hr 30
S 1:35- 3:20 (Woke after 1hr, resettled quickly. 1hr 45 mins)
E
A 3 hr 5 mins
S 18:35

So no catnap. As she woke after 3, I thought the catnap wouldn't be until nearer 6pm which would mean a late bedtime if she took it anyway and she seems to be able to handle a longish A time before bed without disastrous effect but we shall see what tonight brings.