Settling LO

[Mum of PA]

Hi there

DS is 16 months and has a cold at the moment - it is not bad during the day but last night he was snuffling and struggling to breath - and he had a terrible night.  I cannot remember the last time we had to go into him at night and I REALLY struggled to settle him.  He woke at midnight and I didn't settle until 2.45am, slept an hour then it took another hour to settle then slept an hour then I couldn't get him back to sleep - so he got very little sleep.  I tried to settle in the cot each time but he was standing and clinging to me to settled on my shoulder sitting on a chair in his room patting his back. He could breath so much better upright on my shoulder (his cot is elevated). As soon as I lay him back down he went ballistic but I patted his bottom until he was calm then stopped.  Each time I stopped he would start crying again so I ended up patting him to sleep which took AGES.  Thing is he became addicted to shush pat when he was little and I am terrified he will again (it took so long to break the habit at 7 months and until then he was a dreadful sleeper).  I have just patted him to sleep for his nap (which we never have issues with) and patted to sleep again at the 45 minute mark when he woke.   If I stopped the sobbing would begin again.  He is clearly exhausted as well after such a terrible night last night (he usually does between 12 and 12 1/2 hours at night).

I realise he is sick and needs me at the moment - I suppose I just need some reassurance that this type of AP is ok just now, or is there a better way of trying to settle him?  I am probably being paranoid but I keep having visions of all our hard sleep training work going out the window and him having to have us with him to get to sleep again - ugh.....

Thanks so much.

[sianie]

Hi

I think most people would agree that when your LO is poorly a bit of APOP usually comes into play.

Have you tried using a chest rub & a plug-in vaporiser? These would help him to breathe a bit more easily. We also use a few drops of Olbas oil or Karvol in the corners of his cot.

You could try lessening the amount of patting that you do so it doesn't become a habit again? If your LO has been an independent sleeper, this will return when he's feeling better again.

Hope he's better soon!

[Mum of PA]

Hi there

I was so hoping after he got well we would go back to his routine but so far not good.  He has been completely well for  a week and a half now but we are still getting nightwakings every 2nd or 3rd night which he is impossible to settle for and now we have nap issues every couple of days and he is waking around an hour earlier than he was prior to him being sick. 

He has started waking at around 6am - 6.15am (his usual wake-up was between 7am and 7.30am with a bedtime of 7pm) and cries and cries - he just wakes up soooooo unhappy.  He used to wake and I could hear him babbling away until I would go and get him.  Now he wakes sobbing his heart out.  He was napping around 2 1/2 hours a day with me having to wake him the majority of the time.  Yesterday he woke after an hour and 10 mins and again sobbed and sobbed.  I got him up after trying for 25 mins to settle him again but he was extremely unhappy. I ended up taking him out in the stroller in the rain and he slept for another hour until I woke him.  He has been having wakings at the hour mark off and on over the last week or so and I can get him back to sleep with a small amount of patting, but not yesterday.  At the nightwakings he is inconsolable and have been lasted between 1 1/2 and 2 hours.  I pat him until he is nice and calm and still in his cot (I have also tried for longer) but as soon as I stop he cries his heart out, stands up in his cot etc.  It got to the stage my DH had to walk out to take a deep breath the other night after an hour and a half trying to calm him and literally 1 minute later DS went to sleep while DH was out of the room.  He hates us being in the room, he hates us leaving (he screams and sobs) BUT he settles so much better when we are not there.  Last night I patted him for about 10 minutes (longer than I wanted too), walked out, he cried/screamed, I went back in patted him again, walked out, etc this went on for 20 minutes, then I left him for a minute while he screamed/cried/sobbed (I needed a deep breath this time) and he went to sleep.  All up about 25 mins which is much better.

I am just not sure what to do next?  We have been putting him down about 15 minutes earlier than normal for his nap  but I am wondering if all of these wakings could be OT and we need to put him down much earlier?  If I did would you let him sleep longer than 2 1/2 hours?  Would I then put him down earlier for bedtime?  Any ideas how we can settle him for his nightwakings - these are killers for us as his sister is having nightmares at the moment and is waking as well - I am sure she hears his screaming.

Thank you again!

[sianie]

{{Hugs}} things aren't any better!

What you're describing does sound like he's waking from discomfort &/or OT.

Does he have any teeth coming through? Does he have his 1st year molars & canines yet?

Could you post his current routine so we can take a look?

 

[Mum of PA]

Thanks Sian.

All 4 of his canines have come though recently so I am pretty sure he is through teething at the moment.  I can't see or feel anything under the gums where his molars would come through.

His current routine (again, pretty all over the place due to his wakings):

Wake 6.15am (was 7am/7.30am)
Breakfast 7am
Snack 10am
Lunch 11.45am
Sleep 12pm (was 12.15pm)  Didn't want to put him down too early in case it just reinforces the earlier wake-up
Wake 2.30pm/2.45pm (same wake up as before)
Snack 3pm
Dinner 5.30pm
Bed 7pm

Thanks for looking at this - much appreciated.

[sianie]

So is he going down ok for his naps?

If it's not teeth then it points towards OT....you could try an earlier nap, say 11.30/11.45am let him sleep as long as he needs to to help him catch up a bit, if you get a short nap then do an early BT.