Nws + EWs + short nights are back.What do I do with this kid????

[Tweakster]

Why don't you think he is UT Laura ? Wendy also says the same. Lol seriously if I take into account who he is since birth plus the fact that he used to feel tired to have early BTs and now just isn't tired enough to go to sleep anymore. If he was OT long naps would sort it right?!

No.  Just because he isn't sleeping does not mean he isn't tired.  That's the one thing I have learned through all of this.  Sleep is about 90% developmental if you ask me.  The other 10% gives us something to work with.  And yes some kids are low sleep needs, from the beginning maybe, or some can become lower sleep needs as they go.  But I would not chalk up him not sleeping to being UT all the time or not needing/wanting the sleep.  Kids always need way more sleep than we think they do, and they have studies that show this time and time again.  He's surviving on it because it's what he knows and he hasn't worked out how to take more when offered.

You are right though; you can only offer the conditions conducive to good sleep habits.  A tweak here and there may help for a day here and there or you may even get spells where it just goes along tickety boo...only to end up at the same place.  It's not easy at all but it sounds like you are keeping an open mind as possible, which is the one way I have tried to make it through this.  We're still standing after all this time, Laura, Koe, Karen, me...and so will you be.  We're here for all the venting and cursing along the way :-)

(((hugs))) and double ((((hugs)))) for the illness, that sucks!

[Grants]

Thanks for the post Wendy;) it really means a lot!

Quick update: he only napped for 1.5 today, even though I was willing to let him nap fir as long as he would( 11 to 12:30). Asleep by 6:45pm!!! I entered the room at 6:30 and it only took him 15 mins to fall asleep !Yeah!!!! I finally managed an early BT!!! It took me 1.5 hours quiet time but I did it!!! I miss early BTs hehehe

[koe2moe]

Hoping for a good night for u!!!  Now u go to sleep yourself hehe

[Mom to M&M]

Awesome with the early BT!

And yes, we are here for you the whole way!

Still thinking there could be a physical component here? In addition to developmental?

[babybarr]

Hoping for a good night.

[Grants]

Thank you ladies !!!

I'm not sure if it's developmental or ilness Karen ?? I never know with this kid. Even when there is nothing going on he still give us a hard time with his sleep . I have done the maths and it doesn't look that good though . I mean with the early BT. He had to have 6 hours A time( it's normally what does anyway) + 1.5 hours quiet time to be able to go to bed early plus he had an early nap, so it wasn't a victory at all

Update: awake at 5am on the dot. So 1.5 hour nap+ 10 hour night= 11.5 total sleep. It is the best he can do tbh. I dont expect much more from him. The good thing is that there was no NWs!! ( I gave him meds at BT as i didn't want him to be uncomfortable with the cold/ conjunctivitis ). I don't think we will be able to get rid of the EWs tbh. we are going to have to live with it until he is a bit older?? Poor groclock,has never served Its purpose at our house. We can't even leave him by himself in the room as he can get out of the cot. So this morning, for example, DH had to go in at 5 am to wait fir the groclock which is set for 6am *sign* I'm going to have to change the time again. Perhaps 5:30*sign*. Perhaps we should open a thread of support for groclock unsuccessful stories ? Lol

[koe2moe]

Oh dear...  I was hoping that you could take advantage of him being ill and get some more sleep in him!  If you want him to wake at 6, and he can only do 10h night, then 8 would be the ideal bt.  Is that still too late for u?

I guess accepting is definitely going to help.  Cnstant puzzling and tweaking takes a lot of energy.  We also gave up from around 21mo, just so that we could live and try to enjoy life a little.  M perhaps does need a long wind down, maybe that would be the way to go to avoid very late bt.  Hugssss

[Grants]

 8 pm BT is Okish. I would rather have 7 or 7:30pm. But Oh well we can't have all we want. 

I had to put him down at 6:30 last night because he had an early nap( 11am). So I made the most of it and tried to get him down earlier to help him catch up. But of course he won't . He is feeling much better though. It was only a very mild cold. Plus the conjunctivitis is also better after being 3 days on meds.  I must admit 11.5 hours sleep is the best total he has done in weeks , perhaps months ( probably due to the ilness) and he won’t sleep much more than that TBH. It is useless trying to fight against his nature.

M perhaps does need a long wind down, maybe that would be the way to go to avoid very late bt.  Hugssss

Yeah I wil def invest on longer wind down ( I already knew that and we normally used to do more or less 45 mins wind down with him) But It will have to be in conjunction with 6/ 6.5 A time otherwise we always have resistance. He just won’t go down with less A time *sign* 

[koe2moe]

 Yeah fighting isn't what we want.  Hopefully you can arrange the day in a way that suit all of you!!  

[huby]

Just going with the flow, not beating yourself up and just trying to sleep when he does sounds like a plan. I'm wishing you better and sending plenty of hugs. You have one lovely, happy boy there from what I can see on the avatar. Well done you, it's so hard when they just don't sleep. I know it drove me mad for the year and a half she didnt and you must be totally exhausted. You're right just letting it be. He'll grow into sleeping more xx

[Grants]

Thanks Huby

Another 5 am wake up+ 2 nws . Total sleep 10.5 ( 1.5 nap + 9 hours night)He went down at 7:45pm( dh put him down I wasn't home) it's almost impossible to put him down early on nursery days. He is just too wound up to relax plus he goes down at 12 when he is in nursery so it's a bit later than the 11ish nap I can offer at home.

I realise that if I want him to have a minimum total sleep of 11.5. I have to put him down earlier for a nap and early BT. He will wake up at 5 doesn't matter what I do when he sees any sort of day light through underneath the door he will not go back to sleep *sign* he know it's morning and that's it. And that's is another thing that drives me mad! He *won't *go back to sleep and he won't wait for Mr sunshine either . I'm actually off to the groclock support thread now Grrrrr

[huby]

I have a towel under the door and complete total blackout in her room
And that helps a lot. Can give u details if u like xx

[babybarr]

You could put a rolled up towel outside his door to block out that crack of light - not sure it'll solve the issue but it may.

I don't think hun he is just like O and until you work out whether it's discomfort or the nap you'll have to do what you can.  I actually would just suggest the early bedtime at least then if he wakes in the night he may lie in?

Posted same time as Huby about the towel!

[Grants]

Thank you ladies I will def try the towels. I still think he senses its day as it is not pitch black like night iykwim?! We do have black out curtains but it's not the same as night.   But I will def try the towel tonight and will let you know how it goes .x

[huby]

I have actually - after LOADS of research found a blackout blind that does give you TOTAL blackout and I'm talking you can't even see your hand in front of you. I use that, and then a rolled up towel under the door.
I can give you details if you like because madam was the same and waking at the slightest suggestion of daylight, but this does work. PM if you want me to give you then name and sure advertising on he forum is a no no.
You can also try cardboard on the window - not a great look but i've done this while we're away and it's worked. Or throw a blanket over the curtain rail after he's gone to sleep so it blocks out more daylight and see if that helps. Some people use tin foil too.
I went for this specific option though as is permanent and looks nice too.