Extending Naps... am I doing this right?

[DSAN]

My DS is 19 weeks old (where has the time gone!), and since about 2 months old has been a miserable napper, but has always gone down easily on his own.... until this week. And he's been waking anywhere from 30-45mins into his nap for a while now. And he's been waking at night... every few hours... needless to say we are both a little over tired!!

Any way, I've decided this must stop, so have been going in when he wakes from his nap and re-settling him. Yesterday was day 1 and I had to pick him up and rock him back to sleep for his naps, but today he's been ok with me just giving him his paci, holding his arms down, and nuzzling him (shhh/pat just makes him angry at this point). Do you think he'll get the idea? Or am I creating props?

I keep trying to do W2S as we had some success with that in the past but I can't get the timing down right and when I go in there he's either already waking or is wide awake and trying to suck his thumb (but he hasn't figured it out yet and trying just makes him frustrated which wakes him up more). I've thought of just staying in there with him but there is always so much to do...

Any way... he's waking now! Time to eat!

[Shiv52]

I used to go in at about 30-35 minute just before she normally woke and replugged the paci and sshed her back over and that generally extended the nap.  After a week she started sleeping through the whole nap by herself.  I think because the intervention for extending was done while sleeping it didnt' become as big a prop as waiting for her to wake and then extending IYKWIM?

You could go in at about 30 minutes and wait until he stirs and replug and resettle then as opposed to staying in for the whole of the nap.  It will be worth it in the end! 

[DSAN]

I tried going in at 30 mins for his 1st nap, and it just woke him up, oops! Darn squeaky floor. Any way, took 40 mins to get him back to a deep sleep and then he woke up 10 mins later... sigh. Any way, just put him down for his 2nd nap and he was SCREAMING! I think a bit OT. We had to do a grocery store run in between naps and it pushed his A time a bit longer than it should have been. Any way, had to rock him to sleep. Not expecting a stellar nap after that... but we'll see!

I was thinking he may need a longer wind down? I don't know. Normally we do diaper change, lights out except for bedside lamp, cuddle, sleep sack, song, and into bed. However, he's started to fuss as soon as I turn the lights out, and he finds diaper changes really fun these days (I get lots of squealing, etc). But I'm not sure, seeing as there is a short window for him between yawns and meltdown...

I keep holding out for that 6 month mark when naps are supposed to lengthen on there own, but I don't want to 'rush' him to grow up. These early months are so precious! Even if they are frustrating sometimes

[creations]

Don't want to confuse you but maybe he needs shorter wind down?
My LO can't bare a long wind down and he will very quickly run out of patience with it.  I still get the timing wrong sometimes but many many times he can be high energy sit, stand, sit, stand and laughing/squealing (21 wks so pushing himself up to stand whilst holding hands must use a lont of energy), or having a really wide awake kick around on his mat, then the sleepy sign suddenly arrives and straight up to bed.  I do put him in his sleeping bag but he is usually fussing with impatience already, I stand and hold/cuddle and sing but I keep it all very short and when he kicks his legs that's it he has to go in his bed.
I tried longer wind downs and it really didn't do us any good.
Maybe worth a try to speed things up?

[DSAN]

Hmm maybe he does want a quicker wind down! Guess it's time for some experimenting My little guy is such a puzzle!

[DSAN]

So I did a long wind down yesterday... first nap went OK, 2nd nap was a SUPER meltdown! Had to put him in the wrap to settle but he fell asleep screaming and woke screaming - ahh the drama! Never got to nap #3 just put him down early.

So today for the 1st nap I did a short wind down and he fussed a bit more than usual but I pushed his A time a bit so I could finish breakfast and I think thats why. We'll see how nap #2 goes! Any way I hear him waking so I'd better pop in there so I can resettle!

[Shiv52]

How did rest of the day go?

CAN you post your EASY and we can take a look? 

[DSAN]

Well, for that day I believe our EASY went something like this:

Wake 6:15 (well, woke 5am but managed to get down again)
A: 6:45-8:40
S: 8:40-10:15 (1h 35min - had to resettle 1/2 way through)
A: 10:15-1:10 (I tried to put him down at 12:25... normally I would have taken his A time to 12:15 but we were on our way home from the grocery store)
S: 1:10-2:30 (he finally settled in the wrap, 1h 20m)
A: 2:30-5:30 (I tried for a cat nap, even in the wrap it didn't happen)
bedtime: 5:30 (since no cat nap, he was totally melting down. BT is usually 6:30 or 7ish)

I'm finding it hard to be consistent since I have to take him to physio 2+ times a week and those appointments are all over the place. We're almost done with those though so maybe I just need to limp through for now and do what I can.

Arg and now I hear him waking after a measly 30 min nap. Yesterday thats all we got as well.... I couldn't even convince him to go back down at all. Not sure what to do about this boy!

[DSAN]

Also to add, I think I've become a total prop... He falls asleep as soon as I pick him up! I guess it's an improvement from before when I'd have to put him in the wrap... But he won't settle in his bed. I feel like he's so OT I should keep doing it till he's rested and then try and break the habit? But I don't know. We are also getting a ton of NW right now, probably related to the OT. I keep hoping that we'll hit 6 months and all of our problems will be solved. But perhaps that's naive of me.

[creations]

I think I've become a total prop... He falls asleep as soon as I pick him up!

Have you tried just putting him straight back down again?
If I was too slow in getting LO down after his drowsy eyes and he actually fell to sleep I always told him quite loudly (but very lovingly) that I was 'putting you down in your cot now so you can get a proper sleep' and he'd generally open his eyes for a quick peep.  After that one of three things happens:
1. realizes where he is, doesn't like it, wakes right up and cries - PU again to re-settle
2. realizes where he is, is too close to sleep and too tired to respond, shuts eyes again and is back in dreamland
3. realizes where he is, doesn't mind, he's seen this place before and knows it's safe.

I really didn't like putting him down in his cot asleep because I always felt this was kind of cheating him and he'd feel upset to wake in a different place to where he fell asleep, but also because I wanted him to learn to go to sleep in there himself (of course).  Sometimes I even gave his hand a little stroke to get him to peep where he was.  I know it sounds crazy but I think it worked in our case.

[DSAN]

creations, I think you had it spot on with the shorter wind down. We seem to have hit a breakthrough!! DH discovered last night that the best order is cuddle, sleep sack, then bed, where we were previously doing sleep sack, cuddle, then bed. Turns out after getting in his sleep sack thats it! He just wants to go to sleep. I just put him down for nap #2 (well, #3 really as we had to go grocery shopping and had a 30 min nap on the way there and back) and he went down so easily. For nap #1 there was no fussing at all... just in bed, lights out, asleep! I even managed to settle him to sleep in his bed when he woke after 45 mins, but then he woke 15 mins later to have a poop and that was the end of that nap!

I feel so much better that he's settling himself as he initially goes down again. And next time if I have to settle him in my arms I'll try your other trick too! Hoping that he learns to sleep through that transition soon. He definitely needs the additional sleep!

[creations]

Brilliant!!!  That's so wonderful that you've had success today, I really hope it continues for you.
How adorable that your LO knows his sleep sack means bed and he doesn't want any delays in getting there.  It feels lovely when you discover something LO wants doesn't it (hmmm...do sleep sacks count as props?  haha!).

Now can you come over to the UK and sort my LO out please

[DSAN]

If it is a prop it's a good one! Well we are still only getting 30-40 min naps so obviously don't have everything sorted just yet he is settling a *bit* better, I haven't been picking him up though so the max length of nap we get is an hour... Not sure why I can't settle him past that but who knows. We're workin on it!!