Help to unravell a mess?

[dizzy]

Hi, can anyone help me with a bit of a mess we are in?
In a conversation with my dh this morning I have realised some things have been happeneing in the night I didn't know about and I am not sure if it is right or how to sort it out?

My lo has a feed at about 7.30 pm after a bath and then goes to bed. This is his screamy feed and doesn't always go well and he doesn't drink much and then doesn't sleep well as is very trumpy. I express at 9.00am and then go off to get some sleep leaving lo with dh. He does a dream feed at 10.00 pm ish and I now know he has been doing another one at 12.30 am ish. LO has been stiring at 3.00/3.30 am and I put dummy back in and settle in and he goes back to sleep. He has been stirring at 4.30 am ish and I have done the same. He does go back at theis time but is much more unsettled. I then have been feeding at 5.30 am. He then sleeps until 8.30 am and has a feed at 9.00 am. During the day he is not drinking as much as maybe he should and averages 4 oz. I don't know how to entend this. he still has 3 hr feeds in the day time.
He is nearly 12 weeks now but was prem by 4 and a half weeks.
He has 3 bottles of my milk and 4 bottles of formula in 24 hrs at the moment and has most of formula later in the day and at night. The 5.30 am is my milk.
What should I do? or is it ok as it is?

[Lolly]

Ok, well it's not too big a mess really!

First thing I would do is encourage your DH to stop doing the second DF, the trouble with that is it could be disturbing his sleep patterns and you could be teaching him to be hungry at that time as he will expect to eat then when he maybe doesn't need to. If he has that feed at 12.30, by 3.30 he could well be hungry which is why he's not settling properly and waking a short time later. I would do the DF between 10 and 11 as you have been and then let him wake when he needs to but try and resettle first if it has been less than 3-4 hours since the last feed. If it's more than 3 hours then I would feed and get him back to sleep ASAP.

He is still taking quite small feeds for his age, have you tried a faster teat to see if that helps him take a bit more? It could be that he isn't able to go longer than 3 hours yet because he is having expressed milk, BM does digest faster than formula (but 3 hours is totally age appropriate so it's not really a problem as such!).  I would also try and start his day at the same time, you need a 12 hour day/ night so if he is going to bed for 7.30 then have him start the day at 7.30 too. If the 9am start suits you then run a 3 hour EASY so he goes to bed at 9pm (but babies do seem to do better on a 7-7ish routine).

What do you think?

Laura

[dizzy]

hadn't thought about changing his teat to see if he drinks more, he is on the 2 teat now but the packet for the 3 does say 3 months + so he is getting near that. Will watch him more closely to see if it could be the teat. I was unsure how long a DF is meant to make them sleep? So if he has a 10.00 pm DF when should I expect him to wake for a feed? I guess I have been enjoying the sleep and not really paying enough attention.
The reason I had been starting his day later is because until the last week or so he was very unsettled in the night with wind and in pain before and when trumping and so he slept in and I was letting him. It was also making his naps awful as he was so tired and he was doing 30/45 min naps. These are not much better yet and he is often unsettled after 45mins and trumping. How long should he sleep for altogether now? How many naps, he is having 3 but not all same length. Try to make at least one of them 1 and half hrs and then the others are sometimes a 45 min and a 30 min unless we are out and about as he likes to sleep in the cot or car. DH says he hardly drinks on the second DF and I think if we can up his daytime intake may be able to drop that one.

[dizzy]

Checked my teats and he is already on the 3 months + teats the next are 6 months +, he can't be ready for them can he?

[Lolly]

Probably not yet, sometimes we find mums haven't thought to change from the first teats which is why we always suggest it just in case! How long is it taking him to drink his bottles and is he draining them?

How was last night?

Laura

[dizzy]

He is actually nearly draining a 150 ml bottle sometimes now but on other feeds only 100 ml. Today has been playing with the teat a lot. In the night he had a feed at 4.30 am and then woke at 7.10 am but when I gave him milk he drank a little bit and then fell asleep and didn't wake until nearly 9.00 am. He then didn't want milk really and played with the teat and drank about 80 ml.
If dh does a df at 11.00 ish when should I hope lo wakes for next feed?

[dizzy]

help, now it has got worse and dh says it serves me right for messing with something that did work! We have put df to just before 11 pm and on both nights has not drunk much 2nd night just 80 ml, 1st night dh did second df 20 mins later and he drank 3 oz but on 2nd night drank no more. !st night he woke at 2.48 and I managed to get him to go back for short while and fed at 3.40 am but 2nd night would not go back and had to feed in the end and then was chatting to me and wide awake and then didn't go back off until 4.30 am then when it came to next feed (6.40 am)he went back to sleep and wanted it 40 mins later and then went back to sleep straight after until 9.00 am.
How can I sort out this middle of the night waking? and extend after df?