can you tell me your 'rules' about trying food...

[*Becky*]

I am trying to work out what is reasonable with H regarding veg, well most food atm.

He has been the pickiest eater of veg for ever. I do ask him to try everything but he actually gags on most veg and I don't want to create a major issue.

So...what is reasonable? I really think he needs to eat veg, it is ridiculous but he won't. What are your expectations regarding food, trying food, how much you expect them to eat etc?

Kinda at my wits end.

[firsttimemummy]

If he gags could you mash them or something? If Murray doesn't like something I find that making it into a texture he likes helps - he didn't like melon, so I pureed and froze it into ice lollies (which he doesn't normally get, so like them as a treat!).  After a while he was used to the taste then would eat "normal" melon.

Murray is a good eater, so our rule is that he has to try things - he has to have even the tiniest bite, and if he still doesn't like it, he doesn't have to eat it (99/100 times he does like it and will then eat it).

I have to say, though, that I have noticed lately he isn't eating many veggies, but loves fruit.  Being this time of year, though, we tend to have soup every day for lunch so he gets his nutrients (he doesn't actually like "soup" but if I call it "vegetable smoothie" he will eat it )

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

What about raw veggies?  Spencer used to only eat corn, but now she loves carrot sticks, will sometimes eat broccoli, but only if it isn't cooked. She can't have dips, but my oldest used to love dipping anything in ranch dressing.

I don't really have a rule for trying things with Spencer, I just keep putting things on her plate and eventually she will try them (though it did take a whole year of putting roast pork on her plate to get her to taste it!)  She has alot of food/texture aversions though and this is what was recommended we do.  Honestly, if she even licks something I am happy!

[~Sara~]

We have a picky eater here, too.  Doesn't eat that many veggies but does a LOT better with them in a casserole.

Now that he's getting older, we stress the importance of trying ONE bite of the food.  If he doesn't like, we don't make it a negative thing, but we say thank you for trying it.  Can't force him to eat, ya know?

I like the other tips suggested above, too   DS won't eat broccoli raw or steamed by itself, but will if it's soft and mixed in a casserole.

[Mom to M&M]

Totally picky eater here too. I keep offering and trying but not pushing or forcing and meanwhile make things with veggies and meats incorporated - so pasta with bolognese and veggie sauce (and I tell him outright there is meat and carrots or whatever in there), chopped spinach on his pizza, etc. And he drinks homemade fruit smoothies with sometimes spinach added, sometimes avocado added, etc - and again I tell him that. And I offer an Ella's kitchen or Plum Baby veg/fruit pouch with every dinner (he has it maybe half the time) as well. Sometimes if I really want DS to try something and think he might I offer a small non-food related bribe, like singing a favorite song for him if he does or reading a small board book. That maybe works 25% of the time... It's hard!

[anna*]

Our rules are: Stan has to taste everything on his plate, and he's not allowed to say anything is 'yucky' (because someone spent time making the food for him). By 'taste', that doesn't mean he has to chew and swallow. If he's reluctant, we go through these steps together.
Look at the food - what colour is it
Sniff the food
Touch the food - is it hot/cold/hard/soft etc
Pick up a bit of the food and kiss it
Stick out his tongue and lick it
Put a piece of the food in his mouth and take it straight back out again.
Put a piece of the food in his mouth and eat it.

He has to get to the second last step (put it in his mouth and take it out again). If he's really reluctant, he doesn't have to put it in his mouth and eat it (but usually he does). We have done these steps about 100 times with broccoli, and he has just started to eat broccoli. Score. (Sigh that it took so long but hey).

We also have a song that we do from Yo Gabba Gabba, and if DH or I say we don't like something, we go through the taste steps too and try it. DH discovered he doesn't HATE yoghurt this way. This was actually great for Stan to see.

[~Sara~]

That's a really good plan, Anna, and we incorporate those steps, too.  We're at the sniffing/touching stage most of the time.  I figure a lot of it will come in time as our LOs get older and can be "reasoned" with more, like Stan can.  Always good to have a next step in mind!

[anna*]

Yeh I'm trying to remember when we first started to do the steps and insist on him tasting everything at a meal. I'm sure it was in place by the time he was 3.

[Lemonthyme]

My rules?  I suppose I don't really have any!  Should I?  My view is I offer a main meal option normally with veg and a mix usually unless it's something like bolognaise with hidden veg in it(!)  I just think he eats what he eats and he doesn't what he doesn't.  If he has a taste even if he rejects it, tbh, I think that's ok.  I always offer fruit as well so I have no fear he will suffer from a lack of vitamins as he rarely rejects fruit.

I suppose our one 'rule' at the moment (17 months) is he gets told it's wrong if he drops something but if he doesn't want it he can leave it on his tray or give it to me.  There's no telling off for not finishing things because I figure he's just regulating his appetite.

[anna*]

We had to institute rules about tasting because it was the stage when Stan would say 'I don't like it' without having tasted it - even things we KNEW he liked.

[squeakersmum]

I insist that Ben tries everything on his plate but if I'm eating something and I offer him a bite he obviously doesn't have to say yes - he often will though.

He's not keen on broccoli but if we have it I do insist he has one piece as he doesn't eat any other green veg and we often have broccoli.

If he tries and gags I'll leave it for a week or two and then give it to him again. He only has to try a little bit though.

There are some things that he really doesn't like - filled pasta for example - he really doesn't like the texture. So I may try in a few months.

[Shiv52]

Now that he's getting older, we stress the importance of trying ONE bite of the food.  If he doesn't like, we don't make it a negative thing, but we say thank you for trying it.  Can't force him to eat, ya know?

This was our rule.  She has to try it at the very least.  One bite of each type of food. 

Its actually going really well here now. The irony is tonight at dinner M ate her corn, mushrooms and beans and didn't eat the flipping lasagne.  And i wasn't impressed and then thought that i am NEVER happy!!!

[Nauvoo]

I love Anna's advice.  I've actually been privileged to read it before on previous posts and I've put it to use with me DD.  Works great for her and she's been much more likely to try foods now than I ever hoped she would be.
thanks for the advice Anna, it's worked for us!

[anna*]

thanks for the advice Anna, it's worked for us!

So pleased! I can't take the credit for it, I'm sure I saw it on a TV show here about terribly picky eaters. The child psychologist had the kids going through similar steps (there may have been more I can't remember) but the aim was that by the time the child was putting the food in their mouth, they were already familiar with it in lots of ways ie the look, smell (which is after all a lot of the 'taste'), the temperature, the texture - rather than taking a totally new and unfamiliar food and being asked to eat it.

[Erin M]

Brilliant idea Anna!
I thought I had replied the other day, guess my post is flying about cyber space at the moment. 

Anyway, I have a super picky 6 year old and a somewhat picky 4 year old.  Our rules have been for years that they have to have a vegetable with dinner and they have to try everything that we're having.  We will sometimes eat veggies that the girls don't like, so they have to try a bite of ours (they have to swallow now, when they were smaller, they were allowed to spit it out) and if they don't like it they can pick another vegetable from what we have on hand.  The girls both eat raw carrots and raw peppers, so I always have one of those and that's what they eat instead.  I'm honestly surprised that Katie isn't somewhat orange from the number of carrots that she eats, but she does eat vegetables every day.  They also have slowly expanded their horizons over the years -- Katie does eat broccoli now as well as lettuce, cucumbers, and maybe something else that I'm missing.  Allie loves tomatoes and corn and claimed she liked green beans the other day, but then refused to eat them when I cooked her some. 

The girls both are very willing to try pretty much anything and we're hopeful they'll eventually broaden their food horizons -- dh and I were super picky kids as well and we now eat a good variety of foods. 

[Tweakster]

We don't make him try it and have no rules about food.  DH and I are both very very sensitive and picky eaters and grew up being forced by our parents and society/friends and really really resented it - still do!  It wasn't the one bite rule like Anna has though.  Ours was sat at the table until the food was gone or whatever.

He's a great eater when he's hungry so when he won't try something we know a) he's not hungry or b) he just doesn't like the look/smell of it, in which case fine.  We still continue to offer the said food though.  He's not getting off that easily lol  He'll see it on his plate again and again and one day we're pretty sure he'll try it.  We also don't provide alternative meals.  If he rejects the dinner that's made, that's it.  He gets his fruit like always and some milk before bed and he has to make do with that.

[speechie]

Quote from: ~Sara~ on October 14, 2011, 03:57:20 PM
Now that he's getting older, we stress the importance of trying ONE bite of the food.  If he doesn't like, we don't make it a negative thing, but we say thank you for trying it.  Can't force him to eat, ya know?
This was our rule.  She has to try it at the very least.  One bite of each type of food.

OK- so I've got a GREAT eater, but I can share that when he has a fussy day, we have one rule- he really needs to take a 'no thank you' bite. Basically just to be polite and try each food. I got that verbage from his preschool.