Please help with sleeping at daycare

[aidenmc]

So DS who is now 15 mo will only sleep for 40 minutes at daycare. He has been sick and teething lately but I am pretty certain that is not the problem. The longest he has slept there is an hour. At home his typical nap would be 1.5hr, longer if catching up, shorter if OT. I am starting to accept that this is all he may ever do.

Bedtime is generally between 6 and 6:30 and he's up between 5:30 and 6. I can't seem to shift his day later (I'm afraid to puch too much given the short naps). Does anyone have any suggestions?

[Tweakster]

Is he at daycare every day?  When did he start daycare?  What does his day look like there?  What are the sleeping conditions?

[clairebear79]

Becky we had this when my O started at daycare in September.  He would only sleep 30 or 40mins & that was it all day. 

In the baby room (0-2YO) they have cribs in the same room as all the other kids who are playing & they just pull a curtain across to segregate the areas, but of course its still light & noisy.  O just isn't used to sleeping like that at home.  Also I discovered they were standing at the end of the crib until he settled to sleep, which again, we don't do at home. 

The toddler room (2-3YO) has its own separate blacked out nursery for naptime, so I asked them if they would put him down for naps in there instead & just PD & leave him to it.  Oh & not to get him straight up if he woke mid nap - but give him a chance to resettle.  They are now doing this & his naps have improved massively, in fact last week he slept 2.75hrs there!  I also send his sleeping bag & teddy that he has at home which makes him feel more secure.

[aidenmc]

Samuel is at a home daycare. He's there at most 4 full days a week but up till now he would have maybe 3.5 days a week there. I think starting next week it will be 4 full days full time. He sleeps in her daughters' room in a playpen. I know he can sleep in one of those because he did when we were on vacation last summer. Its dark in the room and we even sent over a copy of his lullaby music that is played throughout the sleep. He is usually put down at about 12:15 which is comparable to home. I think she does go back in occasionally to resettle him if he's crying hard. I send over a blanket from his crib and whatever soft toy(s) he is currently interested in. He doesn't really have a lovey for comfort but I send those things anyway.

At home I do nurse him but in another room and before the wind down in his room. He doesn't always get that as I am away teaching Wednesday nights and DH puts him down. He has no trouble there. I really don't think it's the nursing that's the problem and I would really hate to stop nursing at this point. He has generally adjusted to being there although over the last couple of weeks things have been rough due to a couple of colds, ear infection and teething. Also he had an extra long weekend at home for Thanksgiving and he's cried each  time I dropped him off this week.

[Bex09]

Hi Becky, just to say you are not alone! We are exactly the same here and C only sleeps about 40 mins all day long at nursery. At home she does between 2 and 3 hours, at nursery her worst yet has been 10 mins!!! Luckily she only goes for 2 days so she can catch up the rest of the week at home. C is just too nosy and the minute one of the other children makes a noise or wakes up, etc then that is it she is up and wanting to play! I am hoping it will get better but it has been 6 weeks now, so I doubt it.

[~*~Little Miss Sunshine~*~]

I have no advice but also wanted to say we are in the same boat!!  DD goes to day care 4 days a week - started about 6 weeks ago and has only twice slept for more than 30 minutes   She's usually a good napper at home.  They don't have a quiet dark spot for her to sleep so I am sure that has a lot to do with it.  It is very frustrating so I feel your pain!

[aidenmc]

Wow, well I guess I'm glad it's fairly common but not glad you are both going through it too. It definitely is frustrating especially as he will now be going 4 days a week. We've been at it about 6 weeks as well. I wonder if the only answer is to accept that he will have to have a 6 pm bedtime all week and that I will need to be on the lookout for creeping OT.

It would just be nice to be able to shift his BT and WU because I could really use another 1/2 hour's sleep in the morning.

[Tweakster]

Becky you'll be able to shift the day as he gets a bit older.  They have to grow into longer days.  Plus at the moment he's had teething and illness along with big change, that throws most kids for a loop.  Is Samuel Spirited?

We were very lucky that Finn slept really well at daycare, they had a room full of baby travel cots and it was dark and quiet (when the other kids were sleeping).  In the toddler room at 18 mths he went to sleeping on a small folding cot in the main playroom with all the other kids.  It wasn't dark at all and it was noisy because many kids didn't sleep.  His nap was variable in that room.  Now he's at a home daycare where he sleeps on a folding cot in her son's room - half the time he's kicking her out and telling her to close the door so he can nap lol

6 weeks is actually a short time.  It took F quite a few months to cope with daycare and even then he had some 'off' days.  He was in 5 days a week though so it's great that you have a couple of catch up days.  One thing we did was move the nap back to 11:30 and it really helped get him through the rough OT.

[aidenmc]

Thanks Wendy. I am hoping that he eventually settles down better there. I do know that 6 weeks is a short time for such a big adjustment especially with all the illness, teething.

Do you move the nap to 11:30 on all days? I would just worry that he'd be up by 12:10 at daycare.

[~*~Little Miss Sunshine~*~]

See, when DS2 is in daycare, they darken his room, play some music and all the kids sleep!!  I know this stage won't last forever - I just have my fingers crossed that it doesn't start affecting her night sleep.  She is usually asleep by 6:45 pm (I'd make it earlier but I don't get home until close to 6 pm and she needs to take her reflux meds 30 mins before her meal) and I usually have to get her up around 6:15 am so we can be out the door by 6:30!  Not much room for changes

[aidenmc]

At least she is sleeping till 6:15. We rarely get a wakeup that late. Often he will wake at about 5 and will doze off an on till 6 if we are lucky. It is so tricky feeding them with those reflux, meds, I know. I am at least glad that we are over all that. I know I should be thankful, and your post has reminded me of that. We had such a rough time with reflux, gas and poor (no, terrible!) sleep, then all the AP issues that go along with that. I am just reminding my self now how often I used to think about his stomach, reflux, what and when he was being fed, etc.

So, I guess in the grand scheme of things I shouldn't complain. But I know it takes a toll on him not having decent naps...

[~*~Little Miss Sunshine~*~]

At least she is sleeping till 6:15.

Oh yes!  For this I am very thankful!  DS1 was a chronic EWer so I feel your pain!!

But no matter what your situation, it's hard when things aren't going the way they would if you were home.  I feel bad for DD because she WANTS to sleep she just can't.  It certainly changes her personality - she's usually such a happy baby but when I get her from day care she's just so miserable.

[aidenmc]

Yeah, I feel the same. Yesterday he slept 2 hours, today 1hr45. In fact I was out for a walk with him and he actually dozed off just before 11, even though he's slept from about 7 to 6 (with a short NW at 4:45). Luckily I think he was only out a couple of minutes before I noticed and woke him and he still had a good nap (was so afraid he'd skip it).

But I know that for the next 4 days he will not sleep well and I know it's not helping him to fight off these colds he keeps getting. I am really hating the thought of him being miserable there this week. Last week wasn't great and I'm hoping that it's just because he wasn't feeling too well. It just makes it hard to go to work.

[~*~Little Miss Sunshine~*~]

I can totally relate!! Sending loads of (((Hugs))) - hope your LO is feeling better soon.  I had to pick DD up early today because she had a fever.  She's had a runny nose for 3 weeks now The joys of day care eh?

[aidenmc]

Anne, our lo's must have been talking to each other. I had just stepped into my office when the daycare provider called to get me to pick him up as he's spiked a fever. Only 99 but she wanted him picked up anyway. I could hear him wailing away in the background so I could tell he wasn't too happy. Ended up going to the doctor to check him out as he's had a rash over his whole body for 4 days and has been breaking out in hives as well. We have had teething, a cold then ear infection then another cold and this! It is certainly not making this adjustment to daycare any easier!