Questions to ask and what to look for - Childminder

[Hedgehog17]

Hi ladies,

Just about to launch ourselves into the unknown territory of placing DS with a childminder...

He is currently in nursery where he's been for over 2 months, but he's not happy there, he can't sleep there because the cots are in the same room as the activities and it's too busy, noisy and bright, and I'm not happy with the staff to babies ratio (It's supposed to be 1:3 but often isn't due to staff absence etc. and the kids are often left to wail  )

So, anyone with any experience, please would you guide me on what to look for when visiting, and the kinds of questions I should ask a childminder?

I think DS will be much happier in a quieter setting that is more like home. I will be happier if he isn't picking up every germ that's going and passing it to me, I can actually manage to get to work for more than a couple of hours 3 days a week which isn't enough to keep a small business afloat, and my heart isn't broken every time I leave him and he's clinging to me and crying 

We have 2 visits to childminders lined up for Monday, so I have to get my lists sorted out asap!

Many thanks in advance 

[anna*]

I guess it's just about working out what are your priorities and asking questions about that. For example, if he will b e having meals, ask what a typical lunch/breakfast would be. Is the TV on in the house - and if so when and for how long. How does the CM handle behaviour like hitting and/or biting in a toddler. If she uses local playgroups, how often, if she organises outside play, does she have pets etc...
Does that give you some ideas to start with?

[Bryony's mum]

Anna has some good suggestions.  Some things I asked about: how does the CM discipline? where will LO nap? what if they won't go to sleep by themselves? what other children will be there?  will there be any other adults in the house?  what is the daily routine like?  how will my LO's naps and meals fit with that?  what toys and activities will be available?  How does the CM settle new children in?

When I was visiting I noticed the overall atmosphere, what the other minded children were doing, how the CM interacted with my LO etc.  Also how they responded to what I said about LO - whether they respected my opinions and would accommodate my requests.  Could we have a good working relationship?

Tbh, both times I chose a childminder, the decision made itself.  First time there was only a choice of two.  The first one I saw had a house covered in dog hair and had only been looking after her own grandson.  She was in the middle of decorating so had her furniture piled up in a corner and didn't speak to my LO at all.  The second one had a clean well organised house, with two little girls sitting at the table eating lunch quietly.  She had contracts etc ready to show me, and was interested in my LO.  Easy choice!

second time, I ruled out the one with a yappy dog that frightened dd, and the one who said that she would sit a misbehaving child in a dark corridor to rethink their behaviour.  The one we chose seemed to genuinely like my LOs.

All the best for Monday

[*Ali*]

I would definitely want to know how many other children she would be looking after, how old they were and whether she has to do school runs with them and how she would transport them. I have seen childminders who look after 4-6 children and are run off their feet, they walk to drop other children off at school and pick them up 2 or 3 times a day and have too many children to safely watch near roads IMO. Also important is how your DS's naps would fit around school runs and scheduled activities like play groups she plans to use.
Personally I would also want to know whether she is caring for her own children and consider if she would as good a job for my child as she would her own or would her own child(ren) be her priority.
I would also ask about discipline, does she use time out, punitive punishments etc.?
How would she settle your DS for naps and where would they be? If he needs help (as he probably would in an unfamiliar place) would she have the time and motivation to do it? e.g. BW or CIO etc.?
What types of activities would she be doing with them every day?
What arrangements/costs are there for her taking annual leave?

I don't even use a CM but see lots of them who use the play group I run and these are the questions I wonder about.

[Bryony's mum]

Depends what you want when you send your LO to a childminder, but the CM having their own children there, and taking your child on school runs isn't generally a negative.  I was worried about that first time round, but it was really nice for dd, as suddenly had older 'siblings' to play with.  Her schedule inevitably had to change to fit in with school runs, but actually it worked out really well, and we changed her schedule on days at home to fit with the CM's.

[Hedgehog17]

Thank you ladies 

We saw 2 CMs yesterday, have 2 more on Friday and 2 next week.

I have a long list of questions which I refer to at the end, to see if anything crucial has been missed, and am doing a lot of observing!

I'm also going by DS's reactions as well 

So far, he was a completely different child at each place - the first one he didn't settle, clung to me and wasn't interested in the toys. He then had a meltdown when she wouldn't let him play with the door  (He opens and closes doors all the time at home!)

At the second one he was happy to leave me and got stuck into the toys, and even held out his arms to the CM when I picked him up to leave, and was happy to go for a cuddle with her  She was much closer to my approach to everything and more laid back with the kids.

So, one 'no' and one 'definite maybe', 4 to go....

[Bryony's mum]

Well done!  Glad you found one that you would consider using - although maybe one of the others will be even better! 

[Hedgehog17]

Great news for us on the childcare - we have given our month's notice at nursery and he's starting with a lovely childminder on Monday  After he stops going to nursery he'll be going to her Mon, Tue & Wed from 10am to 5pm, so I'll be able to keep my part-time job and increase my hours enough to keep the business afloat  In the meantime he's doing Mondays only with the CM and 3 afternoons at the nursery (about 2.5 / 3 hrs each) which should just about let me get my work done if I do some at home too! Our new CM has a DD just a little younger than DS so they are on the same routine which is brilliant. She's really nice, well organised, and has a cat and 6 chickens plus two olders DSs who are at school. My DS really likes it there so I think he'll be happy and settle in quickly. Feeling very relieved 

Many thanks everyone for your input and support 

[Bryony's mum]

Yay!  It's such a relief when you find the right person! 

[Hedgehog17]

  Fabulous news 

Had a text from the CM to say he'd gone to sleep there  Apparently it took a while but he was down by midday 

Very very relieved