Screaming before naps

[JessSilver]

I am new on the boards and have just read BW, and am trying to implement the EASY routine, however I'm having so many problems with my 10 week olds naps that it throws off my attempt at EASY.  I'm hoping someone can help me figure his naps out so I can get EASY going.  Here's where I'm at with him...
10 weeks old, EBF, and currently going to sleep about 7PM and sleeps to 7 or 8 AM with 2 feedings in between.  I can not get him to nap during the day, and if I do it's only 10-20 minutes or so.  He gets sooooo OT and cranky that by the time we do his night routine he's so OT that he screams for a good 30 minutes before essentially "passing out".  I have bad habits in place to get him to sleep that I would like to work on, but he's so cranky by the end of the day from not napping I rock/bounce him while shushing.  I have been trying the last couple days to be very alert to his tired signs and once he's yawning try and put him down for a nap.  Once I lay him down he'll look around wide eyed for anywhere between 5 and 10 minutes and then screams!  It all goes downhill from there, and I basically spend my entire day trying to get him down for a nap until the evening comes and he passes out again.  I need HELP!!!

[kerry,(kaceys mum)]

Hi and welcome to the boards!xxx

I'll try give you some advice but hopfully one of the nap mods will come along and help you soon!x

Can you post your daily routine???

The only advice I can give at the moment is that your baby won't know how to go to sleep on its own,,,hence the reason why when youput him down to sleep he screams,,,,he needs his prop to sleep,,,,, wether that be you feeding,,rocking,,,walking him to sleep. At 10weeks,,,,it should only take a few days to work the problem out,,,,and I would do the prop problem,,and the nap problem together because their going to overlap anyway!x

Post your daily routine for us to see!xxx

[JessSilver]

Right now he wakes up for the day and eats at appx: 6:45-7AM, I feed him which is 15-20 minutes, change his diaper/dress him, then bring him out to "play".  I will usually put him on his play mat that has a mirror above it and a couple toys and he will bat and kick around.  this is typically only about 15 minutes, and around 8 or so he starts yawning and I try to put him to bed.  It normally takes about a half hour/forty five minutes to get him to sleep...rocking, patting, bouncing and occassionally another nursing session.  If he does sleep at all it's only about 20 minutes and he's up again by 9.
He'll be ready to nurse again, another 15-20 minutes.  This routine goes on for the rest of the day, with him rarely sleeping for even the 20 minutes he did in the morning. 
About 5:15 I start his bedtime routine:  bath, diaper, pj's, I'll sing to him while I bring him into our room, turn on the fan and shut off the lights.  Commense the screaming.  this is usually around 6, and he will typically fall asleep by 7.
During the night he'll wake up to feed at about 1AM, 4AM, then the waking eat at 6:45-7.  When he wakes up to feed in the night he will eat in about 15 minutes and goes right back down.
Today we are really trying to get him to go down every time he looks tired even if that means he screams while we hold him and pat him without rocking/bouncing etc., and aren't giving in with that or bringing him out into the living room to play like we've done in the past.  It is taking anywhere between a half hour or longer to get him down, and the longest he's slept is 23 minutes.  I'm exhausted!

[kerry,(kaceys mum)]

I got this from one of the easy boards,,,,,

8-12 weeks Sample Routines

Key notes:  
*Average Awake time at 2 months:  1 hour and 15 - 20 mins  
*This is the age that moms find that their baby's routines become a little more stable.
* There were several routines that still had an awake time of one hour. It was by far the most common awake time. However, I have tried to include a wide range of awake times. The second most common awake time was 1h15m.  

A)  
Awake time: 1 hour
Naps: 2x2, 2x1.5
Total daytime sleep:  7 hours
Total nighttime sleep: 11 hours (minus the dream feed and 1 night feed)

This was Liana's schedule from about 2 months to 3or 4 months

E - 7am
A
S- 8am

E - 10am
A
S - 11am

E - 1pm
A
S - 2pm

E - 3:30pm
A
S - 4:30

E - 6pm
A
E - 7:30pm
S - 8pm

E - 10:30
E - 3 or 4 (sometimes)

Posted by janelle on June 15, 2004

B)  
Awake time: 1h15m-1h45m
Naps: 2x 1.75, 1x1, 1x 45m
Total daytime sleep:  5h15m
Total nighttime sleep: 11h45m (minus the dream feed, 1 night feed, and one night waking)

Here's Emily's schedule at 8 weeks...

E:  7 - 7:30
A:  7:30 - 8:15
S:  8:15 - 10

E:  10:00 - 10:30
A:  11:15 - 11:45
S: 11:45 - 12:45

E: 1:00 -1:30
A: 1:30 - 2:15
S: 2:15 - 3:30 (Grumpy time.. usually unsettled)

E: 4:00- 4:30
A: 4:30 - 5:15
S: 5:15  - 6:00

E: 6.00 - 6.30
A: 6.30 - 6:45 Bath with Daddy
S  6:45 (settling for about 30 mins) - 11.00

DF: 11:00

Then she is waking around 3 am and we are shh patting and paci till about 5-5.30.. then a feed.

Posted by: Emilys_mum on September 05, 2005

C)  
Awake time: 1h45m - 2 hours
This is decent sample of what a routine between 3 hours and 4 hours might look like.
Naps: 2x1.75, 1x1.5
Total daytime sleep:  5 hours
Total nighttime sleep: 11.5

This was Joey's schedule at 12 weeks old:  Now I don't wake him in the morning so it could shift 1/2 hour in either direction.

E 7:30 a.m.
A
S 9:15-11:00

E 11:00
A
S 12:45-2:30

E 2:30
A
S 4:30

E 6:00
A Bath
E 7:30
S 8:00

Start over  

Posted by Carmela's Mom on August 23, 2006

To reference the routines these were compiled from use this link: Sample EASY routines, 0-3 months
« Last Edit: January 24, 2010, 06:06:16 PM by she

[kerry,(kaceys mum)]

By looking at your daily routine,,,,,, and the EASY one that I got from the boards it looks like your lo is having to much awake time,,,,,that will make him OT,,,,,, and then its just a constant circle for you all day long of a ot mess,,, no wonder your exausted!xxx

Do you think you could try and easy routine lije the one that's posted? There is more help on those boards at the top,,like stickys of questions and ancers!x

But the props are going to have to be tackled to,,,,so I would also look at the sshh/pat boards too.

Please remember that we have all been there,,,, oi had to do sshh/pat with my dd's,,, and pu/pd,,, I was the queen of props,,,, I bf mine to sleep,,,,co- sleeped you name it,,,,,but I can honestly say the sshh/ pat does work to get rid of the props,,,,, my dd first night tool 2 hours of torture,,,,the second night was 20 min and then the 3rd night we were there,,,,, we did this at night for bedtime and during day for naps. The only thing I'd say is see when it works,,,, and your lo becomes sleep trained,,, don't do what I did and fall back down the prop road again,,,,,or you have to start over again,,,,not so much fun the next time!xx

[JessSilver]

Thanks for all the examples!  I am finding that he is wanting to eat about every 2 hours during the day which is making putting him on EASY a little difficult!  I don't know if it's because he goes such a long stretch at the begining of his bedtime (7-1) without eating and is making up for the calories during the day?  Today I have been trying to delay his feedings about 10-15 minutes in hopes of stretching them out, and he has gone along with that so far.  I didn't know if I was hurting him by letting him sleep during the night for so long (about 12 hours), is that OK at his age (10weeks)?

[kerry,(kaceys mum)]

No way will you be hurting him,, he's a baby who need his sleep,,,, and. He is waking at around 1am for a feed also,,,,

Do you do a dream feed??? I'm just thinking if you do the dream feed that maybe he won't even wake at 1am and he will sleep right through.

Brest fed babies tend to not to be that great on streching from a 3 hour easy to a 4 hour easy as most bottle fed babies are but the way your doing it to get to a 3 hour easy sounds fab to me,,by extending it by 15 min each time.

TRy to remeber that your ov doing a very good job with your lo,,,,,you've breastfed for 10 weeks,,,you've got him down to one night wakening,,, and the rest will come with a few tweeks,,,, but it will be so worth it in the end!x 

The trick is to get the milk in during the daytime hours so he doesn't wake at night for a feed,,, but your lo is doing very well for 10 weeks through the night but I would try the dream feed to see if that does away with his one night wakening.

[JessSilver]

Thanks again for the the help.  The screaming is just about sending my DH and I over the edge!  He is nearly screaming through the entire nap period up until he is due for another feed.  Please tell me there won't be too many days like this, my DH goes back to work Monday and then I'm on my own all day again! 

[kerry,(kaceys mum)]

Honestly,,,, your baby is young enough so it shouldn't take to long....mine was fixed on the 3rd day,,,, but like I said I got into a bad habbit of when I had the problem fixed,,,I fell back into the prop,,,silly really!x

Can you go into the props boards and see how to do sshh/pat properly??? You know you have a problem with props,,,,,,so my idvice would be to remove the prop,,then try extend the nap times,,,,but I think that with your lo being on the correct EASY for his age,,,this will mean he won't be OT,,,,,,then if you remove the prop,,,,he will be able so slef sooth,,,so he won't be OT and that will extend nap times.

[kerry,(kaceys mum)]

Please remember there stickys at the top of the boards for help,,,,,,like on here there's sticky advice for extending naps,,,,how to do sshh/ pat corectly,,,,there's the easy boards with great sticky advice,,,and the props boards have the same.

If you have any questions,,,,just post,,,,there's some fab ladies on here with really great advice,,,,I'm sure you will love this site,,, and remember we are all here because we found the babywhisperer book and have all had issues with our lo's so don't let it get you down.

But my dd's are testament that this actually does work,,,,,it taskes a bit of effort at the start but I can promise that you will see the benifits quickly,,, leaving you with plenty of Y time,,,my kids are fab sleepers,,,,all thanks to this site and the babywhisperer books and I'm sure your lo will be too!x

Kerry

[Gemmahart81]

Hi, I am familiar with the BW principals and have utilised many of them with success when overcoming sleep hurdles with my 6.5 month old daughter.  I am however, at a complete loss when it comes to napping when I'm out and about and wonder if anyone has advice they could give me PLEASE!

My DD now sleeps well at night, falling to sleep peacefully and shows some ability to self soothe as she only wakes once a night for feeding then returns straight back to sleep.  Likewise, if I am home in the day, she has pretty obvious sleep cues, so I can pop her in her cot and she will go off after about 5 mins of peaceful babbling. 

My problem comes whenever I am out, either in town, or at other peoples houses.  When she is tired, she screams and screams before eventually passing out after about 30 mins. Then she will only catnap for 20-30 mins. I am assuming she is overstimulated and struggling to wind down, but I have tried all the obvious things, like taking her somewhere quiet, giving her the blanket she sleeps with a night, ignoring her, even rocking her (which I never do at home) but no joy, and she has been like this for months now.

Now don't get me wrong, I am grateful that my DD sleeps well generally, but I get really down if when I'm house bound, and my nerves are shot taking her out anywhere as I know the screaming will come when she's tired.  Just wonder if anyone else suffers with this, or can offer any experience to help her.

She is on a 4 hours EASY and has been on solids since 4 months.