Running around when he should be sleeping

[rach321]

DS1 has just turned 3 and for the last few weeks has spent at least 20minutes running around in the dark after he's been put to bed. He doesn't want anything just thinks its fun! If I go up every time I hear him get out of bed then that turns it into a game and he gets more and more worked up - cue more and more running around!  I don't really mind that he's not asleep but he shares a room with his brother who is 1 now and it's not fair that DS2's sleep gets disturbed - luckily he's textbook and will put himself back to sleep but that's beside the point.
Any ideas? We talk about how we have to be quiet after lights out now and not wake up DS2 and not run around etc but he still does it. I've tried taking away treats etc but he still does it.  He's going through a phase where he says that things are coming to get him and that there are things in his bed (usually owls?!) so I wonder if that's got something to do with it. I should probably add that he's very spirited and has been in a BBB since he was 18months old so its not like its a new thing. Anyone BTDT?

[deb]

Is he still napping during the day?

[rach321]

Mostly no but he will occasionally have an hour during the day. He does it whether he naps or not.

[Roseii]

Hiya, have you tried a gro clock? Doesn't keep dd quiet but it does keep her in bed! Also sometimes I have to have a chat with her in the daytime about feeling safe and not scared in bed, it usually involves picking a special toy to keep her safe. Might that work?

[rach321]

Got a groclock and it works a treat in the morning but has no effect in the evening!

[deb]

Longer evening winddown? Can he help with DS2's winddown? Might be more invested in it then

[Roseii]

So what's your routine sleep wise?

[rach321]

Routine is a bit like this

6am wake up
If he naps he will usually sleep for about an hour somewhere between 12 and 2
7pm bedtime but he's usually running around till almost 8
He's complaining he's tired during the day but yet doesn't want to sleep at night! He goes to nursery 3 days a week - they don't have a nap at preschool and he usually falls asleep on the way home! He will get a max of 15minutes on nursery days - traffic depending!!

[deb]

When J was nap-dropping, any time she had a smidgen of sleep during the day, bedtime ALWAYS ended up being later. She just couldn't sleep, even after a 5minute power nap on the way home from the grocery store. and Heaven help us if the nap was late in the day.

It sounds like he might be getting a second wind. Any chance of putting him to bed before he gets wound up again? Or keeping the evening super-low-key? Our rule for a long time was that after 6PM/after supper things were to be low-key: no wrestling with Daddy (took DH a while to get that one and then I let him put J to bed after those and he FINALLY got the idea that winding her up didn't work *facepalm*), no running around, quiet volume. Even now I try to get the girls to keep from getting a second wind if I want any hope of some Me time in the evenings. The massage at bedtime really seems to help, as does some quiet music to help set the mood.

[rach321]

Thanks deb I will give that a try. 45minutes last night before he finally settled down!

[Roseii]

When J was nap-dropping, any time she had a smidgen of sleep during the day, bedtime ALWAYS ended up being later. She just couldn't sleep, even after a 5minute power nap on the way home from the grocery store. and Heaven help us if the nap was late in the day.

This is exactly the case here, seriously 10 mins in the car=3 hours added onto b/t

[Shiv52]

Quote from: deb on Today at 11:37:27 AM
When J was nap-dropping, any time she had a smidgen of sleep during the day, bedtime ALWAYS ended up being later. She just couldn't sleep, even after a 5minute power nap on the way home from the grocery store. and Heaven help us if the nap was late in the day.

This is exactly the case here, seriously 10 mins in the car=3 hours added onto b/t

This was us here too.  It got to the stage where even a 5 minute nap made bedtime ridiculously silly.  ANd then she'd be up late and have a short night and then be totally OT the next night at bedtime so get that second wind Deb is talking about even earlier and couldn't settle and so on. 

I wonder if stopping the nap totally will help?  Here it being totally dropped has made bedtime much more consistent with no nonsense.

[rach321]

I do try and not let him nap but if he falls asleep in the car on the way home from nursery - I try my best to keep him talking/ keep shaking his legs etc but he still falls asleep. This afternoon we were having a cuddle on the sofa and he just fell asleep right beside me - no amount of talking to him or stirring him gently would wake him up.  I won't wake him abruptly from sleep because that will lead to an hour plus of tantrum - its really not worth it! Even since he was tiny he is a monster if he is woken from sleep!

[Shiv52]

Its a vicious cycle!  Charli and I were having this conversation for months weren't we?   How sometimes you let them sleep and enjoy the peace and don't want to deal with the strop but then at 10pm you are cursing yourself for not just pushing through but a week later there we were again!   It does take a while for them to adjust to not napping and it was an horrendous few weeks here but much better now she is used to not napping.  For the car journeys home I actually moved her seat into the front beside me and kept windows down and brought a treat. 

Would he lie and listen to music to help him relax enough to fall asleep?

[rach321]

probably not - he's not really into music or noise while he sleeps, I even had to wean his brother off white noise since I knew they would soon be sharing a room! Its a nightmare and I don't know what to do for the best - he's obviously still a bit tired but then we get the bedtime faffing!