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Author Topic: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated  (Read 2686 times)

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Offline *Jo*

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Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« on: December 06, 2011, 08:27:00 am »
Levi takes about half an hour to feed. he only feeds in a particular position and he cant have any distractions. no one else can feed him but me because no one else knows how to do it. he doesnt feed in the regular position, i have to lay him on his side across my lap with his head on a pillow, so he feeds on his side and thats pretty much the only way he will feed. if he feeds in any other position he simply will not eat, he clams his mouth shut or squirms and wriggles his head and body in different directions. Ive seen people try to feed him and they cannot believe it, my Dad is at a loss because he likes to try and help by feeding him.

he takes roughly half an hour to feed, the problem being that he takes so long and it gets cold, he wont drink it when its cold so I have to reheat it in boiling water, while we wait for that it starts to get thicker (added to the bottle at the beginning of the feed) so then he gets lazy about drinking any faster, he doesnt really have a good seal around the teat, he kind of just looks like a fish sucking on it. he can get a good seal but he doesnt always do this and sometimes hes not even sucking, hes just 'mouthing'
my friend thought he mightve had tongue tie so I took him to the dr and he ssaid theres nothing wrong with his mouth or tongue, its all anatomically correct and no tongue tie, its just the way he feeds. so anyway, we get 20mins into the feed and the bottle is cold again so I heat it up again because hes refusing it. as soon as its warm again he will eat but of course by this time hes just not that interested.

Its infuriatingly frustrating!!!! I feed him every 4 hours, if i try to feed him less then it takes longer and most of the time he will not even really take it. Im really needing some help with this because it would be nice to be able to leave him with someone else so they can feed him.

why is he so difficult to feed?
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Offline Lolly

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #1 on: December 09, 2011, 12:24:41 pm »
It could be the reflux, or learnt behaviour because of the reflux pain.

I don't really know what to suggest other  than different flow teats or different style of bottle/ teat if you haven't tried anything else :-\.

Laura
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Offline firsttimemummy

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #2 on: December 09, 2011, 13:02:36 pm »
have you tried a faster flowing teat?
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Offline *Jo*

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #3 on: December 09, 2011, 17:58:46 pm »
Tried all teat sizes and bottles. I've wasted so much money doing this. Money I didn't have to spend in the first place
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atlantamomofthree

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #4 on: December 09, 2011, 20:15:37 pm »
I'm sorry you're having such a time of it!  :-\

Could you wrap the bottle in something to insulate it so it stays warm longer? Here you can buy small sheets of felt at the grocery store or craft store and I've made snugglies for our water bottles with it. If you don't want to make something though, you could always just take a burp cloth and wrap the bottle in it and then rubber band it in place.  ;) ((hugs))
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Offline Shiv52

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #5 on: December 09, 2011, 20:24:17 pm »
Could you make 2 bottles? So halve the feed and leave one in hot water so you can just swap it over when the othe gets cold?
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Offline londonlady

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #6 on: December 09, 2011, 20:42:33 pm »
I'd definitely buy a cheap thermal sheath and the 2nd bottle ^^ idea is a good one. My son was a fairly fast eater, but he would not carry on feeding if it wasn't warm enough, it was always a race against time until I bought a thermal sheath.

Would Levi be likely to go on hunger strike if someone else didn't feed him the right way? Not just the 1st attempt, but over a slightly longer period? Obviously you don't want to distress him, but could you be out of sight but in the house while your dad attempts to feed him? It would be useful to see where it goes-  if Levi refuses, would he eventually relent (even if it's after another hour or so, would hunger win out?) At least if you're there you are on hand if he gets really upset or gets to an agreed time without having fed...? Don't know if that's practical / realistic - just thinking out loud... ???

Rach. x
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Offline *Jo*

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #7 on: December 10, 2011, 05:56:43 am »
ok, now that we have a different thickener its not such an issue about it being cold because i can just pop it back in a jug of hot water and warm it up while burping him. i couldnt do that before because the thickener got thicker and thicker until it was too thick to come out of the teat. now thats not happening.

Dad tries to feed him alot. I always leave them alone and Dad perseveres but I can tell hes getting annoyed by it. I let him feed him tonight and it took 30mins to get 100mls into him and it had been 4 hours since his feed so he shouldve been hungry. Of course I fed him 3 hours later before bed and he polished off 200mls in 10mins! so he can do it, hes just not doing it. he gets very easily distracted. I would let Dad do every feed but hes getting annoyed with Levi taking so long (as am I ) and I dont want to put that on him.

also Ive noticed if hes really really hungry (like famished!) he will eat in the normal position!!! but he has to be pretty desperate to eat like that, he will also eat like that with the DF however he does take in more air in that position
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Offline *Kara*

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #8 on: December 10, 2011, 21:46:23 pm »
Quote from: *Jo* on December 09, 2011, 21:56:43 pm
also Ive noticed if hes really really hungry (like famished!) he will eat in the normal position!!! but he has to be pretty desperate to eat like that, he will also eat like that with the DF however he does take in more air in that position

Jo - this makes me think it's a learned behaviour that you can break with some persistence.  I would push him to 4 hrs 15 mins before offering a feed in a normal position... Being on his side is not only a PITA - but it will increase his risk for an ear infection.
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Offline creations

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #9 on: December 10, 2011, 22:12:19 pm »
Refluxers tend to find the BT and DF bottle less painful so I'm not surprised he manages a larger quantity in a shorter time at the bed time feed.
My DS has only ever taken 200ml on a handful of occasions in 11 months.  Often times he would only take 30 or 60 ml which was very worrying and I had to feed every 3 hrs up to 6 months, but he almost always managed between 120 and 180ml at the BT and DF when it was less painful.  You're not a alone in worrying about milk intake and feeding habits.

I agree with Kara that you could change this habit.
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Offline *Jo*

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #10 on: December 10, 2011, 22:20:26 pm »
hmmm ok, will try that, it does make it a little difficult though with his sleep being so messed up, making him wait longer for a feed means also making him wait longer for sleep sometimes and therefore the OT cycle continues, however its already a mess so what else could happen!
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Offline *Kara*

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #11 on: December 11, 2011, 05:08:00 am »
What about giving him a feed when he starts to get sleepy?  If he is more relaxed he might feed better (like NW and the DF) and be more receptive to an adjustment in technique...

You can always do a bum change to create a break and prevent feeding to sleep.
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Offline *Becky*

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #12 on: December 11, 2011, 09:18:53 am »
probably nothing to do with it but M does this if the milk is not warm enough and I mean really quite warm. Have you tried that Jo?
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Offline *Jo*

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #13 on: December 11, 2011, 09:26:46 am »
yep, hes got to have it quite warm, once it goes luke warm hes not interested.

just did the DF in the normal position, he drank it so fast that he just gulped too much air, im sure he will be up all night with wind, i tried to burp him but he wouldnt burp.... shouldve done the lying down one i think *sigh*
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Offline *Kara*

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Re: Levi is the most difficult feeder, so frustrated
« Reply #14 on: December 11, 2011, 20:56:37 pm »
Oh dear...
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