12MO only naps for 45 mins - please help, reaching for panic button!

[Oceanmagic]

Hi
I'm really at my wit's end, and I'm hoping you lovely people can help me out a bit.

DS is 12 months, and for the last 6 weeks or so has been having really short naps, around 35 to 45 minutes.

This is his routine.
7.00 - 7.30 Wake up
7.45 Bottle
8.20 Breakfast
9.30 ish Nap. He is often ready for this sleep. He goes down really well, but wakes grumpy after 45 minutes.

12.30 lunch

Another nap around 3.30 ish. I often have to walk him in the pushchair to get him to go off for this one.

4.45 tea
6.45 bottle
Asleep by 7.30pm.

He sleeps fabulously at night (touch wood!!) but these daytime sleeps are just getting shorter.

A few weeks ago I tried one nap, thinking that he was UT for his first nap. That one nap was also largely 45 mins too! He didn't protest about going down, but again was grumpy on waking.
Thinking I'd rather he had 2 short naps than 1 I went back to 2 sleeps after about 5 days, particularly after one afternoon when he woke very distressed after 15 minutes. That really panicked me, so I walked him, and he stayed asleep in his pushchair, even after I stopped walking, for about an hour.

Now what? What am I doing wrong? How do I get him to sleep for longer? Does he need to sleep longer? He often is rubbing his eyes etc during the day. He's not uncontrollably grizzly at any time once he's up, but I do feel he needs more sleep somewhere.

I'd be so grateful for some support with this, feel like I'm spinning around and coming back to the same problems every time!

Oceanmagic.xx

[Mackjack]

Sounds like the 2-1 transition to me. Have you tried doing 1 nap and then going for a really early bed time?

[Oceanmagic]

Thanks for your reply.

I haven't tried that one. How early do I dare go and not have him waking really early in the morning?
Will this possibly help him extend his one nap?

Sorry - more questions!

[Khalam's Mama]

I am also thinkning 2-1.

Can you push the am nap later and see if he sleeps longer. 45mins sounds UT. DS1 used to be ready for his morning naps when ever I put him down out of habit at this age but when I pushed it later he slept 3hrs!!! I would do BT 6pm if he has 1 nap.

[Mackjack]

Yes, push the first nap to later. 2.5hrs is a really short A time. Like Khalams Mama says, 45 mins coupled with the short A time sounds like UT. My LO has been on 1 nap since 11 months. We used to put her to bed at 6pm at first when she was getting used to it. Don't be scared of EWs, early bed doesn't necessarily mean he wil wake super early.
At first you might find his 1 nap is still a bit short but keep putting him to bed early and he will catch up at night and you should find the one nap gets longer.
The transition period does involve  some experimentation and you will get some grumpiness but you will get there!

[Oceanmagic]

Well, I went back to 1 nap today - 1 hr 50 mins! Started at 12.50 as he was in his cot calmly but hiccuping.
I'm trying to remind myself that it won't be like that all the time, but we're both so much better for today.

Fingers crossed for tomorrow...

Thank you.x

[Khalam's Mama]

That is great. I would have him in bed early (like 6pm) to avoid him getting OT.

Good luck tomorrow.

[Mackjack]

Thats great! Let us know what happens.

[Oceanmagic]

Well, today DS slept for a 40 minute lunchtime sleep!
He's gone off in the car at 3.30 on the way back from a friend's, so I'm sitting in the car letting him have a short nap.

Apart from an early BT tonight, any other suggestions?
I really find this uncertainty unsettling.

[Mackjack]

I know it's horrible when you don't know what there going to do sleepwise. Did you put him to bed early tonight?
How long was his A time this morning? Don't forget youre making quite a big leap from his previous 2.5hr A time so it is going to take him a while to adjust. You might want to try gradually increasing his morning A time rather than just leaping to 5hrs. I'd say a minimum of 4 hrs though. did you put him to bed early the other night when he had his 1hr 50 nap and did you get an EW or was it ok? Sorry for all the questions!
When my LO started the transition, she could handle about 4/4.5hrs Atime to start with and she would often be tired in the afternoon so we would have to battle to stop her baking again and just get her to bed really early, I.e 6pm. Took her a while to adjust but from about now at 17months she has a 3hr nap and 11/11.5hr night and had done for months.

[Mackjack]

erm, I meant "napping again" not "baking again"!!

[Oceanmagic]

Thanks for getting in touch again. It's so great to have someone to share this with.

I was brave and waited a little later to wake him this morning, definitely not EW today.  Would normally go in at 7.30 regardless, but sat on my hands till 7.45 and still had to wake him. Maybe I should have left him longer, but have always believed its best to start and end days at roughly the same time. Maybe this is true when they're younger, but not so much now? 

He was A today until 12.40. He was a bit eye rubbing at his usual 9.30, but he didn't go off in a short car journey this morning, and happily played at a friend's house and ate lunch. I walked him to get him to sleep as we were out, but he still woke after 40 mins.

He did go to bed a bit earlier last night after the big nap, but not masses earlier. Tonight I was brave and put him down 15 mins before usual, and he went straight off. He was eye rubbing around 6 as usual, but he has bath at that time, then bottle and bed by 7.30, or 7.15 tonight.
Maybe I need to be even braver and put him down even earlier in the evening rather than letting him have that later sleep? He needed it, bless him, he was laying on the floor at my friends, like he does at bedtime!

Sounds like your LO is in a lovely routine. I hope we can get to something similar soon!

xx

[Khalam's Mama]

I dont wake them at this age esp in a transition phase. I feel like they take what they need. I would move bath and bed earlier. I have always found in the transitions from 2 to 1 and 1 to 0 they end up with more sleep over all but take less in the day. I think the jump in a time is hard work so they have to compensate. We go back to 11hr days when transitioning with good effect. If he is only taking 40mins while out i would do ebt for sure and also try to limit being out to 1 day in a row to avoid ot.

[DianaG]

I think if he's rubbing his eyes it is a sign that he's ready for an earlier bedtime. Go ahead and trust your ability to listen and read his messages to you. Don't second guess or over think yourself. You know him and what he needs! I understand how the uncertainty can be mind boggling. You're doing great. Just when you think it won't ever get better, it will magically sort itself out. 

[Mackjack]

Yes, I agree,be brave and go for earlier bed. I know it feels weird putting them to bed so early but you might be pleasantly surprised!

Also, with regards to the 40 min nap, my LO never naps as well in her pram as in her cot. Dont know if thats the same for you?

While your LO is trying to adjust to the transition you might want to try making sure his naps are in his cot as much as poss. Im not saying you have to put your life on hold and stay in all the time, its just that when theyre going through these phases, consistency is key so maybe just be strict about naps being in the cot for a week or two or until you feel things are getting on track.