Can't see the wood for the trees - 2:1 help please

[katiepierce]

Hi ladies,

I was wondering if any of you troopers who have come out of the other side of the 2:1 would mind sharing you're opinion on how thinks are going with us.....

Henry has just turned 13 months and has been poorly on and off for about a month but *hopefully* (fingers crossed very tightly) he's now on the mend. He's had a rough few weeks poor lamb.

I dont really know where we are at the moment, feeling a bit low to be honest because I just cannot read him at the moment.

We were having NW when he was properly poorly and now we're having EMW at about 5, I try everything I can to get him to go back off and must admit 90% of the time have resorted to a quick dilluted feed and he has been going back off to sleep until 7.30/8. I think this was a combination of hunger and OTness. He wasnt eating much when ill and getting very OT because of the NWs. Now I don't know if  OT or habit...

With regard to naps they are bit all over the place in terms of times and lengths. I have NO CLUE if I've putting him down OT or UT but he has started to fight it like mad. Monday it took him 1 hour to settle! Yesterday 20 mins and today was slightly better at 10 minutes. For the last few weeks of only having 1 nap he's been asleep practically as soon as his head hits the cot. I am doing the same thing as have been doing from the start - nap 4.5 hours from wake up. Getting naps of anything between 1.5 - 3.15 hours! I'd say usually 2-2.5 hours, so quite good.

Do you think he is OT from the transition and because of the EMW breaking up his nights? Or UT because now he is getting used to 1 nap he could cope with it being pushed back? He can be terribly cranky in the afternoon even after a mamouth nap - does this indicate OT?

Should I change what I'm going? Move to 5 hours awake time? Set nap? Not feed at EMW? Would I be better doing longer mornings and shorter afternoons to try to combat OT at bedtime?

I just don't know what I should be doing - I know the 2:1 is a rocky old road and I can cope with that but I just need a plan : ( HELP!

Sorry for ranting!

X

[*Becky*]

Hi,
Could you post your routine in EAS format so I can see exactly what his day looks like.

Is he teething at the moment?

bx

[katiepierce]

Yes sorry should have thought to include!

Wake 5ish or earlier - try to get back to sleep in numerous ways mostly end up giving diluted feed. Back to sleep by 6 latest.

7.30/8 - wake, half bottle (due to feed at 5)

8.30/9 - breakie. Hard to say how much he takes, was good before illness but now it can vary. Usually get something into him, toast if all else fails.

11.30ish - lunch. Again a bit up and down recently but usually a good size portion of carb/protein and pudding.

LTN - 4.5 hrs from wakeup so between 12/12.30. Cup of milk before hand. Self settles nut has been taking a while some days. Sleeps from 1.5 - 3 hours. Usually between 2 and 2.5

2/2.30ish - wake and snack.

5/5.30 - tea time. Finger food, usually a good amount.

6.30 - full bottle

6.45 - asleep. Self settles quickly.

Today was typical - wake 7.50 (awake 5-6), nap 12.15 - 2.15, bed 6.45. On paper things our days arnt too bad. It's just the early mornings!

Feel like I've lost the ability to read him...dont know if UT or OT or developmental or what. Not sure what to change.....

X

[*Becky*]

I would imagine he is coming into a light sleep and is not able to re settle easily and has got used to the feed. Sorry, not what you want to hear but I would cut that feed out. I would decide what time you will accept to start the day i.e. 6am and then try to resettle if he wakes before then. Chances are you will not be able to as he has got used to the feed but he will soon get used to not having it.

This will probably mean you start your days a bit earlier for a while and as he is only 13 months I would probably go back to 2 naps while you re adjust to the new morning routine.

What do you think?

[katiepierce]

Hi Becky, thanks for your relpy.

I came to the same conclusion last night and decided to feed no more at 5. He needed it when he was ill but he definitely doesnt anymore so you're right it has to go! Annoyed with myself for bring it back in the first place really but was worried about him being dehydrated and to be honest I'm such a bad sleeper myself at the moment that the fastest option was the most appealing : /

So last night he slept well but woke at 5 like usual. My DH and I hadnt properly discussed what approach we were going to take so just kind of looked at each other not knowing what to do. DH went it and tried to pat him back to sleep for about 30 mins but he was getting hysterical so I went in and lifted him for a cuddle, he was soon asleep in my arms and I lowered him back to cot where he slept a further stretch to 6.30.

So my question is as I dont want to just replace one prop with another - how should I be trying to settle him at this age? He doesnt stand but does get up on hands and knees and flop around. He is an independant sleeper at all other times when we literally drop and run! He is highly spirited and gets wound up when someone is there but obviously dont want to leave him to CIO in any way (DH would happily do this but am prepared to sleep train a gentler way by myself if I cant get him on board)

Could wake to sleep work? We had great success with this at 4 months for short naps but I guess this is quite different.

Thanks. X

[*Becky*]

that sounds pretty good tbh, the fact he went back to sleep It also shows from a routine point of view that he is still tired - there is nothing worse than trying to get an UT baby back to sleep at 5am!

I would give it a couple more days doing what you are doing but trying to keep him in the cot. Might he settle better for you or does it not make a difference? It could be that after 5-7 days he will realise there is no milk and just re settle himself at that time.

If not you could def try W2S.

Keep us posted xx