need help and advice please

[dizzy]

don't know where to put this but need someone.
i am very tearful and stressed. My lo of 8 months will not go down for a nap without screaming and I don't know why he has strated doing it. He is also waking in the night for a feed at random times and drinking about 5 oz. He has had silent reflux but a milk thickner seems to have made this much better. He has a cough and today a runny nose. He has been screaming for naps on and off for a while but now it is constant. I have tried earlier naps and later naps but nothing seems to change it. He used to be able to put himself to sleep in his cot althought it takes a while. He will only go for a nap with a bottle and I have decided to live with this as befoe he wouldn't drink more than an oz or 2 on a feed but now he drinks full bottles. He has no dummy as I went cold turkey at 6 months but he does like to suck and sucks his fingers or his lovey and yessterday my hand. I have tried patting in the cot but he mioves my hand away. In the past I have held him and walked round the room but unless he is so tired that he passes out it doesn't work. Sometimes he can go 2 hrs 30 mins sometimes he can go 3 hrs or more it seems very random. I cannot bear the screaming. He has just done it to me and in the end I put the light on. He then starts chatting to himself and in the end went to sleep so I went in and turned the light off and he is still asleep. No idea?
At the moment we plan to go to stay with relatives for 4 weeks in 5 weeks time but I am beginning to panic about it already as I cannot cope with the screaming. When he did go down for a nap without it I would be layed on the floor in his room not even dearing to breath until he had gone off and any noises would wake him again. I cannot do this in someone elses home for a month? We live in another country which is why we are going for so long and DS1 is so excitied and I don't know if I can tell him we are not going any more but we will only have 2 rooms when we go and lo seems to need to sleep alone and DH not impressed with plan for us to sleep with DS1 as will need a lot of furniture moving. My dad's wife is deaf and very noisy and they live in an old house with noisy door handles and floor boards that I am sure will wake lo. I think I may have pnd as I am so stressed and miserable?

[babybarr]

Sending ((((hugs)))) as this is the couch but have you posted a sleep thread? I'm sure there will be many lovely ladies willing to lend a hand.

[cuckoochick]

Hugs sweetie, it certainly sounds like you have a lot going on and a lot of what you said resonates with how I felt when I had PND and anxiety which was very much bound up in my DD's sleep. I've BTDT lying on the floor hardly daring to breathe, creeping around the house, not wanting to go anywhere or do anything for fear of DD not sleeping.

If you'd like hugs and advice relative to PPD this post can be moved. You can check out some links on that board, particularly the Edinburgh test (I'm on phone so I can't post link right now as off out) might be useful. Or the thread can stay here for hugs.

Either way I'm here to hold your hand, lovely

[Colin Macs Mom]

Sweetie I am going to move your thread to Naps so that you can get some advice in that regard, since the Couch is a place for hugs and not advice. 

[dizzy]

ok but wasn't sure where to put it. I want advice on coping when we go home as well or on the verge of cancelling.
Have seen the Dr as the HV sent me as lo has a cough etc. he said that didn't want to give lo anything but that if not ok at the end of the week to come back for an inhaylor.
He gave me antidepressents like they were sweets and my pill to see if that will balance the hormones. I haven't been taking anything as they gave me the mini pill after lo was born when I was breast feeding. I took 3 months but it didn't agree with me and I just haven't got back there to get it sorted. Not sure if I should take the tablets and how long do they take before they work?

[creations]

Hi Dizzy
Would you like to post a recent EAS so I can take a look please?

If LO has a cough and cold then he is going to find sleeping more difficult, the same as you or I would when we are poorly.  You might need to ride that out until he is feeling better after his cold but there's no harm in looking at your EAS to see if anything can help.  Do you think the reflux needs further medicating?

The thing with the light, I have done this once or twice with DS when I was utterly desperate, I wouldn't recommend it as a regular thing to do, I know I certainly wouldn't like someone putting the light on suddenly, I think in the circumstances it is the shock of the change that brings them out of that almost hypnotic crying, like they get carried away with it.  Other things I have done when I felt I really couldn't get DS out of that focus of crying was to take him out of the room, again it surprised him out of his crying.  Again I don't suggest this as a regular thing, I've done it when DS seemed utterly unable to stop crying even though I was holding and cuddling him.

hugs to you
x