not sure Put Down is working for my 13 month old

[eagroff2]

HI!
Today was day 6 of using "put down" with my daughter for naps and bedtime. The first day started out taking 3 1/2 hours for her to go to sleep (finally went to sleep at 11pm). The next few nights hovered around 2- 2 1/2 hours of PD time. Second night fell asleep at 10:30pm. Normal bedtime is 7-7:30. Naps took 1 1/2-2 hours for PD time too causing a new problem......only time for 1 nap (not 2) and it is a shorter nap now.....about 1 -1 1/2 hours. (Before she was sleeping that long, but 2 times a day. Since PD has been taking so long, she can only get in one nap without making bedtime later) The 5th night was 40 minutes, but then she had 3 short WUs and one 2 hour wake time (12:30-2:30am). Nap today was barely one hour and tonight was back to 3 hours of put down to finally settle and go to sleep at 8:20pm. With only one nap, she ends up being up 6 or 7 hours before bedtime. As the days go on, she seems to be getting more and more overtired causing less and less sleep and more WUs. I thought each day was supposed to get easier

She does not cry while we do PD, in fact she barely fusses until she gets too tired. She just roams around the crib. FRom doing PD each day, she has learned what happens when she stands up......she gets PD, so now she crawls around the crib or "walks" on her knees or gets into the down doggie yoga position......all to avoid standing up to be PD. She hasn't learned to settle faster....yet.

I think our sleep problem lies between the "Calming down to get sleepy" phase and actually falling asleep. As part of our bedtime routine, I give her milk and rock her, but she is still awake. She is so relaxed all she would have to do is close her eyes, but when I put her in the crib, she gets a whole new burst of energy, winds herself up, and keeps going until she gets so overtired and we are doing PD for hours.

Does anyone have experience doing PD....is this how it works? I am frustrated and tired and I am not sure I am helping her. IT feels like I am creating a new bedtime routine that involves hours of PD. I was using props before to get her to sleep which is why I am trying PD now so she will fall sleep in her crib. How long should I give it before I try something else?

Any ideas would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

[Jem88]

Hi, we've been doing this for 2 weeks now as i was cuddling/holding my LO until she was sleeping then putting her into her cot. But now we're expecting baby no.2 i thought it was best to have her settling in her cot. My LO does the exact same as yours but she only takes 30min max to settle. She was getting OT at bedtime so i've now started putting her down 35mins earlier than her nap/bedtime so she can "play" then settle to sleep. I have had to kind of lay her down and gently hold my hand on her back/side when i know she's getting a little OT and is still running around her cot lol.

We do sometimes have NWs and her playing and taking 1hr-1hr30mins to settle again, we actually had one at 4.30 this morning where she just wanted to play and finally settled again after 1hr10mins.

My post might not help alot/at all. Hopfully someone who can give better advice will come along soon. x

[Shiv52]

When you are PD, is she crying ?  YOu only PD if she cries.  So you put her in her crib, say your sleepy phrase and leave her to it.  you can pat the mattress every so often and say your phrase and then leave her to it.  IF she gets upset then again pat the mattress and see will she then lie down and if not lie her down.  But at this age you are aiming for them to lie themselves down if and when possible.   

I agree with PP that once i did lie my DD1 down I kept a hand on her for a minute or two to help her settle. 

How much A time does she have before the first nap?

[eagroff2]

Thank you Jem88 for your post! It was helpful because it is nice to know that someone else is going through the same thing, that "running around the crib" is not unusual, and that since we've only been doing this for one week, I should give it more time. I did try the hand on her too, but it didnt work as well for me....she just reacted and got more squirmy, but we tried! Thanks for replying!!!



Thank you Shiv52 for your post too. My LO was not crying when I PD. Whenever she stood up, I put her down. So...we have been working on patting the crib and lying down. Tonight she laid herself down and went to sleep on her own with very little fussing. YEAHHHHH!!! It still took 1 hour 10 min of "running around the crib", but that is an improvement!! Thank you!

Her A time before her first nap is about 45-60 minutes. She usually goes down for her first nap 2 hours after she wakes up in the morning. When she wakes from the first nap, she goes down for her second nap about 3 -3 1/2 hours later.

[stardust599]

Can you post your EASY so we can have a look at A times etc.?

You need to be timing bedtime perfectly (or as close as you can get :-D) and after your bedtime routine, putting LO down and tucking her in.  Then say your sleep time phrase, leave the room and leave her to it.  If/when she cries you go back in shush her, (comforting her with cuddle, touch, soothing words etc. if she is upset) lie her down and tuck her back in and repeat your sleep time phrase.  If she doesn't cry just leave her for 15-20mins then go back in tuck her in etc. and repeat the sleep time phase.

It sounds like she is getting too much day time sleep and not enough A time hence why she just wants to run around the crib playing!  In comparison, my LO had 1.5 hours after 4hours after waking at that age and then a 30minute catnap in the late afternoon.  This was the maximum in a day -

6.30am Wake
10.30am-12.00pm Nap 1
4.00-4.30pm Nap
7.00pm Bedtime

I think if you haven't been doing EASY and recording A times etc. then the best thing to start with is to start a diary - recording the times she wakes, eats, naps, wakes, bedtime etc. and how many times in the night she wakes, how long, what's her behaviour like?  Then we can all have a look and see where we can get you started!

Good luck xx

[Shiv52]

At 13 months her A time should be at least 3 hours, normally 4.  If  you are putting her down after only 2 hours she will really not be tired enough to go to sleep. 

Agree with pp, can you post your EAS and we can take a look.