We have reached that 'age' where BF can be an awkward topic :(

[ZacsMumme]

I'm not sure if this is the right place feel free to move!

So Z is almost 18 months. I never thought I would still be Bf him! It is only 1 feed before bed and he is showing o signs of wanting to wean. He is touchy spirited, but very very sensitive to change so I'm not keen on just stopping IYKWIM

Suddenly I'm getting comments after asked if I'm still BF ie
'oh as long as you aren't doing it when he's 5'
'really? Why?'
Or a patronizing 'good on you' followed by 'I couldn't imagine still BF my LO' like its now weird

Why does it go from 'you must BF' to 'OMG gross' in like 6 months
If you are or have Bf past 15-16 mths What do you say when asked about it. ESP to older people (less in touch with the benefits etc) or bottle feeding mums (I'm not saying all!!) who think its gross

[cuckoochick]

I get this a lot!! This post may seem a bit ironic given my other post at the minute!

Lots of people keep hinting that I should be weaning that BT feed but for LOs of a comparative age to C who have a bottle before bed, nobody suggests that BT bottle should be weaned or given in a cup.

WRT what I say: both C and I are still enjoying it. For me as a working mum, it is lovely that I get to have that bedtime snuggle and feed her after being apart from her for 4 days per week. C is very routiney so she expects the boob first thing on a morning and at BT so I know for us she might not ever fully self-wean so it may be that I need to gently push for that and that will involve small tweaks to her routine (like this morning!)

[skatty]

It is noone elses business, crikey 18 months is still a baby FFS, sorry but that is so annoying 

[Claudiamummy]

I am getting this now at 12m!!!!

I actually tell them I plan on doing it till she starts work....
And will probably meet her in town on her nights out for a quick top up!!

 Laugh laugh subject closed!!

Hang in there Sara, and hugs xx

[becj86]

Yeah, starting to get this at 11.5months too DS does still have 4 feeds a day though, so I leave work and go up to feed him at day care on the two days I work... I just work through lunch instead but still reckon I'd spend more time away from my desk if I was a smoker.

Fact is, he STTN 12hrs+ if he has his feeds, if I drop one, he wakes for a feed in the MOTN so I figure he needs it.

Not sure how to respond but listening in

[amayzie]

The WHO reccommends BF till 2 years!! And honestly- if it's a bed time feed- in the privacy of your own home- then who cares!!! I can't believe people are getting grief at 11 and 12 months!! Becj- you and your EXTREME breastfeeding!!!

I think in the past that BFing was weaned a lot earlier- mum weaned us at 9 monts and that was pretty much the norm.. onto COWS MILK! Crazy!

I'm planning on doing exactly the same as you Sara- keeping the BT feed till 2 years.. I'll practice my 'face' and responses now!

 

[cath~]

I just stopped bfing L 2 weeks ago, shortly after she turned 18 months. From 11-18 months I was just bfing once/day when she woke. However, if it did come up in conversation (which it didn't much - I think most ppl would never have imagined I wld have still been bfing then) I did feel slightly embarrassed admitting that I was.. and was wary of how they might react.

There are so many things in parenting where you will get annoying comments from others (sleep training, discipline, eating habits...) I think this is just another one of those areas where ppl have strong views and/or the potential to say something annoying/offensive (perhaps without meaning to), esp perhaps some mums who FF their babies who may be a little defensive/guilty about not having bf (I am thinking of one of my friends in particular here..)

I wonder what a 'good' response/comment would be anyway, without sounding patronising!

Basically, I guess what I'm trying (not very concisely!) to say is stick to doing what you want to do and think is best for Z and try not to let other ppls comments get to you. I think it is inevitable with being a parent that ppl will saying things that annoy/offend us sometimes.

Claire - I love your response. LOL Sarcasm is usually the best way to close these kinds of 'conversations' isn't it!

[Shiv52]

{{{hugs}}}

I just tended not to talk about it.  I'm still feeding R and she is nearly 18 months and I mentioned it to a mummy at school the other day as we were discussing MPI and she actually said 'good for you, you do what suits you all best' and that is the first positive response I had gotten!  

If people push I tend to say the WHO recommend BFing until 2YO so am keeping in line with that!!

It is only 1 feed before bed and he is showing o signs of wanting to wean. He is touchy spirited, but very very sensitive to change so I'm not keen on just stopping IYKWIM

Maeve never would have self weaned either.   i weaned our final feeds at 19 months as I was pregnant with Rosa and my boobs and nipples were so sensitive and I also wanted to have my boobs to myself for a bit before starting all over again.  I also didn't want to tandem nurse and wanted her weaned a good while before the baby came so she didn't associate no BFing with the baby.  She actually weaned fairly easily and settled for snuggling with her hand down my top (which we then weaned a while after!!)  

[mum101]

Hmm, I felt this too. In fact I stopped talking about it once DS got to 1 year old.  People stop asking too, interestingly.

However, thinking the older generation would be a bit stiff upper lip about it, I was expecting DH's grandma to be surprised, and she said 'well done, it's the best thing ever'. 

I tend to remind people it's recommended until a child is 2, AND natural weaning can be as long as 4 years old.  And then I stick my tongue out at them!

[lauraweb]

I fed till around 15 months when we were both ready to stop. DS was probably ready a good few months before me! I know exactly what you mean about people's comments. It really does feel as if bottle feeding is still seen as more normal than breast feeding once you get past the newborn phase. So sad. I was the only one in my coffee group who fed past 6 months. People seemed quite incredulous about it as if it was a major feat when to me it was utterly normal and easy. Like Shiv I never really talked about it too much to people as it was just our night feed so kind of personal.

When people did comment I just used to say how much I loved our final snuggle for the day together. Funny though, just met up with my coffee group tonight and they were all asking how long I was planning on BF this time. DD is only 7 months old and it's not something I have even thought about really, I just will until we are ready to stop. Such a funny mindset to have.

[Katet]

Lots of people keep hinting that I should be weaning that BT feed but for LOs of a comparative age to C who have a bottle before bed, nobody suggests that BT bottle should be weaned or given in a cup.

I too found irony in that fact, with some people I knew still giving a bottle at 3yo, it is about perspective.

For me I just didn't talk about it.  There is a boy who does sport with DS2 whose younger brother is about 3 (youngest of 5 children) & the Mum quite happily popped out her breast & gave him a feed at the sports field the other week- while carrying on a conversation with me & I'd only ever met her DH before that... IMHO the people who comment are rude & I kind of said as much to someone I knew.

[amayzie]

People seemed quite incredulous about it as if it was a major feat

I tell you what- the major feat at this point would be stopping! I think DS would go crazy if i shut the milk bar! Boob man in the making ;P

So rude!!

[anna*]

Stan was BFed til he was 2 but to be honest I don't recall that it ever came up as a topic of conversation. As you say, his BFs were first thing in the morning and last thing at night, so who would even know? If anyone did question it they would be met with a quick response that WHO recommends BF until 2, isn't it a shame that more people don't know that and aren't I lucky that he will still let me BF him!

[~ Vik ~]

Dylan was over 2.5 before we finally dropped the bedtime feed 'permanently' (between 2-2.5 it was off and on, I was doing don't offer, don't refuse weaning). Because it was the bedtime feed I really just didn't talk about it tbh (though it's a shame that that's the way it is), and those that are close to me were supportive.
(((hugs)))

[Roseii]

I wasn't as "extreme" but whenever it was mentioned (and to be fair I never had a negative comment) I'd say "yes I guess I'll go and poke my boob thru the fence at school when she's on her lunch break"