Sleep and EASY Support for spirited babies

[becj86]

You may need an EASY tweak - this is a typical age to be dropping the catnap and she may just not quite be tired enough... The head banging on the side of the crib is scary, sounds awful DS did it too - always when teething and it was to distract himself from the pain, so maybe some teething meds would help?

She may also be going through a wonder week - http://www.thewonderweeks.com/index.php/about-the-wonder-weeks/your-babys-10-leaps/mental-leap-5

There are a lot of things going on for her at the moment, so give the routine a tweak, give her a little extra TLC while she teeths and her brain makes a whole lot of new connections and remember, this too shall pass

[timmysmommy]

Welcome 2012 Momma!

I just need to vent a minute!  I am just exhausted with my two lo's!  My older ds is quite easy now that he is older ( comes out as y on rysc) with the exception of his aggression toward other kids older and younger, and in particular his sister.  DD is much more spirited.  She seems VERY easily frustrated and fusses on and off all day.  She is still waking at night although I had a few sttn when I started supplementing with formula.  Recently when she wakes her leg has been stuck between the slats in the crib.  Two of her three wakeups last night were stuck legs.  I think the hardest part is they are both high energy, and low sleep needs.  I'm cutting naps for both right now trying to get some shorter days.  For the last 10 months I've had kids awake from 6:30-10:30 plus multiple nw's and I'm just completely drained!! 

I don't really need any advice I guess.  I've been on the discipline board for my son, naps boards for both kids, and nw's board and bfing board for dd.  Our travel for the summer is over I think so I'm hoping we can settle into a new schedule that will help.  Ds only naps every three days, and I'm experimenting with one nap for dd in a desperate attempt to have everyone asleep by 8:30 or 9 each night.

Thanks for listening!  Maybe I should have posted on the couch!!

[Jessleigh]

Ok, not sure where to post this question so I'll start here.

Dealing with a 3 hour time change. HI is 3 hours ahead. I went on the FAQ board regarding travel but the advice didn't help.

We had a LONG day yesterday. Up at 4am. She did great on the 2 flights luckily. When we got here I wasn't sure what to do w bedtime so I just gave her an extra Carnap and put her down at 7pm HI time hoping shed be tired enough to go back to sleep if she woke at 3am.
Nope. One NW at 1am. Then again at 3am and would NOT go back down.

That means her first nap will be around 6am. Do I let her nap as long as she wants or wake her at 7 to get back on track? Should I keep putting her down for BT at 7pm?

Do any other mothers of a spirited have advice for a 3 hr time change? Thanks!

[becj86]

Hugs, Amy xx I hope you can get them onto a nice routine that allows you a bit more opportunity to rest.

Jessleigh - How long are you there? I can't remember I'd be really tempted to keep her on the same time zone as home if its a week or so If its a longer visit but not permanent, I'd just wing it. I don't think there's any nice easy way to get a 3hr change into a baby Maybe a super EBT and crossed fingers - she'll be OT from that long day and the short night so she may just do a really long night.

[timmysmommy]

Thanks Bec.  Had a peaceful evening with both kids asleep by 8, but Emily was up most of the night.  This isn't new obviously.  I think it's SA.  She won't go to sleep without me in the room.  Then wakes up at night to see me.  Should make me feel special right lol!

[becj86]

Should make you feel special I know it doesn't feel that way in the middle of the night though, believe me. We have had wicked SA since we moved

[2012mama]

Thanks for the note Becj86.  Another horrible night last night.  I think she was up at least 10 times last night.  We tried putting her down a little later this morning and she went to sleep around 930, only slept for 30 mins, then shushed her back to sleep for 10 mins and she slept another 40 mins.  We are going to attempt the next nap a little later too, around 2 pm or so and nix the catnap.  We are giving her baby Advil and some Anbesol for her teething.  Here's to hoping!

I was wondering if anyone has tried the Safe T Sleep for their spirited one?  I am wondering if it works because I think most of my LO's problem is waking herself up from all the movement.

[becj86]

We didn't use anything other than a blanket to swaddle... so I'm not much help there. FWIW, DS moves around a lot when sleeping, I often wonder if its actually restful It did wake him when he was younger but once he found a couple of comfortable positions (to him, no way no how could I sleep like that) he would sleep better without restraints.

[Tecike]

2012mama, so sorry, no help here. We're also using a blanket only as my DS is the same as bec's - moving around all the time and sleeping in really awkward positions. Thankfully he's not waking anymore with all the moving around.

Amy, oh yeah, the SA that makes you feel special! Well we're having it as well and it doesn't make me feel special...  Probably there's something wrong with me! 

Well, I've finally read the book! It was a real eye opener for me... I have to work on myself more than I thought, but hopefully it won't be so hard! Fact is, I'm an introvert and I just have to work on my 'talking side' as apparently talking through is much more important than I figured.

I also need to do my first plan to success and I'd like to ask for some help there. I'm going back to work FT in 2 weeks and Vic will be watched by my ILs. We have trouble with SA and sleep, as in over a year I was the only one putting him to sleep naps and bedtime. We have been working on SA over the summer, I was leaving him with ILs for a short time first and gradually increased it. He is fine with them now, though they say he often looks for me but they can distract him easily lately and had no major screaming. He napped there twice so far, the first time he did an hour and the second time 5 mins!  They were trying to do the WD we do at home, no success obviously. So I took the book to make a plan...

1. Predict the reactions - he's slow to adapt, so the crib and environment is fairly new to him, also the change in the perosn putting him to sleep might disturb him. He's energetic, so will toss and turn quite a lot while falling alseep  - I told this to ILs, so they're prepared. Should I tell them to be consistent and develop their own WD to help him nap there?
2.Organize the setting - as he's now familiar with their house, the bedroom and the crib, I made them a white noise CD and told them to darken the room. Not sure, if this is enough...
3. Work together - got lost here a bit, as he's so young to talk with. I am telling him how he will spend his mornings with granny and how they'll play together. I told him he 'd take a nice nap and by the time I pick him up he'll be well rested to play with me. Not sure what he understands of all this... 
4. Enjoy the rewards - That's the part I look forward to! When he did a nice nap, I told him I could see how good he slept.
Does this sound OK?

[becj86]

Yay Tecike! So glad you've read the book and able to apply it so well

I think its probably worth getting your IL's to make their own WD routine that is similar but not the same as yours. Keep in mind it will take time for him to get used to it. It took DS 5 months to nap at daycare as he would at home (time and restfulness wise). He always went to sleep fine but was so OS he would always short nap. They actually called me when he slept >45mins because it was such a milestone

I found the book helpful in terms of realising I needed that alone time to recharge my energy so I could give it out again to DS - I'm an introvert as is DH, DS is an extrovert We both are pretty depleted by the end of the day.

I found that talking to DS even though I wasn't sure how much he understood was really helpful. It helped me think it through so I could explain it and talking to him like I knew what I was doing - so with confidence and conviction - helped him to feel more calm I think too. I thought of it as practise for when he does understand but its amazing how much they do get at this age.

[SukieCat]

Hi All!

I'm new to BW and EASY and would like to join this thread.  I confess I haven't read all of it but it seemed like a good place to go to for "spirited babies"-specific questions/issues/support/etc.

My DS is 4 months old and quite spirited.  I have a really hard time reading his cues, especially sleepy cues, because it seems like he's always wound up and flailing.  We're dealing with a bunch of issues that I've posted to other boards but I have a question for you all - What kind of wind down routine works for your babies at nap time?  Or, do you remember what worked at 4 months?  Right now the only way I can get DS to sleep is by nursing him (prop) and he only sleeps for very short times (I think he is OT and OS).  He also seems to have somewhat negative associations with his sleep sack, because he starts to cry the minute I lay him down to zip him into it.  He works himself into a frenzy quite easily.  He's never fallen asleep on his own, and I don't even think I've ever seen him settle on his own.  What works for your spirited kiddos?

[becj86]

Minimal winddown was best with DS. At 4 months, he often slept swaddled on the floor so he didn't feel like he was missing out on anything, then I'd sing to him and he'd go to sleep.

45min naps are developmental at this age - quite normal when LO's sleep is becoming more cyclical.

Doing a modified shush/pat worked nicely for sleep training, but I did it once DS was well rested and into a good routine that suited him. How's your EASY?

Keeping activity low-key and going outside a lot both helped with sleep.

[roimata9]

SukieCat, my boy was the same as yours at that age. It got to the stage where he would start screaming if we just went into his room, let alone try to get him to sleep.
What worked for us was lengthening his A time - I also had trouble reading his cues and had left him at the same A time for too long.
I would do a really low key activity for about 20 mins, then our routine was: nappy change, put into sleep sack, story, walk to the bedroom singing his sleep song, put in bed, stroke forehead and say sleep phrase.
He slept in a hammock, so I'd bounce him to sleep before that. I decided to go cold turkey on the bouncing, extend his A time and do the routine. It worked really well.
Good luck!

[Solene]

Hello all, I suddenly had a lightbulb moment.
I saw this on my unread posts list, and realized that, of course, my youngest is a spirited child indeed.
I've even recommended others to read up on spirited kids before, but all that has obviously just leaked out of my brain since my youngest was born 18 months ago.
But when I read up on it now myself, it was just such a great lightbulb moment.
Everything fits on him since he was in utero.
That explains a lot! Lol.
So, hiya, I'll just hang out here with you guys.

[SukieCat]

We are still working on establishing our EASY routine.  I am aiming for A times of 1 hr 45 min to start with.  This morning's nap was a total disaster, he ended up not napping at all.  He laid in his crib yawning for awhile and I stayed with him but he never really settled.  He'd start crying and I'd try sh-pat but that doesn't really do anything for him either.  For his afternoon nap I ended up letting him comfort nurse to sleep because I figured he'd be a monster if he skipped another nap. 

He seems to know when I want to get him to nap, and he doesn't like it.  He'll start to cry as soon as we go into his room if it is dark.  I've tried to get him to sleep in other places too but nothing works except nursing.  I think we'll need to do PU/PD but I'm a bit scared to start because I think he'll just scream the whole time.  I don't typically let him fuss much in his crib because it escalates very quickly to all out screaming.  Did any of you have to do PU/PD with your kids?  Did it work?  What do I do if I'm trying Pu/PD and he becomes inconsolable?  Usually when it's nap time, me picking him up doesn't calm him down.

At least when it's not nap time he is a very happy baby.  The only time he gets worked up is when I'm trying to get him to go down, or when he is OT after not napping...