Terrible Habit - Paying the Price!!

[eshea]

Well, never thought I'd be here in this situation but I am.    My 13 mth old son is weaned except for the BT feeding.  And, much to my better judgement, I have definitely let it become the prop for helping him fall asleep.  Sometimes he is just so groggy that he can barely lift his head, sometimes he is passed out cold.

I'm pretty dried up (I think), so I know he's not doing it for any milk.  It's just for comfort and it's time to stop!  Tonight my daughter popped her head into the room when I was BFing him and he stopped to see what it the disruption was.  I put my shirt down and proceeded with our naptime routine (books, lullabies, kisses) before I put him in his crib.  Now he's VERY angry and crying.  It's been going on for 30 minutes and I'm going in, putting him back down, saying my good night, and leaving.  I know I need to stick with it but of course I feel terrible.

Anything I might be missing in terms of making this easier for the two of us?  I know to expect the worse since he's older, but I don't want to create any extra problems re: separation anxiety or something.

Thanks for the help and support!!

[*Kara*]

Is there a reason you are determined to stop it?  If you think your supply is dropping, he may give it up on his own soon regardless.

[eshea]

I'm mostly determined just to stop BFing him to sleep.  It took 45 min. last night for him to settle himself down and not have me nurse him just to get him to sleep.  Sorry if I was unclear - that's the problem. 

I also would like to be able to go out in the evening before putting him to bed.  Since I'm his prop I can't do that yet.  We have a few events coming up in the next month where a sitter will have to put him to bed.

Should I stop BFing him cold turkey, or start to cut back the minutes?  I would assume I also have to be very diligent about keeping him awake before getting him in his bed, right?

[Kay Dee]

Well done on sticking with it last night! The first night is usually the hardest.

If you didn't want to totally stop BF you could move it earlier in his bedtime routine so that he's not relying on it to fall asleep. Would that work? Or would you rather totally stop?

x

[eshea]

I think I might rather totally stop.    A bit sad about it, but the summer is a good time for us to go through some of these changes. 

Maybe should I have DH put him to bed, or is that just too traumatic?

[Kay Dee]

I think it's best to be consistent and repeat whatever you did last night. And remember he's crying because he's angry and doesn't like change, not because there's anything wrong. He'll adjust quickly if you stick with it.

I was sad to stop too but it was for the best. I didn't feel there was much milk left at that stage so no real benefit to keeping it up. I think I was more upset about it than DD!

x