Newborn

[emily9724]

Hi everyone! I am brand new here and am very interested in the Easy method for my 3 week old baby girl. I have not read the book but have researched a lot. My question is is she is 3 weeks old when should I start an easy routine? Since day one I have been diligent about keeping her awake during feedings (ebf right now) and have also tried to keep her awake after every day time feeding. It I getting easier to keep her awake after she eats since she is becoming more alert. I feel like we have a good start but wondering when to really start getting her awake time in the morning started etc? If it's not too soon to start, how do I need to make it happen? I feel very lost so any help is greatly appreciated! Thanks!

[Ima shel Alon]

It sounds like you are already doing great!
At this age I would say you are doing the most important thing and that's separating the E from the S by having A (so a routine really), and enjoying her of course!
There is a lot of info here: http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=186622.0 but IIWY I would still keep things as they are now if you are happy with it and maybe start implementing more of EASY when you see sleep becomes more bumpy.

[creations]

Hello, I just wanted to pop in and agree with Ima shel Alon, you are doing great

I began EASY with my DS when he was 4 weeks old so I've been almost where you are now.  My advice would be to keep your expectations low and your patience high and also that there is no hurry so don't pressure yourself into getting it 'right' or achieving independent sleep immediately.  My DS was basically independent at 10 weeks but by that I mean that when the timing is right, when his wind down is calm, when he is not poorly or teething (etc etc) he goes into his bed awake and I leave the room before he falls to sleep.  Even the best independent sleeper has many many times when they need a bit more help, some more shush/pat, another cuddle, or a reassuring voice.  So, take it one sleep at a time and don't worry if some sleeps you need to hold her to get her to sleep.
Enjoy your little girl

[emily9724]

Thanks so much for the encouragement ladies! I've tried to do the EASY routine today but she is falling asleep almost immediately after eating. I just now managed to keep her awake for a diaper change but she is fast asleep now. Do I wake her up soon or let her sleep until her next feeding in about 2 hours? I also don't understand the dream feed. Should I be doing that this early and if so do I decide the time and just start feeding her? Help!

[creations]

When they are this young they spend a lot of time sleeping so it's fine to let her sleep until her next feed.  Some people don't wake LO for the feed unless any problem arises for example if weight gain is a problem I would wake her for the feed, if she gets day and night mixed up (more awake time at night, and very little awake time in the day) then this would also be a reason to wake from a nap to establish day/night routines.

The link Ima shel Alon gave is a great source or information, unfortunately at the moment (due to a recent upgrade to the site which hasn't got all the glitches ironed out just yet) the links are all showing as web addresses rather than titles of the pages they link to.  This one for example is "Typical Amounts of Day and Night Sleep"
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=85130.0
You will see that at this age a baby sleeps for 1 to 2 hrs in every 3 hrs.  Not much A time at all, it's really just enough time to feed change gaze at one another then go into your wind down for sleep.
Don't panic about there not being much A time between E and S, a nappy change is enough, it just separates the E from the S so that your LO learns to sleep without being fed to sleep.

This link is very useful "is my baby ready to increase his A time?"
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=64158.0
It gives you a guide as to how long you can expect your LO to stay awake between naps.  About 1hr is usual at this age (and they can take up to 45 mins to feed so no wonder there is little time for anything other than a nappy change).

Here's a page on "cluster and dream feeding FAQs"
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=54662.0
(you need to scroll down to reply no. 5 for "when to start" as I can't manage to link directly there for you).
If your LO is feeding every 2 or 2.5 hrs or so at the moment (this is a guess) then I would initially time the DF at the same interval eg if feeds are at 6pm and 8pm then DF at 10pm.  The idea is to let LO continue sleeping.  It doesn't always work immediately, not all LOs take to it even with continued attempts and my LO always woke for his (not the idea but he would never let anything in his mouth, even so it was still better for me to feed him at that time and put him straight back to sleep so his long sleep began at my bed time).  You don't have to introduce it tonight if you are feeling overwhelmed by all the new stuff!

I hope this helps some.
Do return to Ima shel Alons link and read whatever you can when you can grab a few minutes, or brows through the FAQs which might be easier just now as they are all showing their titles rather than the web address.
xx

[emily9724]

Great thank you so much! Another question...I was going to try to dream feed tonight but lo has yet to fall asleep since her 7:30 feeding. It's like she is fighting sleep which is typical for her. Now it's almost time to feed her again but it won't be a dream feed at this rate. What do I do and what am I doing wrong?

[creations]

Hi there
We are in different time zones so your last message was 2.30am my time and I was tucked up in bed.
I hope your night went reasonably well.

I'm sure you aren't doing anything wrong xx  Your LO is so new, it takes time for her to settle into this new world and she hasn't read the BW books so she doesn't have the inside information.
Settling into a routine takes some time, learning independent sleep takes more time, it is a skill that you will gently teach her.  Right now she likely wants to be cuddled and fall to sleep on you, it's perfectly normal as she has had such a cosy home for 9 months and got to know you really well in that time so she feels safe in your arms.
Despite Tracy (author of the BW books) describing how to begin EASY with your LO the moment they arrive home from hospital you will discover here that most parents do not begin then but get through those early weeks in any way you can.  If you get through the day by rocking her to sleep or having her sleep on you don't feel bad about it, you won't have broken anything, any props or accidental parenting can be looked at later on.  These early days are very hard work for parents, exhausting, so do what you need to do to get through.  Never regret cuddling even if it becomes a prop for sleep, the bonding that takes place in that time is precious, your DD will learn that you are there for her and this is so important.

Don't panic about the DF being a DF.  The idea of it is so LO is fed before you go to bed so that you get a decent (not so decent in those very early weeks though) stretch of sleep before the next feed.  Not all LOs go for it and if she is awake and it comes up to a feed time it's totally ok to just go ahead and feed her, you are not doing anything wrong.

It initially sounded like there weren't any sleep issues but I see she is fighting sleep sometimes.
It would be useful if you posted a real day's EAS so we could have a look at what is happening.  Don't worry that it is not the times written in the BW book or if things look a bit off track, just write down what happens when for a few days.  This observation period is what advised anyway when beginning a routine.  See where you are starting from and take it from there.  In the early days (and with any changes in routine) it is really useful to keep a log of the EAS every day.  Just write down what time you feed her and what time she falls asleep and wakes up.  If she wakes after a very short nap but you are able to get her back to sleep it's useful to know the times of these too.

Are you using the 4 S routine for wind down at bed time and naps? Read it here:
http://babywhispererforums.com/index.php?topic=212645.0

And again, don't worry.  Just take things one step at a time and try to get some rest for yourself too.
xx