Author Topic: Offer an alternative? (Read 5054 times)

Maxdrewe · « **on:** August 30, 2012, 17:16:26 pm »

Hi all

My LO is 15 months and a bit lazy when it comes to real food. I tried him on fish fingers tonight for the 2 nd time ( 1st time he did ok) he refused and wouldn't eat any so I persevered for a bit then moved onto normal pudding and didn't offer an alternative.

He has been super grumpy since!! Should I offer an alternative ? I really don't want to get into him deciding no and me cooking alternatives but I am worried about him being hungry.

Buntybear · « **Reply #1 on:** August 30, 2012, 17:27:19 pm »

Did you give him anything alongsie the fish fingers? Potatos or veg? I would have given more of them to fill him up.

Maxdrewe · « **Reply #2 on:** August 30, 2012, 17:47:55 pm »

He had pasta bits and peas and he wouldn't eat anything- he would much rather me feed him I think. He usually likes peas but just wouldn't play ball even if I tried to feed him and share a plate- nothing worked

Buntybear · « **Reply #3 on:** August 30, 2012, 19:44:37 pm »

Not sure where you are but if in uk too late now but I would have given a bowl of porridge or some toast as a snack I think.

clairebear79 · « **Reply #4 on:** August 30, 2012, 20:03:00 pm »

Personally, I wouldn't make a habit of offering alternatives - it can become a bit of a trap, particularly if you have a fussy eater. I made that mistake & learnt the hard way its not a good idea! That said, if he was teething/off colour I probably would offer him something else a little later, but try & make it separate from dinner time, so he doesn't think if he refuses his dinner he will get XYZ. When offering a new food, it can be a good idea to serve it alongside something you know he likes, so there is still something else he can eat if he's not so keen on the new food, yk?

Maxdrewe · « **Reply #5 on:** August 30, 2012, 20:58:55 pm »

We are in uk- he had fruit and 2x petit filous + he still has a bedtime bottle. It is a hard one as he is picky and if I offer spagetti Bol he will lap it up but finger food he won't- he does for snak but won't for a meal. He also won't eat a piece of fruit other than grapes, blueberries and raisins. They are funny things

Maxdrewe · « **Reply #6 on:** August 30, 2012, 20:59:29 pm »

Not sure what to do if he wakes hungry in the night ?

Buntybear · « **Reply #7 on:** August 30, 2012, 21:08:57 pm »

It so such a tough one. I know that the rule of thumb is don't offer alterntives but I could not face Olly waking hungry in the night - and he was fussy. I just used to make him what I knew he liked TBH. Then offer fish fingers alongside something you know he does like. Maybe offer it at lunch time and make sure he has a big dinner so he doesn't go hungry? Also offer finger foods you know he will eat at snack at dinner time.

Maxdrewe · « **Reply #8 on:** August 30, 2012, 21:13:02 pm »

That's a good idea- I will try tomorrow- so if I am feeding him risotto give him somethink finger foody to try first?? If he wakes hungry do I go down the bottle route?

Buntybear · « **Reply #9 on:** August 30, 2012, 21:16:30 pm »

Yeah, or just leave finger food on the side. Do you give him another spoon to play with when you feed him? Maybe it is worth encouraging some really messy play so he gets used to getting his hands dirty and involved? lol

Err, not sure on the bottle. If he is hungry then I know I would have given a feed! Others may disagree

creations · « **Reply #10 on:** August 30, 2012, 22:29:32 pm »

Quote from: Maxdrewe on August 30, 2012, 21:13:02 pm

If he wakes hungry do I go down the bottle route?

Do LOs that age still wake up hungry in the night?
Maybe, perhaps I'm naive? Even if mine didn't eat his dinner I wouldn't expect him to wake in the night.
Your LO knows there is a BT bottle so he is already being offered an alternative in a sense. Mine gets a sippy of milk with his last solids meal of the day (no BT milk). I tend to give him food I know he likes (but then he isn't really fussy so that's not too hard) but if he isn't in the mood for the solids he can have his milk. He generally only takes 1-2 oz of milk from the sippy but if he wanted more I'd let him have it.

I don't think he'll wake up (wishful thinking?) but might take a bigger breakfast in the morning x

Maxdrewe · « **Reply #11 on:** August 31, 2012, 11:26:32 am »

He slept until 6:40 ( result) ate an ok breakfast but not wanting snack or much lunch- no idea what's going on.

creations · « **Reply #12 on:** August 31, 2012, 17:47:22 pm »

Glad to hear he had a good night.

Do you think he might be teething or perhaps have a cold/virus? Sometimes a drop in appetite is the first sign my LO is coming down with something. I wouldn't worry too much so long as he has something, and fluids. He'll probably make up for it in a few days and eat the fridge clean.
x

Lemonthyme · « **Reply #13 on:** September 01, 2012, 15:55:15 pm »

One thing I've been noticing with my 2 year old is unless things are as he wants them, he won't eat but won't necessarily tell me why so he sometimes won't eat if somethings on a plate rather than in a bowl or if he's on a grown up chair rather than in his high chair (we're kind of transitioning out of the high chair right now). The 'rules' seem to change daily but I try not to make a fuss, say "would you like a bowl?" or "would you like a different spoon?" and if he doesn't eat, it gets taken away, whatever I'd planned for pudding he still gets if he wants it then that's it. I wouldn't get into the habit of offering alternatives.

Shiv52 · « **Reply #14 on:** September 01, 2012, 19:03:07 pm »

Quote from: creations on August 30, 2012, 22:29:32 pm

Quote from: Maxdrewe on August 30, 2012, 22:13:02 PM
If he wakes hungry do I go down the bottle route?
Do LOs that age still wake up hungry in the night?
Maybe, perhaps I'm naive? Even if mine didn't eat his dinner I wouldn't expect him to wake in the night.

At this age I would't offer a MOTN feed. Even if they eat poorly they should be ok. And the problem is if you start feeding then they are less hungry in the day and then won't eat and the cycle continues.

I also didn't offer alternatives, never have. Some days my DD2 ate very very little but very little i could do about it so we just got on with the day. Then a few days later she'd eat all round her. Offering alternatives can be very tricky as it can make a fussy eater much much fussier in the long term. If we had a disastrous dinner I sometimes offered weetabix or porridge before bed.

Can he feed himself with a spoon well?

does he like dips? I found mine ate fruit more readily when they could dip it in yogurt or a dip with fish fingers always helped them go down well.

creations · « **Reply #15 on:** September 02, 2012, 10:14:24 am »

Quote from: Shiv52 on September 01, 2012, 19:03:07 pm

does he like dips?

My DS asks for dips frequently. I'm not big on condiments, I only have ketchup once in a blue moon so it's never on the table or in sight but as soon as he got the idea of 'dipping' (bread into houmous for example) he wanted a dip with most meals. Half the time he asks for dip and then starts eating the food whilst I am getting the dip, then hardly dips once he has it on his plate. I see it as his desire to have some say over his food, some independent thought and decision making iyswim.
I always wait until he asks for dip and then put just half a teaspoon of mayo or ketchup on his plate.

Maxdrewe · « **Reply #16 on:** September 04, 2012, 19:17:59 pm »

We are definatley making progress. He ate part of a banana and plum for tea + breaded chicken, spagetti hoops and scrambled egg. He isn't great with a spoon but he is working on it! He loves hummus and we are making progress by putting a mix of new and favourite foods. He is being fussy with baby foods at nursery so we are moving him up to more normal food :0/

Shiv52 · « **Reply #17 on:** September 04, 2012, 19:48:58 pm »

GREAT progress!!!!! Well done. Its all small steps xxx

Maxdrewe · « **Reply #18 on:** September 30, 2012, 10:58:52 am »

It's so odd- my LO seems to not want to eat at lunchtime at home- ok at nursery?? He is just not interested- I can just about manage to get him to eat a bit if I give him toys etc. yesterday and today he ended up being sick- no idea???

Lemonthyme · « **Reply #19 on:** September 30, 2012, 16:57:39 pm »

Personally I don't let my son actively have toys during meal times. I think it's important to separate them but I know the desire to get anything working.

Slightly different idea, could you get a big plastic table cloth, clear away toys and put it on the lounge carpet and have an indoor 'picnic' lunch?

Also I found for ages my son would eat lunch later at nursery than he'd manage at home. At home he would be ready for a nap so he would be having lunch at nursery at noon and lunch at home at 11:15 (which got gradually pushed to 11:30 and now nearer 11:45.)

Maxdrewe · « **Reply #20 on:** September 30, 2012, 17:44:53 pm »

He ate loads tonight- maybe I need to push his lunch later?

Lemonthyme · « **Reply #21 on:** September 30, 2012, 19:18:56 pm »

Yeah, try later or earlier maybe? Or maybe set up cues for when it's lunchtime like you would for bedtime. Could he just be too busy playing?

Not that I'm great at this, sometimes I need to go and show him the food and say "look this looks tasty" and fortunately he's quite a greedy boy so he goes for it most of the time.

creations · « **Reply #22 on:** October 01, 2012, 06:43:46 am »

Quote from: Maxdrewe on September 30, 2012, 10:58:52 am

my LO seems to not want to eat at lunchtime at home- ok at nursery?

Are you eating with him at home?
I think sometimes at groups or nursery they see everyone else sitting for their food, and eating, and it encourages them to eat. Humans tend to be social eaters, we eat more when other people are eating with us.

I agree with LT that cues for lunch time are helpful (cues for anything give them a chance to prepare for it). And moving times can help too. We still have a pretty 'odd' meal time at around 3pm because this is when DS tends to be at his hungriest. It's our 'big' meal of the day where as the earlier lunch around 11.30/12.00 is sometimes more snack based while we are out and his later meal at 6.15 he sometimes eats loads other times not so much.

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Author Topic: Offer an alternative? (Read 5054 times)