3 week old - is this excessive?

[besjoux]

My baby just turned 3 weeks old and she is amazing in every way except sleep at night. She is up every 2 hours from 8 until 12 or 1 and the she is up every hour. She feeds really well and is gaining weight well. She is breast fed and we do cosleep at night. However, we have tried putting her in the bassinet and she doesn't improve. Naps are amazing in the morning. She will sleep anywhere for 2 hours.

Does she have nights and days mixed up? I understand lack of sleep is to be expected but this feels pretty extreme right now. She's my 3rd baby too and either I don't remember or she's a lot worse.

[Me.and.my.two.boys]

Oh honey, (((hugs))) I don't have much advice except that I am only a few weeks away from your situation and I'm hoping things go smoothly! Are you getting a break when she naps?

[besjoux]

No, she doesn't like to nap when my boys do....go figure. Hubby and I need to, at least, find a solution to work as a team so that we aren't both exhausted. he has a 45 minute commute so I hate that he's so tired....and I have 2 other LO's to deal with during the day and when I'm this tired my fuse is short. I know that this, too, shall pass but boy is it hard! I am happy to say that we are confident this is #done We love her so much but we are getting way too old for this

[becj86]

Are you cluster feeding through the afternoon? Sounds like she's doing her own natural cluster feeds, but when you'd like her to be sleeping...

She could be switching day and night, or just shifting her night to 12-12 rather than 7-7. Are you taking her outside in her first A time of the day? That can often help. Its hard to say push A time because she's so young, so really its just about making sure she doesn't sleep more than 2hr at a time during the day and getting those cluster feeds in a little earlier. She may be hungry at that point as late in the day, supply often drops quite naturally - you may be able to try resting as much as you can in the afternoon and drinking plenty of water to keep your supply up in the later part of the day.

[besjoux]

Yes, I should have mentioned that. Because of these issues I never let her go more than 2 hours during the day for a feed. Sometimes she eats more often than that and at night she's nursing non-stop. Though last night I had to get out grocery shopping so she was pretty upset with DH during baths because she wanted to eat. Once I got home (only took 1 1/2 hours) she ate and fell asleep. It probably would have been better to give her a bottle while I was gone. We also give her 2 oz of EBM at night so she sleeps more. She does seem to want to fall asleep at 7 PM. I try to get her to stay up until 8 so that we can go to sleep with her but that doesn't always work.

I will try to take her outside this morning. Problem is that she is up now (was up at 5:30 AM because I gave up on keeping her and myself asleep) and it's too dark and cold to be outside.

[becj86]

Oh, what's your supply like? Is she feeding off both sides at a feed? Is she fully draining one breast before switching?

DS wanted to feed a lot but it made his gas heaps worse and he was wanting to feed to relieve the pain from the gas so it was a vicious cycle.

If she wants to go to sleep at 7, put her down then. She may be waking frequently in the early part of the night from being overtired.

No point going outside in the dark - its about letting her see the sun

[besjoux]

My supply was bad but now I am taking a lactation aid and domperidone. it's great now and she gained over 1lb in a week! We are doing really well in this department now. She does feed from both sides at night but she doesn't drain both. We never have gas problems and she's not at all fussy...she just wakes a lot. I guess I should be thankful that she's a happy baby She really is an easy baby, very content. What's funny is that my boys were fussy and had reflux but slept pretty good (or maybe I just forgot how hard it was in the early weeks).

She is better in the early part of the night, it does go downhill from 12 or 1 until we wake in the AM. She, at least, gets a good 2 hour stretch in the early part of the night but from 12 or 1 until we get up she's up every hour or more.

[becj86]

Are you engorged at that feeding around 12/1am after she's had a longer stretch? Just wonder if she's taking in a bit of air when feeding...

There may be a level of underlying discomfort, I wouldn't say it screams reflux as she's so little she may need to be feeding that frequently, but maybe reflux will rear its head in a few more weeks as it tends to get worse up til 4 months.

Why its important to drain the first one is that there's a lot more fat in the milk the closer the breast is to being drained and that then takes longer to digest than the more watery milk.

[besjoux]

It's so hard to know if she has completely drained. Maybe I should get up in the rocking chair and feed her so I am more awake....problem is that it's then harder for me to fall asleep, easier when I bring her to bed to sleep. I really have a hard time knowing what I am doing or what I did soemtimes because I am so tired. Her doctor did say that she, too, willl probably have reflux since the boys did. My 2nd was not as fussy as my sensitive 1st (who was very stressful and cried a LOT)...but once we got him on the right reflux meds he went from 7 NWings to 2 in 2 days.

[Erin M]

My ds was up like yours in the early days from around 9/10 PM until 3/4 AM every night at that age.  It was really hard.  He slept like a log during the day, totally day/night reversed.  I found that keeping him out and about during the day was what helped us (though who knows, from what I've read babies pretty much outgrow it by 6 weeks).  Establishing a bt routine early on was really good for us too, kind of drawing the line between day and night.

[besjoux]

I just noticed that since last night was so brutal I could NOT get her to wake up again until now (10 AM). Everyday is a bit different except I LIKE to get outside during her morning nap which today has to be delayed because she slept in so long. And she sleeps SO SOUNDLY when she wants to. I guess I need to just work on getting our days and nights figured out.

is it best to keep he awake in the AM or PM, which helps to solve the nighttime sleep? I have to pick my battles now to avoid OT, though nothing bothers this baby except when she wants to eat

[Erin M]

I'd say the morning would be good to have her awake, but I'll tell you that I could NOT wake my ds up when he was that age when he wanted to sleep.  It was pretty much impossible.  She'll start waking up more in the coming weeks and it will be easier to have her awake when she *should* be awake.  I honestly don't know if anything I did helped him get through it quicker, but I do know that he did get there somewhere around 6 weeks or so. 

[besjoux]

Thank you Erin! Now I just have to find a way to convince DH not to create sleep associations. She hates the car seat but loves to be bounced on an exercise ball or worn. I remember this caused so many problems with my boys. But the 1st 6 weeks are so hard. I just do whatever works to survive.

[Erin M]

But the 1st 6 weeks are so hard. I just do whatever works to survive.

And don't forget that this is 100% totally, completely, absolutely OK.  The rest will come with time.  Survival is the most important thing right now.