Club for sleep deprived mums of 6 & 7 month olds!

[Jaxsta81]

Hi ladies,
From looking on the forum I think a lot if us are struggling with our 6 & 7 month olds and NWs.

I thought it might be an idea to make a bit of a club offering support and encouragement and any tips you might have discovered along the way.

Who wants to join?!!?

[Jo1stbaby]

Hi,

Can I join, my LO is almost 8 months but I've had terrible issues with nw.  We seem to take 1 step forward and 2 back.  2 nights ago we had s really good night for my LO. Early bed, dream feed at 9pm, wake up at 11pm for ten mins no reason, 3am wake up for bottle.  Then I sat with her for 20 mins at 4.20am to get her past her 4.30 ew, which worked as she slept until 6.20am. 
Last night disaster, nw every hour and 4.30 ew. 

There are so many if us in the same boat and I must admit at 4.30am I have cried from the lack if sleep and the worn out factor. 

[Jaxsta81]

Me too! On Sat morning after 6 wks of my son not sleeping past 4/4.30 am I walked into our bedroom and my husband said "everything ok?" And I just burst into tears and wailed "I am so sick of this! I don't know what I'm doing wrong!!!". My husband got up and gave me a cuddle and said "he's a baby, you're not doing anything wrong" but I can't help feeling like I am.

He is a dream baby in the day, does 2 1.5 hr naps in the day and apart from teething fussing he's no bother. So I know I should take my positives and be thankful for them but so hard when you're so sleep deprived.

This is harder than when he was a newborn!!!

[Jo1stbaby]

I totally agree, Jessica has always been difficult, colic, reflux not sleeping unless APing in arms.  But at night she did always use to sleep well but now it's awful.  What doesn't help is when my sis in law said she shouldn't be waking up at night and shouldn't be having a bottle now and it needs to be sorted.  Does she think we haven't tried?  This coming from the lady who's daughter (she has 4 kids) didn't sleep at all as a baby only in ten minute bouts, I think people have short memories and we need support not putting down an being made out that we are not doing the job right.

Like your husband said your LO is a baby and everyone is different, my friends LO is a day you get but completely different, sleeps a lot and she has no trouble yet he's not long rolled over, my jess has been crawling since 6 months and is cruising around the sofa, bookshelves etc.  my conclusion is she thinks why sleep when there is so much to explore, such different babies.
 

[Jaxsta81]

God I know. My son sat up really early, 5 months, but hasn't done anything else really. Can only roll front to back and not the other way round. Probably a good thing as I'm weaning him off his woombie now and had he rolled sooner we could have had ANOTHER sleep problem to deal with!

They are all different and that's why this is so hard.

I just found a page on here about gradual withdrawal - have you seen it??? Don't know how to do links - think it was in the FAQ bit. I might start doing that for the dummy as I think that's an issue as he needs it to fall asleep most of the time and can't put it back in himself and knocks it out with his one exposed arm (as I say we're weaning him!) and gets all frustrated and ruins any sleepiness he might have been creating!

[Jaxsta81]

Here! Gentle Removal Plan

[Charjanemom]

I will join! We had a sttn baby since 1.5 months old. Only woke once in the night till she turned 6 months. She just turned 7 months and we either have NW or Ew. I'm so tired and also feeling sad cuz I feel like I just can't figure this out! My hubby keeps saying babies aren't robots and she is going to do what she is going to do. Now I keep waking before 530 laying waiting to see if she is going to wake. I feel bad because I think my dd looks tired. I used to have to wake this kid up in the mornings. I just hope it's a phase for all of us. There are too many moms on here with the same issue which makes me think this is partly development.

[Jaxsta81]

It's got to be. I also think teething here is playing a massive part. But I find it hard to believe teething has caused this same problem every night for several weeks-there must be something else at play here. 

It's impossible to not make this about you and what you coulda/shoulda done somewhere along the line. I've been berating myself for giving him a dummy because now I have to get up and put it back in, for starting him on the woombie as now I'm having to wean him off that, for not being able to hear him cry for more than 1 second. BUT I have to remind myself that those props made him a great sleeper from the get go, and have served a great purpose so I shouldn't berate myself or them for now being something we need to think about getting rid of. I was one of those mums that had a sleeping baby at 2 months in his own crib whilst my friends were still talking about co-sleeping and night feeds.

My Dad sleeps very badly and he said to me the other day "when I have a bad night, I just get up at whatever time it is and get on with it and don't think about it again" and I've been trying to adopt this philosophy. I've been getting out and about in the day and acting like I'm fully refreshed and spritely and I do actually think it's really helping my mood because otherwise you could just stay in all day and despair about how sh*t the situation is. Don't get me wrong - I'm not that strong at 4am. I have been known to cry and rock my baby to sleep. 

I also nap when he naps - unashamedly. And I go to bed at 9/9.30pm. My poor hubby. We had to slot in some afternoon loving this weekend as I'd been totally neglecting him!!

[Jaxsta81]

Now I keep waking before 530 laying waiting to see if she is going to wake

I so do this too. I also hear phantom snuffles or noises which jolt me awake. Annoying.com!

[Charjanemom]

I know and my hubby lays there snoring and I'm so jealous that he can sleep. This morning I woke at 330!! Ugh

[Jaxsta81]

Me too - 2.50am, back to sleep for about an hour and stay started at 5.20am. Hubby has only got up once to help out in the night. I'm making him sound like an A-hole but he's really not, he is just like a teenager with his sleep.

[Charjanemom]

Ya it's mommy brain. I guess it can't turn off. Good news here. We had no teething upsets in the night and she woke at 6 rather than 530 but stayed in her crib resting and in and out of sleep till 640. I did wake to sleep at 430 so maybe it worked!??

[missmom]

I'll join! I could really use the support. I'm so sick of helpful mothers saying asinine things like "just try for two long naps" Oh geez why didn't I think of that or "oh well some babies don't sleep"  Well I with he'd tell me how he does it, because I'm a wreak without it. 

I feel like complete RUBBISH at this mom thing.  He doesn't sleep EVER, never has, bad days, bad nights since the first night he was born.  His recovery sleep after 56 hours of labour was only 4 hours for pete's sake!  Should've known I was in for it then.  I've tried everything, you name it I've tried it, swaddle, swing, white noise, gripe water, gas drops, reflux meds (all types, all doses), black out curtains, rocking, co-sleeping, baby wearing, feeding solids, bottle feeding, pacifiers, osteopaths, cluster feeding, dream feeding, teaching him to fall asleep on his own (which he does just fine), making no noise, making plenty of noise, a wide assortment of schedules and activities, humidifiers, a range of sleeping temperatures, tylenol, teething medication (just in case), WTS.  I even spent 5 days at sleep school and all they could say is, my he is a very unsettle baby.  That is super helpful, thank you so much Captain Obvious!

It's just a huge relief to hear of other mothers going through this although I'm blatantly jealous of those of you with nappers, and those of you whose little ones use to sleep.  I'm also terrified when I see a mother with a 15 month old whose still going through this.  The though makes me tear up! God I miss sleep, and showers, and eating hot food...

[Jaxsta81]

Missmom, that sounds horrific!! Poor you!! You really have tried everything!

So, does he just micro nap in the day? Surely he can't not sleep all day?! Is that even humanly possible?

Is he in a good mood with the little sleep?

Do you have friends or family to support you? Where do you live?

Sorry for the questions!!

[Jo1stbaby]

I had a look at that gentle removal plan.  I'm not sure whether to wean the dummy (paci) or not.  She's not overly bothered most of the time and she puts it in herself or yaws it our when she doesn't want it.  I went cold turkey on the swaddle because she started rolling over and getting up on her knees.  Should have done it before but she's such a fighter when it comes to sleep I just thought my bad naps and nights would just be worse.  In actual fact it took a couple of days but he is so much better without it she prefers to sleep on her front and even cries so writes if you put her on her back.

Missmom I am so with you I only just at about 6 1/2 months got my LO to start taking naps, I had to ap and it was a fight all the way just to sleep 1/2 hr. nighties at one point were pretty good I did t do dream feed and shed go to bed at 7pm wake about 12/1pm wake at 7am, that only lasted a matter of weeks now a good night for me is dreamfeed at 9pm (when I put her to bed an hour earlier than normal put her to bed at 6pm), quick wake up at 11pm resettled after 10 mins, bottle at 3pm and then sit there holding her hand or hand on back for 29 mins at 4.20am to get past 4.30 ew and then she slept until 6.20.  When I told someone that they said that's a good night?? Yes it is for Jessica.
Naps are hit and miss today I got a half hour nap then an hour and a half later I got 1 1/2hrs but that's rare.  I so wish there was done magic spell to help them sleep even if it was once a week just so I could catch up.  It's the 4.30am ew in struggling with. I can't nap when she does as she is so unpredictable an half hour is not even worth me trying.