3,5 months old sleep getting worse

[Frenchinoslo]

Hi dear mums,

I have 3 children and I am supposed to know about it but I am still lost... The first 6 months of my two first daughters have been horrible and I don't want to be in that with my son. I hope you will be able to help me.
My son is 15 weeks now. He is sleeping during the day in the bassinet (but not in the stroller except when I am out with him) and during the night in his crib.

After a first difficult months because of colics and gaz, he slept very well during the night until he was 12 weeks old. There was always more than 6 hours between 2 feeds (and wakings) during the night, sometimes even 8 hours. At this time, the naps were more difficult and he was sleeping several of them wrapped with me or his father.

Between 12 weeks and 14 weeks, the days became wonderful, with all the naps in the bassinet (but not walking) and no use of baby carrier and wrap anymore. But he was waking up every 3 to 4 hours during the night. When he was waking up, I was breastfeeding him and he was back to sleep without any problem. Just the nights were more difficult than before. At the beginning I thought that it was a growth spurt, but it was like that for 3 weeks which seems to be too much for a growth spurt. At this time, he was on a 3 hours EASY rutine, and I tried to extend a little bit the activity time to see if it was helping. This started with the clock change end of october. I don't know if it can be related as I live in Scandinavia wher it is now really dark.

But since saturday, it is getting worse. The days are still wonderful, he is always happy, easy to fall asleep and having good activity time. But the nights are getting horrible. He is now waking up every 2,5 hours. I am not sure that he is hungry so often as during the day, he is more now on a 3,5 h routine and he could even be on a 4 hours sometimes. The main change that has happened is that he was sleeping during the night in a specific pillow called cocoonababy where he was like in a nest or a cocoon and we had to give it back to the people who lend it to us.
He was using a dummy only during the day until now. I tried to give him the dummy during the night to resettle him. He seems to be comforted, but he cries again 5 to 10 minutes after. The nights are a bit better if he sleeps in the bassinet instead of the crib, but not much.

A last point, the feeds are very very short during the day, sometimes 3 minutes each side. During the night, it can be until 10 minutes each side, but not really more. But I can still pump something like 40 to 60 mL milk after a feed so I don't think it is because I have not enough milk. He is very tall for his age, but was already tall and big at birth.

Now I don't know what to do. Is it hunger or not? (I have read in one post that you advise to feed the baby if he wakes up after 3 or 4 hours or if he wakes up again less than 30 minutes after having been resettled). Is the dummy a prop for him (during the night, he falls asleep on his own, during the day, most of the time with the pacifier)? Is it a development gap and if yes what can I do? Do I have to feed him during the night, to resettle him with the pacifier or by another way? I have never managed to do shh pat. Is ot too early for PU/PD? Do I have to change his EASY schedule (which is not so easy with my other children)?

I write you here an example of his last days, which are not always the same depending how much I am out during the day beacause he falls asleep as soon as he is in the stroller, even if it is activity time.

8:35 E
9:00 A
10:00 S (we had to go out)
12:00 E
12:15 A
13:45 S
15:10 E (I woke him up because I wanted to feed him before leaving)
15:20 A
16:00 S (my husband had to go out with him)
18:15 E
18:45 A
20:15 S
21:30 E
22:00 S
00:00 wake up and then several wakes up until 1:10
1:10 E
1:35 S
3:45 wake up, ressetled in the bassinet
4:00 S
6:00 E

next day
6:00 E
6:30 S
8:20 E (very long feed)
9:10 A
10:00 S
11:25 E
11:30 A
11:50 S (I had to go out)
12:15 A (did not want to eat)
13:00 E
13:10 A
13:30 S
15:40 E
15:55 A
16:30 S (I had to go out to pick up my children)
17:30 A
18:45 E
19:00 A
20:00 S
22:15 DF (but we don't manage not to wake him up...)
22:40 S
00:30 wake up, sleep again with the pacifier, and this 3 times until 2:30
2:30 E
3:00 S
4:45 wake up, sleep again in the bassinet
6:15 E
6:45 A
8:00 S
10:00 E
10:10 A
10:55 : S (I had to go)
12:15 E
12:30 A
13:15 S
15:10 E
15:25 A
16:35 S (I had to leave to pick up my children)
18:20 E (I woke him up)
18:32 A
20:15 S
23:30 E
23:55 S
2:15 woke up and at 2:30
3:30 E (diapers and clothes to be changed because of leakage)
4:25 S (perhaps some waking ups, I don't remember)

And today
6:30 E
6:50 A
8:00 S
10:45 E
10:55 A
12:15 S (in the stroller)
14:50 E
15:05 A

Sorry, it is a bit long... Thank you very much for your help.

Alex

[becj86]

Given he was sleeping well in the cocoonababy, I think it could just be a matter of feeling less secure - are you swaddling? I'd say it'd be worth keeping him in the bassinet for a while if he's not too big.

Yes, it's too early for PUPD.

Is he sleeping right up to the next E you've posted? Are you having to resettle naps?

What's your supply/letdown like? Anything here ring a bell? http://kellymom.com/bf/got-milk/supply-worries/fast-letdown/
Are you ensuring each breast is drained before switching to the next, even if it means starting the next feed with the breast you offered at the last feed? I wonder if you're seeing symptoms of foremilk overload or overactive letdown - gas, sore tummy. What are his poos like?

[Frenchinoslo]

Thank you for your answer.

Yes I swaddle him, but my blanket is now a bit small so I was wondering if it was worth going on. I suppose it is.
Yes, he is sleeping up to E time, otherwise I have added an intermediary A time in my post.
Sometimes I have to ressettle for naps, sometimes not. I do it with the pacifier and a little bit rocking but I am stopping the rocking before he is fast asleep. I don't manage to sh / pat...

About my supply, I was more concerned about not having enough milk or whether my son was not a bit lazy and stopping to eat when the supply was not quick enough (sorry for my english). I did not think about fast letdown. I will pay attention to it for the next feeds. But yes, he has a lot of smelly gaz (that my daughters were not having), but not painful. He was having sore tummy in the 2 first months, but not anymore. He cries very little. He strangles also.
He cries when I approach the boob, even before the milk is going out. Then he is a little more calm. And then he is fussy again. He pulls off the breast often while nursing, sometimes the milk is going out but sometimes I have the feeling that it is because the mile is not coming quick enough. He needs to burp in the middle of the feed. And he spits off almost every time, but not very much in quantity. He periodically refuses to nurse and he does not like comfort nursing. Feeds are easier during the nigt, and are easier if he is swaddled. Can it be linked? Often I am giving him the pacifier during the feed when he wants to stop, and then he accepts to suck again.
And poos are every 6 days only, quite thick and yellow to orange.

I am also thinking about weaning him from the pacifier. He is normally not using it during the night as he falls asleep very quickly after the feed, even if not on the boob. But during the day, he always needs the pacifier, even if he can fall asleep quite easily in his bouncing chair or on the playmat with the pacifier.

Thank you very muck for your answers and your help.

Alex

[becj86]

strangles

I speak a little french - what's the word in french?

He cries when I approach the boob, even before the milk is going out. Then he is a little more calm. And then he is fussy again. He pulls off the breast often while nursing, sometimes the milk is going out but sometimes I have the feeling that it is because the mile is not coming quick enough. He needs to burp in the middle of the feed. And he spits off almost every time, but not very much in quantity. He periodically refuses to nurse and he does not like comfort nursing. Feeds are easier during the nigt, and are easier if he is swaddled. Can it be linked?

Absolutely, it could be an issue. Keep in mind that he's getting directly on the back of his throat the milk as it is about 1cm from your nipple.

Have a read here and see if you think anything else sounds more like what's going on: http://kellymom.com/bf/concerns/child/fussy-while-nursing/

[Frenchinoslo]

Hi again,

Sorry for my silence, I did not have a lot of time in the last days, the whole family was sick...
Well, it is not really better. The link you gave me is really interesting. But I don't know what to do because it is a little bit alltogether (perhaps fast let down, but not always, impatience, need to burp, difference between the two sides...). But he pees also a lot (I have to change him before and after every feed if I don't want a leakage. And as he used to poo once a week, it is now once a day.
So I really think he has enough to eat.

But he is still waking at least twice per night. He is now on a 3,5 hours rutine but wakes up every 2,5 hours during the night.
He is now 4 months old, so I don't know if it is the best period to deal with that because of the growth spurt. Last night, he was really hungry, but the 2 nights before, he just needed to be resetteled. So it is hard to find a general patern.

How can I know that he has enough to eat during the day and that it is not because of that that he wakes up during the night? With the diapers? Coul it help if I pump my link a little bit during the day and give him a bottle of my milk in the evening to know how much he takes? Am I supposed to continue with cluster feedings on the evening at 4 months?

About the pacifier, how can I know if it is a prop or not and if I have to whean it? During the night he does normally not have it, just during the day. And I am trying to do the gentle removal plan. But when he wakes up during the night and he it is less that 3,5 hours he has eaten, I first try to give him the pacifier, and levae it to him because I am too tired to stay with him. And if he wakes up again some minutes after, I feed him. Is it OK?

About the rutine, he does not manage to do the catnap because there is too much activity with his sisters at home, and I don't have so many time to deal with that with dinner, baths... Perhaps is he overtired or overstimulated during the last partof the day?
We put him in bed at aroud 8:00 and he wahes up in the morning at 6:45. Is it too late in the evening? It is not so easy to manage 3 children at the same time...

He never sleeps more than 2 hours (for naps or during the night), perhaps because I have waken him up when the naps were more than 2 hours, so he does not know how to do now?
We have stopped the DF (which was not really a DF as he was completely wet so we had to change him and to wake him up) because it does not really change anything for the rest of the night.

Well, I just don't know where to start to solve the problem, rutine, pacifier, feeds... Do you have any idea?

And a question about EASY, if he does EASAE, how do manage it? Sometimes, he does not mange to sleep until feed time, so he plays a little bit before. But it means that the activity time after the feed will also be shorter and then everything goes wrong.

Thank you very much.

[becj86]

Definitely sounds like your supply is fine and he's getting plenty of milk.

How can I know that he has enough to eat during the day and that it is not because of that that he wakes up during the night?

Its actually quite normal for a baby this age to be taking two night feeds and more if in a growth spurt. The general rule is that if baby can last 4hr between feeds in the day, you don't feed until its been 4hr since the last feed in the night - resettle until then.
Night Feeds and the Breast Fed Baby

Am I supposed to continue with cluster feedings on the evening at 4 months?

You don't have to, but you can. It helped us.

About the rutine, he does not manage to do the catnap because there is too much activity with his sisters at home, and I don't have so many time to deal with that with dinner, baths... Perhaps is he overtired or overstimulated during the last partof the day?

Yes, overtired and overstimulated would be my guess in this case. Do you have a sling or a baby carrier that he could nap in close to you (or just be there and not get so overstimulated) while still leaving your hands free to do dinner prep, look after the other 2 children?

And a question about EASY, if he does EASAE, how do manage it? Sometimes, he does not mange to sleep until feed time, so he plays a little bit before. But it means that the activity time after the feed will also be shorter and then everything goes wrong.

Its fine to do EASAEAS, the basic idea is to prevent feed-sleep association. Keep in mind that if he does a short nap, you need to shorten the A time (A time refers to time from wake up (eyes open) to sleep (eyes shut)) a little so he doesn't get overtired.

We put him in bed at aroud 8:00 and he wahes up in the morning at 6:45. Is it too late in the evening?

It would be better if he slept a little later in the morning or went to bed a little earlier to get as close as possible to a 12hr night. Could you put him down for the night at 6:30 and use white noise to help with the possible disturbance from the noises of the rest of the family? Could you feed him at 6:45 and put him down for more sleep and get him up around 8?