2-1: when does it end? Success stories please!

[lynners]

Straffles - you can sooo put the baby down at the same time once it has stabilised.  MY DS1 had his nap at 12.30 from the time he was about 12 months to when he dropped the nap at just over 3 - that was two glorious years of no A time chasing and just good solid naps, and he would always have 2 1/2 - 3 hours.  Bliss. 

The only time he ever struggled once properly on one nap was if we were out at nap time so I generally avoided that.   And yes that may throw in a very occasional NW or EW, but if I stayed home the next day he would be straight back on track.

It took us about 2 1/2 months to transition - some days two naps, some one with an early BT, but eventually you do get there and trust me life is soooo much easier once they're on one good regular nap.

HTH but feel free to ask anything else.

[jessmum46]

Lynners was your 12.30 nap from a 7am wakeup?  Did you set it there or was that just where it ended up?

[lynners]

Yes it was from a 7.00 wake up.  As his A was increasing during transitioning the nap ended up there and once he was consistently on one nap it stayed there.

I think I remember someone saying when we were going though it that once my LO was on 5 hours A then we could start doing one nap.  I think from that stage some days we were on one and some days two.  Meanwhile his A was increasing and once up to 5 1/2 he was consistently on one nap - then we had the set nap at 12.30 for evermore.

I do feel for you all.  Having just read through my old posts at the time I remember how difficult it was but now he's four that time just seems a blip compared to the two years of one long nap 

My DS2 is only 5 months - got all that to look forward to with him.

[anna*]

Straffles I don't think they necessarily remain exactly the same, but pretty close, and the kid gets more flexible as they get older. By the time my son was 18 months old we pretty much had a set nap of 12.30, because that worked with lunch. By the time he was 2, if he occasionally (OCCASIONALLY) missed his nap, it wasn't the end of the world, though most days he would still sleep 2hrs+. 1 nap didn't solve EWs for him, he was always the king of EWs and nothing solved that until he was 2.

Aishi, I don't think I've ever really managed to get her down much before 6. Thankfully she's not really an EWer, OT tends to be more NWs than EWs with her.

[Straffles]

Thanks for success stories

Please keep them coming. From what I read on this forum, the process of adjusting Atimes, getting short naps and NWs seems to be going on for ever for many people. I just want it OVER with!

[*happy*]

unfortunately....i'm joining the 2-1 dramas!!!!
ugh...we are on a 4hr 50min morning A time....but she refused yesterday's CN of 20 mins....only getting a 2hr 20 min AM nap at the most...is that what you ladies get?
reeeeally looking forward to reading some more success stories!

[mycatmonet]

hi happy! come join us on the 2-1 thread, plenty of discussion there!! A 2h20min nap would be a dream for my DD, we're getting 1h20min atm on one nap (not much chance of DD doing 2 naps), AND short nights here!

[Straffles]

Hi lynners,

We're on 4HR 30 AT and we have no chance of catnaps, so EBT all the way and it doesn't tend to work.

So, my second question to you is: how and when did you know to extend the AT? I thought once the CN was refused, that was time to go ahead and push it. But here we have OT all the time pretty much, so no chance of extending and no sense of when extending Atime would work anyway, if you see what I mean?

thanks all,

I think all of us on the 2to1 thread atm would love to know when the time is right to extend towards 5HRS  as we are all stuck at around 4HR 30 with LOs still struggling...anyone have any advice PLEASE?

[*happy*]

we are managing 4hr 50 at the moment, but we have only had one day of 1 nap so she always has a 20 min CN or 30 mins if hse doesnt do a 2hr AM nap.....maybe i should post in the 2-1 instead.....hold on.....over i go....

[lynners]

Hi Straffles  , 

Just spent some time going over my old posts during the 2-1 days.

One thing that I'd forgotten was that once LO seemed to be refusing the CN, I reduced the second  A time by loads to get one in which helped with OT.  For my LO when we were around 4h30m first A, his second was about 2 -2 1/2 hours.  Took a bit of fiddling about to get it.  If I put him down too early he'd be kicking around for ages and get frustrated,  too late and he'd appear OT and refuse it.  When all you're trying to do is get a CN they don't need to last anywhere near a full A.

HTH.  What do you think?

[Straffles]

thanks lynners

i tried 3.5hours AT to CN yesterday and his AT is 4.5. Maybe I'll have to try 3hours if I need to do it again and see if he'll take it.

EBT is not serving us at all well - we've got long long screaming NWs

[TracyP21]

Hi Straffles, just wanted to send you some ((hugs)) as I have been following the 2-1 thread and reading how hard things are for you at the moment.  I had some threads about three months ago about my 8.5 month old who was jolting awake at 30/35/40 minutes.  I remember what it was like when I was in the middle of OT endless days, constantly worried about naps and then not sleeping myself.  Fast forward three months and we finally have some decent naps happening but also some days of PM nap refusals (hence why I have been following your thread).
Not sure if any of this will be helpful to you but thought I would mention it:
My boy's prop was me rocking him and I used WIWO with him (PD was too stimulating for him).  It was really quick - I would only pop my head in the door and say our sleepy phrase to him and then get out of there until the next time (he would get worked up if I went near the cot or touched him).  It took about a week of doing this constantly at nap time (didn't use it in the night as he was so exhausted he never woke up) and then he got it.  I found it actually easier when he was older (did it at 10 months) because he seemed to get it easier and also I felt I could be a bit tougher since he wasn't such a little baby, if you know what I mean.
We really only got good naps when he started crawling and tiring himself out more.  His AT has only moved up from 3 hours to 3hr30/40 since crawling so maybe Benji needs a drop in AT due to crawling/walking? I have also just found out that he actually needs a slightly shorter 2nd AT (even after a 1hr40 nap) to get a 2nd nap - probably due to this time being busy with errands/lunch/play.
The only other tip I was given that worked as well is that anything to do with water helps tire them out - maybe a bath in the morning/paddling pool outside (I see you in Australia so that could be a good option).
Does Benji have a lovie - that is something that has really helped Reuben.  We only started using this when we started WIWO.  He takes it to bed for naps and bedtime and basically wrestles around with it for a bit and it soothes him.
Finally, can your DP or family/friends give you some "time out" for a couple of hours a couple of times a week so you can take a breather from this until you get through the OT cycle.  I found that invaluable to be able to go out and just wander the shops aimlessly / meet up with a friend and escape the vicious nap cycles for a wee while.
Not sure if any of this will be helpful but just wanted to share as I have picked up tips from your posts.
Take care of yourself and know there are Mum's all over the world here to support you!

[Straffles]

Thank you Tracy. you made me cry just with the support you are offering a stranger. While I am trying to get soome support from my mum, but getting nothing

I am wonderinf where I can get info on WIWO.

Benji definitely won't take two naps any more, not even if the first one has been short. Trying to get him to take two but it's not working and we don't know where else to turn really. Just keep on plugging away at trying to re-settle his naps.

It's a bit of a mess now, as you'll know from the other thread.

My DP helps SOOooo much, but I can't let go of the control and leave Benji! Also am bf-ing ALL the time -he won't leave me alone!

I have wondered a lot about dropping the AM AT btu since he won't take a second nap, am a bit wary of that. Maybe try by 5 mins!!??

[TracyP21]

It is a tricky one, especially if refusing the 2nd nap now.  My boy was so used to existing on short sleeps that he seemed like he was on speed half the time.  I did find it helped pulling back ATs because he was basically so tired from the moment he woke up because he never really caught up.  Hopefully you will get more nap resettles as the time goes on - I know he is a champion napper when he wants to - I used to be sooo jealous of your long naps!

[My DP helps SOOooo much, but I can't let go of the control and leave Benji! Also am bf-ing ALL the time -he won't leave me alone!
quote]
This sounds like he has big time SA going on from you - could you "let go" a bit and leave him with DP - maybe express so if he needs a feed while you are out he is okay.  I felt a lot like this but more often than not he became calmer when I left - couldn't smell milk on DH!  DS also used to "feed" off my anxiety big time so we were always in a bit of a state.  Its a vicious cycle when all you want them to do is sleep and they don't. 

I hope today has been a better day.