Author Topic: Don't even know where to start  (Read 880 times)

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Offline momma.bear

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Don't even know where to start
« on: December 23, 2012, 01:35:26 am »
My son is just over 3 months. His naps are getting worse by the day. He was doing 40-45 minute naps regularly. I have a toddler as well, so sleep training is not easy to do. The other day I let him cry after his 40 minute nap, hoping he'd go back to sleep. I'd pop in when he started to really cry, and eventually he did fall back asleep but not for long. That afternoon he had a 2 hour nap. The next morning he had a great nap again, and the following day he had a good afternoon nap. But ever since then his naps have been getting worse. Yesterday he only had two 40 minute naps, and today was just as bad. He sleeps fine at night, I feed him 1-2 times a night and he has one habitual night waking two hours after his first night feeding, but I can't really complain.
But his naps are driving me crazy. I've tried resettling him by doing pu/pd and shh/pat after the 40 minute mark, but I have a toddler who can't be trusted alone. I know people say that it takes time, and to get help, but I can't give my toddler up for a week to get my son sleep trained! How do others do it? I've read all the links on this board to do with naps, including the sleep interview with Tracy. I'm still at a loss. His A times are 1.5 hours, but shorter after a 40 minute nap, and after that it just gets all messed up. He's not at all miserable during the day, but does need to be held, bounced, and paid attention to a lot when he's not napping.


Offline Aishi

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Re: Don't even know where to start
« Reply #1 on: December 23, 2012, 08:46:10 am »
Hi

We dont advocate CC/CIO on BW as Tracy believed it breaks the bond of trust between baby and mother.

But if you would like help to st lo using gentler methods please post your easy in EAS format so I can see where you may need tweaking.

40 min naps can be UT or OT as your lo is doing the higher end of the average a time for this age and you say he wakes happy from naps he may need a slight increase but post your easy as best as u can and I will be able to advice you better.

Also pupd isn't recommended for 3mo as its to be used as a last resort. ssh pat is a much gentler method and easy to wean lo from. St does take time and consistency and patience. Your lo is still tiny and didn't come programmed knowing how to fall asleep independantly ;) it's a skill like any other that he needs to be taught.

I know it's not easy with two (I have a 2.5yo and 11mo and it was hard work st the baby but she's been an independant sleeper since she was 4 mo so well worth the effort!). It is possible and you can do it x
aishi :)

Offline Papaya

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Re: Don't even know where to start
« Reply #2 on: December 23, 2012, 14:48:40 pm »
Hugs hun. If you post your EAS we can see if we can help with some routine tweaks - but just wondering if you have a baby carrier or sling you could use to AP a few naps when you need to? Or even just to keep DS close to you when he's awake but you need to be looking after your other LO or getting on with other things? You can still work on independent sleep when you can, maybe focusing on one or two naps a day to start with, but it's also ok to AP some naps, particularly the afternoon catnap - sling, stroller, carseat etc :)

xx
*Nuala*










Offline momma.bear

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Re: Don't even know where to start
« Reply #3 on: December 23, 2012, 19:45:03 pm »
I need to figure out how to use my moby wrap with him... 15 lbs. is a lot to carry around! This is the thing... my EASY isn't really existent because his naps are all over the place. He usually wakes up around 7:30/45, and I keep his first A time to 1.5 hours, but after his first short nap, it messes everything up. Also, he often doesn't take a feeding at 7:30 because he'll have had one at 5 or 6am and not be hungry. I always offer him but unless it's been 3 hours, he usually won't feed. The only consistent thing is that he feeds every 3 hours during the day.


Offline Papaya

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Re: Don't even know where to start
« Reply #4 on: December 24, 2012, 02:28:46 am »
Also, he often doesn't take a feeding at 7:30 because he'll have had one at 5 or 6am and not be hungry.

Yeah, this is frustrating - I remember this stage. Can you try offering him a smaller feed at 5/6am, just to tide him over so he'll take something at 7.30? I know my bf LO wasn't terribly impressed when I tried this with her though ;)

So, first nap at 1hr30 A time: how does he settle for this nap, and wake up? Is he happy? It could be that he needs a slight A push (1hr30 is around average, but some LOs need more). OR, it could just be a problem with transitioning, so common at this age. I'd try pushing the A by 10 mins first, and if that doesn't help perhaps try W2S at 35 mins? Option 2 for naps on this link: How do I address habitual wakings? (wake-to-sleep and other methods)
IF it works, it doesn't involve you having to stay with him through transition, so can be a good option with another LO around.
*Nuala*