Is it really so terrible to feed DS in front of the TV?

[Hedgehog17]

DS is 2.25, and has always been a relatively poor eater  He's feeling very skinny right now, and he hasn't grown or put on weight in 3 months 

Today he ate:

4oz milk, 1 adult portion of porridge (made with 6oz milk) - at the table

10 baked beans, 1/2 banana & apricot fruit pouch, 4 toddler biscuits, 1 cup coconut water - at the table

2 raisins, 2/3 After 8 mint - after nap while playing in living room

Some roast duck, then the screwing up of the face and pushing away the bowl and saying no started  - at the table

As lunch was poor, I then let him watch TV and fed him the rest of his duck and a large portion of roast parsnips, followed by 6 tsp goat's yoghurt with honey and 4 toddler biscuits, all eaten happily  Water to drink all day.

6oz milk

So, overall a reasonable intake for the day, but only because he ate his tea in front of the TV!! I know TV dinners are no good, but really, I have to get more calories into him, so is it really so bad to watch 20 mins of TV while getting his dinner into him? He's not eating enough protein, fat and veg unless I do 

I'm pretty desparate here - I'd rather he ate than we keep having eating battles and DH and I getting upset he's not growing 

[Fiver]

*hugs*

Don't know what to say, but mine have the odd meal in front of the TV here and there.  It's not all the time

[twogirlsmommy]

I would say as long as you don't make a habit of it, it should be fine.  DD eats the odd meal infront of the tv but we do try to keep it to the table.

[Mum-of-Two]

We found around that age it worked too. Watch for the fine line between sitting and eating and getting so distracted the eating comes second again!  Good luck!!

[Hedgehog17]

Thanks ladies 

I always start meals at the table, and will try to keep the TV dinners to a minimum! If he's had a good lunch I don't mind if he's fussy about dinner, but if he hasn't then I may need to resort to the TV 

If it's only once or twice a week hopefully that won't be habit forming 

[anna*]

I know it's easy to say but if he's had a good lunch I wouldn't worry too much about tea. It's if he's had a bad lunch AND declining tea is when I'd resort to TV and tricks.

[Tweakster]

Agree ^^  At that age Finn hardly ever ate dinner and in fact, he's only showing interest in dinner these days at nearly 4.  The portions are really really out of whack in our own minds, if you actually saw what a portion size is for a kid, it sounds like he's eating exactly what he should be   I think that's a lot of food you mention up there.

I do note that breakfast was really filling of milk...that's 10 oz of milk plus an adult-size bowl of oatmeal...I mean Tom would be full for hours on that never mind Finn hehe  That's a hearty breakfast and then lunch had a variety of components...that probably makes up a huge chunk of his daily needs.

Re: the growth, I think that's totally normal...Finn stayed the same forever, then growth spurt, then the same, then growth spurt...he's been in the same clothes for over a year now.  Totally normal for the growth to completely stabilize/slow down.  Is your doctor concerned at all?? 

Re: the TV - we do it too, not ideal but in our lifestyle at the moment, we have little option.  Mornings he has a quick bite at the table and then if he wants more bits he can have them while he watches his one show.  Dinner we try to do at the table but if it's a busy/late night, we do a sandwich at the table with his bedtime show.

Maybe for dinner try putting out a 'picnic' spread for him so he can play and nibble as he needs to?  Put out good choices and let him have at it, but don't make it a battle just let him know that the food is there and he can eat or not.  He is not going to starve - honest

[clairebear79]

Agree with wendy thats a hearty breakfast & likely 2 keep him full for a long time.Its also a lot of milk he's having, is that a typical amount for him?  It may be hes overfilling at breakfast so doesnt need so much later on iyswim? If ur really concerned about his food intake, you could always cut out that morning milk, he doesnt need it at this age & it might encourage an increased appetite.

Wrt his weight gain i second what wendy said about it being much slower & often in fits & starts at this age. O gained only 1lb between 1-2yrs & in the last 3 months hes had a huge growth spurt, got a lot taller, outgrown all his toys & gained 3lb in weight! So try not 2 worry too much.

Re tv dinners, imo its ok on occasion. We also do 'picnic lunches' in the living room sometimes, Keeps it interesting. Tbh tho we always have evening meal at table & if he loses interest we say ok & clear the plates. We still have difficult mealtimes where o refuses to eat anything at all & am currently doing a food diary 4 the hv. She said best thing i can do is not stress & not react to him not eating, the more i react or try 2 cajole him the more it becomes an 'issue'. I saw an interesting thread on this the other day i'll try n find the link.

ETA: lol I meant outgrown all his clothes not toys!

[Mom to M&M]

I'm with everyone here. First of all, definitely too much milk in the am. I wouldn't give him more than 4-6 ounces with each meal to be honest (and probably no more than 16 ounces a day total). I'd also limit afternoon snacks so he isn't eating anything (other than maybe veggies) for at least 2-3 hours before dinner.

We sometimes do picnic lunches or dinner, sometimes lunches with songs on. Never TV but that's just a personal pet peeve of mine. I think as long as you are keeping it as an occasional thing and al long as he's not refusing to eat at all unless the V is on than that is OK.

Hugs!

[Hedgehog17]

Thanks Wendy & Claire 

DS had his last growth spurt 2 weeks after his 2nd birthday, and has done nothing since then - he's still only 88cm tall and it's all in his body! His little legs are still really short - his 2-3y trousers are all turned up and they are too big in the waist, but his 18-24mo ones were too tight over his bum so I had to move him up a size 

He got a balance bike for Christmas from my boss, and even at the lowest setting his legs are too short to put his feet on the ground. The bike says it's suitable from 18mo  So I am somewhat concerned - the clothing labels all say 2-3yo clothes are for 92 - 98 cm height and he's 4cm below that!

I will cut out the milk at breakfast if he's having porridge. If he's having something else I'll have to serve milk as well. At the moment it's his best source of protein, as he's so fussy about meat and fish, and is on / off with beans and pulses. He needs protein to grow!!

I've been looking at this site: https://www.infantandtoddlerforum.org/little-peoples-plates which lets you analyse what they've eaten over the day. Our sample day above came out as too much milk, too many sugary / fatty foods, and not enough protein or vegetables  Apparently 8tbsp of porridge is the correct serving for a toddler, and he's only getting slightly more than that 

Here's hoping DS decides to eat more protein and have a growth spurt soon, as I'm worried he'll be a midget 

[Mom to M&M]

Can you add good fats and protein to his porridge? Some mashed avocado? Peanut butter? Coconut oil?

[Hedgehog17]

Oooh - good idea Karen!

I have coconut oil 

[Jimbob]

I would not worry too much about his clothes being the right size for his age. My ds wears age 4-5 trousers and he is 8 years old. He is small for his age but he is growing. He had times where he did not seem to grow at all but he would then have a growth spurt. I know it is hard and I do still worry at times but I do now try to stay relaxed. To be honest my dd is small for her age to but she has had a few growth spurts in the last year and now wears clothes that are age 7-8 for leggings and 8-9 for tops and dresses and she is age 9. My dd did not really have any major eating issues apart from about 6 weeks around the age of 2.

Kelly x

[Tweakster]

Starting at 24 mths is really when eating dropped off for us.  He's never been into breakfast - never hungry upon waking and will still go until 10 or later without requesting food (we do feed him before that though lol).  From 2-3.5 he would eat very well midday and then not be hungry at all after afternoon snack so forgo dinner completely.  I stopped making meals for dinner because DH would also come home after a 'late lunch' at work and not want to eat. 

Since school in September and since taking a packed lunch to school he's now relatively hungry after school often asking 'what are we having, I'm hungry' but he lots of times does not eat his lunch (he claims that they don't have enough time but he just gets sidetracked playing and horsing around with friends). 

Basically, he's 36 lbs and I believe he's been that same weight for at least 6 mths if not more.  His height dropped off - measuring him from July 11 to now, not much change at all.  He's wearing size 3 trousers and size 4 tops and has been all year.  Only yesterday I noticed that his tops are a tad shorter than before so I'll probably move him to 5 for length.

My paed told us at the very beginning do not worry about food and eating, they don't need as much as you think they do and they eat like birds at ages 2 through to about 4 or 5.  Portion size he's eating very little even when he does eat.  Like what looks to be a couple of bites and then we get 'I'm full now, can I go?'

[anna*]

What does his Dr say about his growth?

[Hedgehog17]

Thanks ladies 

I really can't help worrying 

We avoid the local HVs as they are useless, and there's only 1 good GP at our practice who I can't get to see - the system doesn't allow me to book ahead as every time I try they always say there's no appointments available  Instead I have to keep trying to get through between 8 and 8.30am for an appointment on the day with whoever is prepared to see us 

As there is no continuity there is no point in taking him to see a different person each time 

At least DS is peeing, pooping, sleeping well, has energy and is bright and happy, so I guess he's getting enough nutrition to be ok, if not to grow 

[clairebear79]

We avoid the local HVs as they are useless

Might be worth checking out if the hv's r still the same people if you havent been for a while. Like you, i'd avoided mine as hadnt found them to be too helpful when o was little, but i bit the bullet & went the other week & was pleasantly surprised 2 find a new hv who was incredibly helpful & had experience of dealing with 'fussy eaters'. She is coming out 2 our house 2 talk properly about it in the new year. All i am saying is the may be more helpful than u expect.x

[clairebear79]

Ps that thread i mentioned is 'ds & eating' on the preschoolers & kindergarteners board, sorry cant do link on my phone. Mashi has some really helpful advice.x

[Hedgehog17]

Might be worth checking out if the hv's r still the same people if you havent been for a while. Like you, i'd avoided mine as hadnt found them to be too helpful when o was little, but i bit the bullet & went the other week & was pleasantly surprised 2 find a new hv who was incredibly helpful & had experience of dealing with 'fussy eaters'.

That's awesome Claire  I'm waiting for the chief HV to retire - she's the worst and the rest all defer to her constantly  She was responsible for stressing me out totally about DS when he was a tiny baby with her unhelpful comments and nasty remarks, to the point I was crying every time after seeing her 

[anna*]

At the risk of going wildly off topic, I was also going to suggest shopping around for a new GP. We used to go to a surgery exactly like you describe, last year I moved us to a different Drs office, it is much smaller, there are only four GPs, the booking system means you can specify first available appointment or first available with a particular Dr - the receptionists are nice, and friendly: it's just a totally different experience than the last GPs office we went to.

Anyway, ((hugs))

[Hedgehog17]

Thanks Anna 

They are changing the rules in our PCT so hopefully I'll have that option soon  Currently you have to register with whichever surgery you are in the catchment for, but after the change we will be free to register at any surgery 

[anna*]

We have the catchment thing too, but they overlap somewhat. Roll on the new regime, the old way used to make me so crazy.