Weaning thread part 3... Come share experiences and offer support

[*Ali*]

If you've just gone back to work and hence she is suddenly without you all day I would probably be tempted to delay weaning until she adjusts to the new set up and feels more secure again. I probably would limit the constant BFing before dinner though. Maybe just feed once when you get home and then tell her she can have more at BT then distract her.

Is it just the two of you home then or can your DH distract her perhaps? When you're ready it might help if DH could get her up in the mornings and give her breakfast so she doesn't ask for the morning feed.

Does she drink cows milk from a cup at all?

[Violet's mom]

I've tried different kinds of milk and she really doesn't like any.  I'm debating between adding a touch of chocolate or mixing with bm - which is limited since I am going to stop pumping at work soon.

It's just me for about 2 hrs until DH comes home.  It'll be easy to wean the morning feed since I leave for work so early but that's when I am usually the fullest and most uncomfortable so I'm not sure when I will do that one.  I'll try distracting her but now she's come down with a terrible cold so I will probably delay a little while since she isn't eating and is only bf'ing.

[Baby_A_Mama]

Hi Moms, looking for any support/advice!

My DD is 9.5months. I am likely returning to work part time when she turns 11months so I am looking to wean her off daytime breastfeeds (2) onto a bottle of formula for each feed.  She has an unconfirmed milk protein allergy so I cannot go to cows milk yet.  She used to take a bottle like a champion whenever we needed or felt like letting daddy or visitors have a go with feeding, up until 2 months ago it was always expressed milk but as my stored up supply ran out we started introducing formula. It's hypoallergenic so it took quite a few days of mixing the two but we got to a point that she would take it happily. 4 days ago I gave her a bottle of formula after her pm nap, no problems. I decided then, that I would start doing this daily to start eliminating that breastfeed and once my boobs adjusted I would do feed after the a.m. nap, thinking we have a big luxury of time at this point.  The next day, she outright refused the bottle and has ever since. Over the weekend I tried getting dad to give her the bottle while I was out in the garden, not a chance!!  It was like she heard my thoughts and is revolting against me! She remains super cranky and crying lots until she gets the breast.

Does anyone have any ideas as to what could be going on? How to go back to good bottle taking?  I have tried sippy cups to because she drinks out of that during the day.  She loves Almond milk so I have tried blending the formula with that in her sippy cup. She will take a tiny bit but not very interested.  I would like to tackle this now so I have plenty of time to get both my boobs and her adjusted to the bottle before going back to work.  I am looking to continue with the morning wake up and before bedtime breastfeeds for awhile as I'm not 100% ready to give it up. She is showing signs of weaning herself off the bedtime one anyways, sometimes she doesn't really take any, but the morning we both seem to really enjoy.

[Fiver]

I think that if it was me I'd be persisting with the cup, whether that's a sippy cup, a straw cup or an open cup.

[4isstillnighttime]

Hi everyone, I wonder if anyone can help. I am BFing my twin girls, they have always been total bottle refusers. I am new to BW so they feed in quite a non-EASY way - before their first nap, after their first nap, after their second nap and before bed. And loads overnight, but that's another story.

I'm going back to work in 6 weeks but only 3 days a week. They won't take a bottle, or formula from a cup although they drink water from it really well. To be honest, the BF are mostly my idea when they are a bit grumpy or if I want them to stay awake longer, if I wasn't there I think they could easily be distracted with water and a banana or something. Or they will drink cows milk. Is it feasible to just carry on as we are when I'm there but get nursery to give cows milk on the other days? I've tried all formulas and they hate them all the same! I can't express milk - just can't, don't know why. But I love our feeding and wanted to carry on for a bit longer. Or should I start cutting out the daytime feeds now so it's not a shock - maybe they are more interested than I think!

Hope that makes sense!! And thanks in advance. My health visitor was profoundly unhelpful, she seems to think BFing twins is a bit unnatural to start with!!

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

Unnatural? Wth? Lol and here I thought bf was the most natural thing.

How old are your lo's? Here cow's milk as a drink is not recommended until over one year, but if that is then case and they like it I would just go with that on daycare days and carry on bf when you are home if that suits you all best. I can't pump either but thankfully DD3 likes formula so we are ever so slowly weaning over to that.

[4isstillnighttime]

Brilliant, thanks. I'm in the uk but my hv is....old fashioned is maybe the kindest way to put it. I have found bf brilliant (although it was tough as nails for the first few months) as bottle feeding twins makes a lot of washing up and I am lazy!

The girls are 8.5 months, will be 10 months when I go back. Perhaps I should persevere with the formula....I think maybe if I tried giving it at a non feed time just as a drink they might be less annoyed by it? Also I gave the cows milk cold, would it be better to give the formula cold as well?

In my heart I think I'm worried they'll wean themselves...I'm not ready yet....

[Violet's mom]

When I went back to work recently my dd did well with a bf before work, when I got home, and at bedtime and my milk supply accommodated the new schedule.  Agree with pp to just fill them up with food and a little cows milk (as long as they tolerate it well) to tide them over until they can bf. 

Enjoy your last few weeks with them!!!  It'll work out!

[*Ali*]

Cows milk isn't recommended as a drink in the uk until after 1yo either.  It doesn't have the nutrients they need like breast milk or formula do. I would persevere with offering formula in a cup,  cold if they seem to like that.  Maybe offer it instead of water at meal times.

If you do need to use cows milk at all then I would discuss it with your GP first. By The time they are 10 months old s/he might feel that 3 BFs is enough and they can do without any milk during your 3 working days.

I'd actually consider complaining about your HV for making you feel that way.  Sounds like she needs more training.

[4isstillnighttime]

I tried in a cup at mealtimes, and from the looks on their faces you'd have thought I'd put lemon juice in the cups! Then there was a meltdown. Might try giving an afternoon snack of biscuit and some formula, then, and see if that works. I'm assuming the formulas are all the same? The only one I think we haven't tried is HIPP.....

The hv in fairness hadn't said anything overt, just been quite keen on formula at any opportunity. I've heard the same from other BFing twin mums - there's a lot of scepticism that it's possible, even by midwives etc!

[Regina Phalange]

Hey Weaning Moms! (Weaners?? Lol, sorry.)

Just thought I'd chime in here. We are coming up to my son's first birthday, and it looks like we are in the process of weaning. I've had supply issues in the past, due to the fact that Zach very rarely asks to nurse, so we just fell into a routine of normally nursing whenever he woke and at bedtime. I guess because he usually only nursed around the same times every day, my supply took a hit much sooner than I wanted to wean. So I started nursing more frequently to get it back up and ended up taking Domperidone as well because he started biting any time it wasn't coming fast enough. Anyway, long story short, we eventually settled back into a bit of a routine where I nursed in the morning, before each nap, and at bedtime. I started to notice a slight decrease again, and last week I finished the Domperidone. I've noticed a huge decrease in supply since then. But since we're so close to a year, I decided to not fight it this time, and take advantage of the decreasing supply and see where this leads us. Yesterday and today I've introduced a little cow's milk, and he seems to like it so far. I've also added a solid snack before nursing for his PM nap, and I'm making sure there's always a sippy of water available so that he's getting enough liquids. So far things are going smoothly, and he doesn't seem to be bothered at all. Hopefully it continues this way.

I have mixed feelings about weaning, which I'm sure is quite common. I am looking forward to the added freedom, as well as having my body back. But I will miss our quiet moments and the closeness we shared. But, new experiences bring new things to love, so I'm excited for what the future will bring!

I don't have any questions or concerns for you lovely ladies at this point, but just wanted to come here and commiserate with others trying to figure out this whole weaning thing.

[*Ali*]

Hugs Regina. Yes it is a bitter sweet moment for sure. Huge congrats on making it to a year in the face of such adversity.

[Violet's mom]

Is it time for us?

I am back on leave from work and home with Vi again.  Since being back (for 2 weeks) she has been begging and whining to breast feed I feel like every hour!  When I was working for the 3 months she could eat really well at daycare and drink coconut/almond milk.  Now she barely eats.

She is making me crazy!  Even when I know she has gotten all the milk she will still sit there with my nipple in her mouth.  This morning she sucked for an hour!  I don't know what the fine line between setting rules and being sensitive to her needs are now.  She is 15 months old atm.  I always offer her water/milk in a cup/ food before giving her breast.  She will sometimes eat or drink but then usually throws it on the ground or puts the food down my shirt.  I really didn't want to stop yet but I just have no control over it and it's really getting to me - so any suggestions are welcome!

[*Ali*]

I would probably tell her that boobies are for certain times like wu, nap time and bt. Outside of those hours if she is hungry or thirsty she can ask for food or drink.  If she wants comfort she can ask for a cuddle.  Then if she asks for a BF between those times I would say "Yes,  when it's sleepy time (or whenever you decide to set BFs). it's not boobie time now. Would you like a banana or a hug? "

Sounds like she had been missing you and is making the most of having you around all the time again.

[Violet's mom]

Thanks Ali.  You don't think she "needs" it then?  Strictly comfort?  She will cry a lot - how do you deal with that?

Thanks again...