4mo NW - Please Help, I'm Losing It

[theu.s.lees]

MY 4mo DD has been a bit of a struggle from the beginning. She has reflux (diagnosed at 3 weeks), but does well as long as she is on the proper meds for her weight. Technically she has STTN since 2 months or so, with one NW around 4:30-5 and then would get up around 7 to start the day. We've done a relaxed EASY for those early months as was suggested by many.

Recently, however, everything has gone to pot! A couple weeks ago she started having multiple (5-6 NW) a night, up every 2 hours or less. I took her in and had her meds adjusted, which helped for a few days. For the past week she has done 3-4 NW (11, 3, 6) and up around 7/8 and I'm going crazy. I feel like I've been sleep deprived for so long. Maybe if she had never STTN it would be different, but I know that she can. I just don't know what to do. I do nurse her at each waking and she takes a moderate amount. Today I'm going to try tanking her up during the day even more, but not sure how to do that and do an EASY if she can be up for 1.5 hours or so at a time.

Oh and we were/are having nap problems too, in that she won't stay down in her crib anymore but will sleep for hours in your arms. I had started with HTTJ, but I think I ended up taking away her ability to self soothe/mantra cry to get back down. She wasn't good at it before, but she could do it sometimes. Now she can't resettle at all, even with help it seems. DH or I end up taking her out of her room so that she doesn't escalate so much and wake up her brother, napping in the next room. Saturday she got so worked up that she was gasping for breath (even while napping) for an hour afterwards, and that was with us trying everything to help her.

Please help, I'm just losing it. I feel badly because I'm so tired I feel that I can hardly function for my 21 mo son.

[theu.s.lees]

Oh, I was supposed to answer a few of these, sorry, I got carried away. Here it goes

How old is your child?
4 Months

What’s his/her daily routine?
We stick with EAS - 1.5-2 hrs A time (recently increased to help with naps and that seemed to work, but now I think 2 hours is too long)

What’s nap routine?
Change diaper, sleep sack, read story, pat bum until mostly asleep, lay in elevated crib on her side , pat more if seeming to need it

How long are naps?
Usually 2-3 45 minute naps, with a 3 hr nap mid-day. I've been trying to help resettle the morning nap and have been getting a 1.5 hr nap, a 2 hour nap, and a 30-45 min CN, but they only will extend now if there is holding involved.

What's bedtime routine? Time?
Same as nap, around 6:30-7

Do you bottle or breastfed??
Breastfeed.

How much? or how long?
Not sure how much, but she's pretty quick maybe 10 min on each side

If breastfed.. one side or both?? (at each feed)
both usually

How many wakes per night?
3-4

What’s your LO like when waking at night? How long is he/she up?
She's up for 10-15 min usually, she's sleepy

When you go to him/her is she fussing or crying? Or is it a mantra cry?
She's fussing/crying. I don't wait too long bc I don't want her to wake up DS, but she isn't settling down.

What have you tried to settle??
I have and usually end up getting back up 30min later.

What do you do for A time and how long is it?
She plays in her chair, sits in our lap and plays with DS, does some floor time, but not a ton due to her reflux. It is about 1.5-2 hrs

Are there developmental issues such as teething or milestones?
I don't think so. Though I have heard of the 4m gs.

Have you introduced cereal? Why, how much, and how many times a day? (for LO’s under 6 months)
No.
Do they have a prop? If so what is it?
Paci.
Do they have a lovie?
No, but thought about introducing one now that she isn't swaddled. Which she fought the swaddle and was up 5-7 times a night while swaddled.

[cbmplank]

I was so happy to read this post! I am having the exact same issues...so I guess I am not happy for you to be going through this (lol) but was glad to see I was not alone! I am hoping that we can get some great advice on here because I have been a walking zombie for the past few weeks and cannot keep this up for much longer!

My daughter is 4 1/2 months old and has been waking up every 1 1/2 to 2 hours during the night. I am BF and will feed her when she wakes up. She will usually fall asleep while nursing and I can lay her back in her pack-n-play, which is right next to my side of the bed. Lately she has been waking up within 30min to an hour and I have to cuddle her back to sleep. Then when I lay her back down she may sleep for an hour or two if I am lucky. Usually by 2am or 3am I can't take it anymore and I let her sleep with me just so I can get some sleep before I have to get up at 5am for work.

She has silent reflux so I have her mattress elevated and I swaddle her arms so she is snug. She will take a pacifier if she is really sleepy but spits that out after a few minutes of being asleep.

I do not want to let her cry it out, because to me she is still too little. We have tried to give her rice and oatmeal, but lately she has been spitting that out and rejecting the spoon. She will even gag on the first bite and then not take it. So that is not working either.

Overall she is super happy and talks, rolls over, plays and smiles when she is awake. Just need some help with the sleeping for my sake and my husband's sake!!!

Thank you for any help!!!!

[momma.bear]

I wish I was replying with a solution, but we're in the same boat as well. For the past two weeks (I think... I lost count and everything is a blur) we've been having tons of NWings, some nights it is every hour, other it's every two, but I haven't slept more than 2-3 hours straight in a long time.
How many night feedings does your LO have?
And what are naps like?
I have a 40 minute napper, but even on the days where I've extended naps through shh/pat etc. he's still had brutal nights.
I have heard of 4 month sleep regression.
Would love to hear some success stories!

[jennandsophie]

Big hugs ladies.  I have been there.  Almost went nuts when DS was 4 months old.  It was the 4 month sleep regression for us, as he was a much better sleeper until then.  Suddenly we were getting NWings every hour or two through the night and nap refusals.

I wish I could say I had a magic solution.  It lasted about 2-3 weeks for us until one night I just pat and shushed him for what seemed like an hour until he fell back asleep for a 6 hour stretch.  It felt like a miracle.  No kidding - it all changed after that one night.  He went back to his regular sleeping patterns after that.  It was really weird.

Hang in there.  As long as you know your LOs are still having good day sleep so she's not OT, trying to help them self-settle so that you don't become a prop and she is not waking out of hunger/discomfort, there's not too much more you can do.  This will eventually resolve itself.  Seems like forever when you're in the middle of it, but it does get better, I promise. 

[theu.s.lees]

Glad to hear I'm not alone (kind of) or that I'm not just a massive failure!

m.bear - We are having 2-4 night feedings, it is basically every 2-3 hours, with one 4 hour stretch in the early part of the night. SHe usually naps well, but the past few days have been brutal trying to get her to stay down (in other words, someone ends up holding her because she gets to be in such an OT panic). Good nap days usually mean good nights, though like you, they are not right now. Just interesting all around.

cbmplank - reflux is a nightmare, isn't it?!Do you have her on meds? We have reflux (not silent, though sometimes I think there is a bit of the silent). I know that are nights are really rough when her meds are out of whack.

[tweetie]

Hi theu I am sorry I do not have any solution just wanted to give you support and send you a hug. You are dealing with sleep regression and that one is tricky  .  My lady started with NW when she was 4 mo old and still she has one  long one  . By that age she would sleep 6 or 7 hours without waking and after that I need to admit it never happened (now she is close to 8 mo). Naps also went down hill and were 30 minutes or maximum 45 ... The only thing I could say that it will pass and more experienced ladies here will help you with EASY and great advices.