Support for dropping the nap part 9.

[*Kara*]

Sounds like it's time to drop the nap, ftm.  If she fights it, I would just not offer... try a quiet time with some books around 2pm for an hour (I have even been known to allow DD to watch TV - something quiet like Waybuloo just to get her to relax).  That said, try to keep her day to a max of 11.5 -12 hrs.  If she is up at 6am, I would aim to have her in bed by 6pm...

she just turned 2 feb 27. her bedtime is 600 but she is impossible to put to sleep even without the nap (million excuses and asks for everything under the sun) and doesnt end up falling asleep until 6:30ish

I would try for a 630pm bedtime... do you have a nice wind down to help her relax before bedtime?  I found this to be key when we first dropped the nap... my DD would get super wound up and be hard to settle...

[clairebear79]

AN - sorry for late reply how r things going? Yes iiwy i'd prob allow the CU nap & see if combined with an earlier bt.

As for us, 8am starts are a thing of the past!!! O is barely napping at home anymore, & his nights have gone from 13-15hrs to an  average 11.5-12. I'm not sure if its a drop in sleep needs as he reaches 3 or if its just OT (he has developed a flapping arm thing so probably is). Maybe a combo of both.

Anyway Bedtime is now 6.30 & he's waking 6-6.30. He always slept longer overnight if i kept his nnd short, like 10-10.5hrs (hence why we have the early bedtime) but there is no way i can do it with these early starts. I can't possibly get him down any earlier.  So what to do?

If i try for a nap he screams & cries, & if he takes one he's up til 8.30pm & up early the next day. Do i just need to accept the long nights are gone & push bt back to 7pm in order to get a later WU? Any thoughts much appreciated.xx

[barbaraz78]

Claire, I was wondering the same. Since DS turned 3 his sleep needs completely dropped to 11.5-12 h in 24 h and we are now (at 3.5) at 11-11.5 h of sleep in 24h. There is no combination that can give us more. When he naps (at daycare, it is impossible at home now) his nights go down to 10 h (9.30 pm -7.30 am), if I can put him down for a nap and let him nap for 30 mins, the night is 10.30-11 h, when he doesn't nap we have 11-11.5 h (8.30-7.30/8). I tried different day lengths (from 11 h to 13 h, even if 11 h is really hard for me, as DH and I come from work at 6-7 and we have dinner all together...), different nap lengths, etc, but the result is the same. If the day is shorter than 12-12.5 on a nnd, we have a shorter night generally....
The behavior is generally fine, so I am starting to think this is enough. However, I have put a thread on that: 11-11.5 h sleep per day at 3.5 yo. Is it enough?

Another thing: when he firstly dropped his sleep needs at 3, he also had concomitantly a BIG developmental leap, that rendered his behavior impossible and lasted for 2-3 months. I was initially worried thinking it was OTness, but then I realized it was independent from the amount of sleep he got, and I understood it was mainly developmental. Now I can see he had really an amazing growth in conscience and reasoning ability, so I am sure it was that.

[destina23]

Looking for nap dropping advice. My guy will be 4 next month and I've been trying to drop the nap for 2 weeks, but have been all over the place!  I keep getting early 5-5:30 wakings.  (

Basic summary.  His nights were getting too short going from 11 hours nights (8-7) to 10 hour nights (8-6) to even less (8:30/8:45-6).  He was just not tired enough for bed.  My first thought was to shorten that nap.  I cut it from ending at 3, to ending at 2:30.  This was an hour nap 1:30-2:30 and still caused too late of a bedtime.  I then tried to make the nap shorter having a 2-2:30 nap.  I think that cause some major OT in him though.  So then I just decided to cut nap out. 

He was waking around 6 and I put him to bed at 630 and was then getting only 11 hour nights with him waking at 530.

I tested trying putting him to bed a little later at 645 and that caused an even shorter night waking at 5:20.

One morning he woke even earlier at 5 AM he was so OT so I napped him at 10:30 AM and he woke at 11:30.  I put him down for bed that day at 6:45 but he did not fall asleep till 7:15.

I also tried last night putting him to bed at 6:15.  He woke at 2AM and fell asleep about an hour later and woke for the day at 6:15.  Not sure what that means?

I'm at a loss at what direction to take?

From what I can gather, if he wakes super early at 5-5:45 he needs some sort of early nap.  After a nap he needs about 7-8 hours before bedtime.  On no nap days or days starting at 6/7 I have no idea when he needs to go to bed?

Hope that makes sense!  )

[first_time_mommy]

I am so glad I asked for advice.  We are going to try for a 2pm "quiet time" today.  We have a very consistent wind down routine, which hasn't changed since she went into her big girl bed a year ago.  We go potty, read books in her room, say prayers, I sing a lullaby, and end with hugs and kisses.  I guess I really was not ready for the drop of the nap with the new baby!  Selfish, yes, but I really hoped this wouldn't happen!  We have been trying for 7pm bedtime the last two nights and she has been up around 6am both days.  She is a 7am riser typically, so this isn't ideal, but maybe it will straighten out with the change to 2pm for quiet time.

[first_time_mommy]

Destina,
We had the same problem in our schedule for a short period of time.  We always did a 12:45 nap and then a 6:30 bedtime.  Obviously, since I am here too, Idk if your guy needs the nap, but 5:30am days are always no fun.  Your nap seems a little late in the day.  Maybe try an earlier nap and bedtime with a long wind down prior? another trick we use is to eat dinner early on those days.  It really helps our kids think that it is later than it really is, and therefore, time for bed!

[AN190781]

Hi,

The last few days we seem to be having naps every other day!  At nursery yesterday he refused to nap, it reached 4.20pm and he fell asleep on somebody.  They let him sleep for 20mins, which must have been a power nap as it got us through to bt at 7.15pm, but he had a good night with no NW's, then woke at 6.00am this morning.  But he was tired today and slept for an hour and a half.  Strangely the napping every other day seems to be working as we don't seem to be getting in the OT/UT loop so I might try and stick to this for a while. But I definitely think we are on our way to nap dropping.

Claire I feel your pain, the early mornings are hard work, especially when it means you have to get them to bed so early at night.  I'm just accepting it's another period of change and hopefully soon we can get another routine established.  Good luck x

[destina23]

Hi

first_time_mommy thanks!  The dinner early idea helped.  we were doing later naps because he was waking at 7.  With nap dropping that's certainly changed!

We managed a 6:15 bedtime.  So hard to do early with the hubby coming home at 7 and also putting my 6 month old to bed. Hoping it helps!

I think if I get an earlier than 6 wakeup a nap will be needed.  So hard!

[first_time_mommy]

Hopefully you got a good night of sleep? You're right, it is so hard!  It looks like we are back to the 6:30 too and I was just thinking how I really have to get in gear to have dinner ready right when hubby gets home... I remember when we had a 6:30 bedtime every night.  Whenever we went anywhere, whoever we were with thought hubby and I were crazy! 

We had a very nice "quiet time" yesterday.  Unfortunately, we had swim lessons until 5:30 and did our best but ended up with a 7:15 bedtime.  Wow, it was BAD.  Huge tantrums starting at dinner at 6:10.  The lil lady finally fell asleep but had 2 NWs and up again at 6:15ish today.  Aiming for that 6:30 bedtime tonight...

[destina23]

I think I'm in trouble tonight.  Was helping my 6 month old go back to sleep and my other guy fell asleep in his room at 2:40!  Ugh. dreading bedtime tonight.

[destina23]

Any thoughts as to why my guy keeps doing early 520 am wakings? I do a 6:15 bedtime. earliest I can do.  Guess ill have to nap today.

[Bex09]

Hi all, ugh we have got in a right mess with this nap dropping. I can't believe DD hasn't dropped it yet as we have been tweaking and capping for about 6 months if not longer! So we have been having no nap days a good few times a week and catch up naps in between which has been working great. But not anymore, no nap days are fine WU anytime from 7-8am and BT between 6-7pm so we get an 11 hr day and then generally a 12 or 13 hr night. BUT DD can't handle more than two no nap days in a row without getting OT, foul mood and temper and tons of NW. If she does nap even for 30 or 40 mins we are now getting ridiculous short nights and EW, it was 5.40am this morning!! Then when she EW she can't handle a no nap day as she is so tired. Any ideas? I am at a loss as to what to try now .

[barbaraz78]

Destina, I think at 4 average sleep in 24 h is 11-11.5 h. That's probably why you have a 5.20 start with a 6.15 bt?

[barbaraz78]

Bex, we are in similar boat...
How is her behavior after a short night (how short?) followed a nap? You can consider to do a later bt on nap days, so to have later wu and a nnd?

[Bex09]

Hi Barbara, her mood after a nap is awful too, she often refuses to wake up and is so grumpy with tiredness it is better to not have it TBH. If she has a nap then BT has to be late, usually 8.30pm or even 9pm! But then she wakes anytime from 5.30-6.30 in the morning!! The earliest ever was 5am after a BT refusal until 9pm!! So you see we really do need the nap to just go but then DD gets so OT and grumpy and with these EW I am getting into a trap of a nap each day as she is so tired.

So for e.g. DD didn't nap Mon or Tues and did at least 12hr nights right through. She was shattered on Wed after nursery so slept for 1 hr from 1.15 to 2.15, cried when I woke her and didn't want to get up at all. Then went to sleep about 8.30 last night but woke at 5.40 this am and is shattered again today. She actually asked to go for a sleep at 11.30am!!!