10 Month old - Crawling, OT, UT, Night Waking HELP!!

[mananieto]

Hello!! My LO is giving me trouble and I need Help!!

I have many questions regarding sleep (Night and Day).

First until recently LO took 2 1 hour naps with a 3.5 A. As soon as he turned 10 months he refuses his morning nap!!! He is taking only one nap of 1.30-2 and then its too late into the afternoon to take another nap.

The problem is he seems tired at about 3.5A but as soon as I lower him in the crib he smiles and immediately starts playing, crawling and standing up. He is almost impossible to wind-down at this point. It takes about 45 min to get him to sleep. He laughs and plays all the time. Only when I bring him closer to sleep does he cry a little. He now has a 4.5-5A (which leaves no room for an afternoon nap).

My question is: Is this developmental? The crawling in bed? Should I let him be until he tires himself (the thing is I know he is tired). If he keeps standing up do I just leave? When I leave he doesn´t cry he just keeps on playing. Is he OT? I´m confused because there is no crying.

Is one nap ok a this age? I feel like he should be getting more sleep. But then if I try and earlier nap time he just wont go down.

At bed time we have a great routine but we have always suffered from NW. 9 months SA hit us hard and things had recently gotten better. Until now. He goes to sleep perfectly, but he has begun waking to crawl and stand up!! No laughing or playing. Its almost as if he was sleep-crawling. Thing is, after he wakes up from crawling he cant get back to sleep easily. Is this developmental? Will this pass? Should I go in and help him back to sleep?

This is our EASY if it help!!!

8 W
12.30 S
2 W
6.30 - 7 S

Without taking into account the NW he is sleeping 13 hours which I guess makes up for the lack of naps??

Thank you so much!!!

[jessmum46]

Sleep disturbances can be very much related to developmental changes, but 10 months is also a common time for things to go wonky.  Have you read this? 10/ 11mo sleep gone wonky? Read this first!

Ten months is very early (but not completely unheard of) to be on one nap.  Really you want the nap to be a good 2h or more to be sustainable at this age otherwise OT can hit very hard very quickly.  Early bedtimes are key which it looks like you're doing with only a 10.5-11h day

When in the night do your night wakings happen?

[mananieto]

Hi!! thanks for your reply!!

His NW are all over the place. I have tried everything and I cant seem to find a pattern. Some days he sleeps perfectly during the day with a great BT and still he wakes up all night. Some other nights he had no sleep during the day and we end up only with a few NW. So I just cant put my finger on it. He used to be a great sleeper. Falling asleep on his own and only waking for his Paci (which took about 10 seconds for him to go back to sleep). But the 9 month SA hit us hard (he hasnt slept more than 3 hours in 2 whole months!!! And just when his SA had gotten better and I had finally gotten him back on track, he starts crawling and waking in his sleep!!!

I hope this doesnt last long!!! Im loosing my mind. I am doing my best to continue to teach him to fall asleep on his own. Its very tempting at the moment to just rock him to sleep and put him down. But I know Ill create a bad habit in the long run. Ill just keep at it. I just hope this crawling ends soon.

At the moment I just PD as many time as necesary until he eventually stops trying to stand up and falls asleep.

Ill keep you updated!! Thanks!!

[jessmum46]

Hmm if he is waking that frequently it sounds like he may have some prop issues......does he replug the paci himself without any help from you?  Does he go to sleep independently at BT?  Can you talk me through what you do at night wakings?  Do you hold back from going to him until its an 'I need you' cry?

[mananieto]

Hi!! First of all thanks for your response!!! I can not thank you enough for helpins us all with our LOs sleep issues...

LO falls asleep on his own for BT and Nap time. Before this whole crawling thing started I would just place him in his crib and walk out. He just lay still and eventually closed his eyes. At the moment, if he crawls I lay him back down as many times as I have to, until eventually he gets it and stays still and closes his eyes. So still falling asleep on his own. Tomorrow Im getting some bumpers (breatheable) so should I levae him there to crawl until he tires on his own? Or until he cries? And then intervene?

Your question about my involvement in NW got me thinking. I think Ive messed up that part the whole time. I never wait until he CRIES, I go in and help him as soon as he cries but I dont wait until he really needs me. The reason I dont is because when he CRIES he is almost impossible to settle down. He can cry up to an hour until I bring him out of the room or I turn the lights on. I have a question about this: Wont him crying for so long have the same effect on his brain and his development as if I let him CIO?? Should I wait until he CRIES? If he crawls at night do I let him until he tires himself or CRIES?

When I come in for his NW I usually put his Paci back in (he doesnt do it himself, I guess because I only let him have one right before he goes to sleep and take it out when he wakes) and lay him on his side. This usually does the trick and in 20 seconds Im back to bed. He has some NW where when I place the Paci he falls asleeps but then wakes up 5 minutes later, this can go on for an hour. I usually stay in his room when this happens and shushh and place pacifier as needed. Otherwise I end up getting up every 5 minutes and having to walk to his room (I have no idea why this NW are different from the others, or why he wakes after he falls asleep. He falls asleep and then starts to stir, his head moves back and foward until he wakes himself). Should I wait again until he CRIES?

Thabk you so much!! Sorry for the long post.

[jessmum46]

Generally I would advise not to intervene until he actually needs you as if you offer help when LO doesn't need it, that's when you risk becoming a prop.  If he's crawling around but quiet or happy or just fussing just leave him to it - my LO often spends a few minutes chatting to and rearranging her teddies before going off to sleep.  Is he pulling to stand yet?  If not then once he is crying for you properly, you go in, pick up briefly to reassure and then lay him down, repeat as needed until he settles.  If he is pulling to stand you only do the put down part - no picking up.  At ten months he should be developmentally capable of replugging the paci himself so i would scatter several in his cot and work hard on teaching him to do it himself during the daytime.  So guide his hand to it, and then guide his hand to his mouth to show him how, but don't do the work for him.

There is a big difference between waiting until he really needs you to intervene, and CIO.  CIO refers to essentially ignoring a baby's 'I need you' cries and leaving them alone to figure it out themselves.  We don't support that in any way for the reasons you describe.  Yes there will definitely be crying if you wait until LO really needs you, but the difference is that the crying is not fear of abandonment, it is frustration that they can't sleep or are having to learn to sleep in a different way.  The key is that you are right there helping them through it.  Does that make sense?

All that said, if you feel that extra reassurance or cuddles are needed at times (e.g. Those every 5 minute wakings you describe - here that is normally down to discomfort) then that is totally fine to give

[mananieto]

Hi thanks for your reply!! I will try to teach him to place the pacifier back in. Im going to the Dr tomorrow and I eill ask him about discomfort. Today he has woken up 5 times already and he has only been asleep for an hour. Its like he cant get to deep sleep. I feel sorry for him, and I feel like Im loosing my mind. I dont undertand why if hes and independent sleeper at BT he wakes so much and stirs and fidgets so much!!!

The CIO vs him crying wiith me makes sense. Thanks for that!!

[jessmum46]

No problem . Could it be teeth bothering him? Or ears?