Author Topic: When will DS be ready for preschool?  (Read 702 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Crabsmile

  • New, But Posting Steadily!
  • **
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 74
  • Location: Shanghai, China
When will DS be ready for preschool?
« on: March 10, 2013, 13:47:29 pm »
Hi there,

For some reason,I have to send my DS to preschool.

He is 25mo. He's shy and clingy. He follows me even I just want a drink in the kitchen! He never plays with himself for over 15mins...

The most important is he has little interest in other people and toys. His favorite entertainment is to play hide and seek with us, or play "acting taking a bus game" with us. He doesn't like crayons, cars, balls or blocks which seem to attract huge amt of kids.

Last week I took him to the trial of one preschool. He didn't communicate with any teacher or kid,he even didn't look at them. Although he was sometimes noisy cause he wanted to get out. But I tried my best to keep him there. But his all attention was on me. He looked nervous when the kids having assemble dance. He pay no attention to the teacher reading story or the kids playing trains or they drawing. He just requested me to play "acting taking a bus game" whatever other kids are playing. It just seemed strange to the other kids and sometimes make me awkward.

But what I care most is for a kid like my DS, will putting him to preschool cause any kind of mental trouble that have bad effects? The headmaster told me it was just because my DS used to have less contact with other people,which his preschool can just offer. And he said my DS will sure cry a lot at the first period,but it will be ok.

But is it really ok to put him there,cause I think it will take really long time before DS can fully establish communication with people there.

Offline Diana1981

  • Mama de Yeyo y Yoyo
  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 74
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 3505
  • My angels
  • Location: Guayaquil, Ecuador
Re: When will DS be ready for preschool?
« Reply #1 on: March 10, 2013, 14:11:46 pm »
Hi there
My ds was 23 months when started preschool. At the beginning he cried a little but it ended within 2 weeks. It is a gradual thing, and I think when your DS can see the other kids have fun and play with toys he will slowly integrate with them.

Have you taken your DS to a educational psychologist? Maybe he could be tested before going to a preschool? Just to know if there is anything you should be aware of.

Hugs




As you become more clear about who you really are, you'll be better able to decide what is best for you - the first time around

Offline Crabsmile

  • New, But Posting Steadily!
  • **
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 74
  • Location: Shanghai, China
Re: When will DS be ready for preschool?
« Reply #2 on: March 11, 2013, 13:55:45 pm »
Hi Diana,
If we don't have any consultant for preschoolers, is there any sign that the kids are ready to get into the new environment?
I'm very worried that DS has such strong SA and difficulty to establish new relationship and contact with new people. I'm worried it will not be good for DS's character developing if he is not psychologically matured.

Offline pinkladyangel

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 9
  • Posts: 520
  • Location: Lincolnshire UK
Re: When will DS be ready for preschool?
« Reply #3 on: March 11, 2013, 14:43:24 pm »
Hi there.
I'm a pre-school assistant and where i work we take children from 27mths. we have a lot that have never been away from parents and for a start they do find it difficult. They do (however long it takes) settle in the end. Also parents can make things a little harder. I'm even guilty of it myself. When you drop your lo off and they're clingy the best thing to do is tell them that your going shopping and you'lbe back when you've finished. At this point you need to hand them to a member of staff and leave.


I have experienced this from both sides. My lo was very clingy and i was told the best thing was to drop her off and go. Well i felt so guilty and after 15 minutes i rang and was told she'd stopped crying as soon as i'd left and was now playing wirh the playdough. They even took pictures of her having fun. I now work at the same pre-school and see parents that were just like i was. It really is easier on the child to just leave.
Sorry for rambling and i hope it helps.

Offline Crabsmile

  • New, But Posting Steadily!
  • **
  • Showing Appreciation 0
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 74
  • Location: Shanghai, China
Re: When will DS be ready for preschool?
« Reply #4 on: March 12, 2013, 07:47:53 am »
Thank you all!
I will try my best to settle both him and myself...

Offline Katet

  • Resident BW Chatterbox!
  • *****
  • Showing Appreciation 608
  • Gender: Female
  • Posts: 14348
  • Sydney Australia
  • Location: Sydney
Re: When will DS be ready for preschool?
« Reply #5 on: March 12, 2013, 08:04:56 am »
As far as any research I have read here is no "developmental" reason that they should be in preschool before they are about 4yo... some children (mine included) really don't enjoy it or gain anything from it at 2/3yo... by 4+ my DS1 wanted to go extra days but before that he really struggled. There are lots of people who say "they need it" etc, but some of it comes from parents who need it or businesses that make money from it, but there is no concrete proof that children who don't go until older are worse off.

DS1 is now 9.5yo, was on the Student Representitive Council last year & has a good circle of friends & is (quote teacher last year) "one of my best all-rounders" & there is a boy the same age who was in preschool from a much younger age who is socially struggling, his Mum said he cried every day at preschool until his 3rd Birthday & then never really loved it... whether there is a connection or not I don't know, but I do know that my "Mummy instinct" said that as we didn't need him to go because I could work freelance, then I wasn't going to send him.

So my thought is if you aren't comfortable with him going & you don't need him to go, then hold off longer. The older he gets the more read able he will be to process the separation etc & the more comfortable he will be.  If y
dc1 July 03, dc2 May 05