Sleeping thru but naps are now !!!

[laurenchant3e]

My son is 13 months old and only started sleeping through the night last week (he woke up 2x per night before that) and I can tell we are getting off track again.  We had problems with sleep from the beginning of his life - he had trouble gaining weight as a newborn and as a result he was very needy and clingy, especially at sleep time.  He formed a lot of bad habits early on and we have had trouble breaking them.  I knew about Shh Pat, PUPD, etc. but nothing worked for him.  I truly believe we are the 1% of people for whom nothing would have worked at the time. 

Getting him to sleep has always been a challenge and, no matter how we tried, we weren't able to eliminate his sleep "props" for a long time.  He goes to sleep with a pacifier and I leave several in his crib at night.  We have progressed so that we can put him down in his crib fully awake and he will go to sleep by himself without crying, but only at bed time. 

At his first nap time, I still nurse him to put him down.  It's the only time I nurse him, now.  I have tried just giving him a bottle, giving him nothing, rocking him, letting him cry with me, letting him cry without me, picking him up when he is crying and then putting him down immediately when he is not and sitting by his crib.  Nursing does not work for the second nap.  He gets drowsy, bites me and then "wakes up" abruptly and wants to play. 

A month ago, he started waking up much earlier than usual.  I read one of Kim West's (Sleep Lady) newsletters that made me think he may have gone down to 1 nap per day too early (2 hour nap).  This is what I changed when he started sleeping through the night:
- Tried to institute two naps per day (total sleep of 2.5 - 3 hours during the day.  4-5 hours between naps)
- Moved his bedtime 30 minutes earlier

After two days, he started sleeping through the night.  He slept for 12.5 hours/night for 3 nights in a row, along with maintaining the two naps per day. 

Then, I couldn't get him down for the second nap.

It's been 5 days since he had 2 naps per day.  We are currently averaging 1.5 hours of sleep during the day.  He is so overtired by the end of the day that I often put him down at 5:30.  Now, he has started waking early again (back to 11 hours of sleep).  I know he needs the second nap, but I just can't figure out how to get him to take it.

Please help!!!

Right now, this is a rough version of our schedule - the times vary so much, depending on whether he sleeps for 11 hours or 12 hours, but this is a basic idea. 

~5:30/6 AM Wake Up (sometimes is 4:30 AM and he plays in his crib until 5/5:15)
EAT Breakfast
Activity time:  Play, watch mom do errands, etc.
Snack
Sleep:  Nap #1 ~ 9:45/10.  Wakes ~11 (1 hr 20 min - 1 hr 45 min). 
EAT Lunch
Activity time:  Play outside, playground
Snack
Sleep:  Starts showing signs of tiredness around 2.  I try to put him to sleep at 2, then at 3, then at 4.  It doesn't Work.
EAT Dinner
Bathtime
SLEEP:  In Bed for the night at 5:30/6. 

[Buttonbobs]

Hi there, it does sound like you might be in the middle of a 2-1 nap dropping situation with a bit of OT building up. Particularly when a LO is not textbook/angel type it is important to take the transition slowly, and not necessarily go cold turkey to one nap.

Lots of people in this situation do a short capped nap of 30/45 mins in the morning followed by a longer nap in the afternoon for a while. Or you might find a long morning nap followed by a short CN works better for you. These two nap days could be mixed in with occasional one nap days and over time he will move towards more one nap days.

You might find you get some good support on the thread for this:

Support Thread for 2-1 Nap Transition cont'd pt 5

Also, I know your LO is older, but this could still be useful information.

10/ 11mo sleep gone wonky? Read this first!

Have a read of these links and come back and post a bit more if you're not sure what to try.

[laurenchant3e]

Thanks! I did check out those posts.  There's just a lot of info in them and it's a little overwhelming to weed through.  I know that he needs a second catnap - my problem is making it happen.  I'm not sure if I need to wake him early from his morning nap?  He only sleeps for an hour and a half, so I am not sure what time to wake him at... 45 minutes, maybe?  He just fell asleep for about 30 minutes in the car doing afternoon errands and had a 1.5 hour nap this morning.  However, it's 4:30 and he's going through a meltdown (with daddy - hence the ability to post online!!) 

[Buttonbobs]

If you are going to work towards a short CN in the afternoon, the morning nap should be as long as he will sleep. However, you could wake from the morning nap at about 45 mins initially and see if he'll do a long afternoon nap.

I personally did a long morning nap as I could never be sure that DD would sleep at all in the afternoon. Then for a while the only way I could get her to sleep a CN in the afternoon was to drive her in the car. What time did your LO sleep in the car and what time was his nap?

I know it is difficult when things are hard every day but you do need to choose one thing and stick with it for a bit before trying something else if you can. You may have a couple of days where it is no easier before it gets better.

[laurenchant3e]

I personally did a long morning nap as I could never be sure that DD would sleep at all in the afternoon. Then for a while the only way I could get her to sleep a CN in the afternoon was to drive her in the car. What time did your LO sleep in the car and what time was his nap?

I know it is difficult when things are hard every day but you do need to choose one thing and stick with it for a bit before trying something else if you can. You may have a couple of days where it is no easier before it gets better.

That sounds exactly like our situation.  He will wake at 6:30 AM, Nap from 10-11:20 (on bad days only until 11), then start showing signs of fatigue again around 1:30/2.  I pray for the morning nap to be as long as possible.  If i take him in the car then he will fall asleep around 2:30 and sleep for 20-40 minutes.  Yesterday, I transferred him from his car to his crib and he slept for a full hour (2 1 hour naps).  I tried the same today and he wouldn't go back to sleep in his crib.  Thinking  I should just stick with letting him sleep in the car seat, although I hate to waste the gas (over $4 here in Cali)

[Buttonbobs]

It does sounds to me as if he's really asking for a longer time before his first nap. I would suggest you try pushing the nap out by fifteen minutes at first possibly so you don't put him down until 3hrs45 A for three days. If he's still short napping push out again and hold, repeat until you get a long nap. What do you think?