Hi, DS is almost 3 months old and we've been using shush pat pretty much since birth. For the last month or so, he can pretty much self settle himself to sleep for all his naps. I am really grateful for that and I know I shouldn't complain but I still can't help wondering why he cannot self settle during bedtime and how I could help him learn to fall asleep at bedtime.
Our nap routine is really just close the curtains, swaddle, put him in his cot, and say it's time for bed, and he would start sucking his hand and fall asleep 5-10 minutes later with almost no fussing/crying
Our bedtime routine is:
bath or wipe down -> breastfeed (both sides) -> swaddle -> put him in cot, close curtains, say 'night night'
Sometimes he fall asleep from his feed. I would then put him in his cost and leave the room. He would then wake up crying (at increasing volume) about 10 minutes later and I have to go in to shush pat him.
When he doesn't fall asleep after BF, I would shush pat him until he stop fussing, then leave the room (or hide in a corner) and see if he would fall aslee[ on his own. He almost never. He would fuss and start crying and then I have to go in and pat him for anywhere from 5 to 20 min before he falls asleep.
He will then sleep until 11:30pm when I wake him up for a feed, and then sleep until 5/6/7am (diff every day). He usually has no problem self settling if he wakes up during the night.
My main concern is whether I have become his prop for his bedtime? If not, then how can I help him fall asleep on his own?