(((Hugs))), you must be so exhausted. I'm sorry you aren't feeling well supported in this by your DH, that is very difficult. Have you read any of the BW books? Would he be willing to read even parts of them or some links from this site, so he at least understands what you are trying to do with her and why?
As for the solids, I think what you're feeding her is fine. I might drop the cereal and just go with fruits and veggies (like pear, sweet potato, and squash) for now, as cereals can be a bit harder to digest. And I would probably offer them in the morning or around lunch time just to make sure her tummy has a chance to digest them before bed. Did you notice an increase in the NWs when you started solids?
For teething meds, you can give acetaminophen (Tylenol or paracetamol) to see if that helps. Ibuprofen isn't recommended until LOs are at least 6mo. I've never used Orajel as there are some ingredients in it I don't like, but I've heard mixed reviews on its helpfulness.
As far as independent sleep goes, I think you can definitely work on it as she's not using the breast to fall asleep. The hard part is if you have to feed her while she's asleep, she's likely not getting restorative sleep at those points, because she's not in a deep sleep if she's actively sucking. Does she know how to replug the paci herself? I'd start working on that if you want to keep it and then start using shh/pat to get her to settle in your arms and in the crib. Here's a good link on that:
Pat-shush for babies under three months oldWhat do you think?