7 month old still waking for feed/comfort :(

[Tiredmum2012]

Hi,

I have a 7 month old, she has never been a good sleeper. She used to only wake 2/3 per night but then at 3/4 months started waking every hour. As I thought it was a growth spurt I fed her every time (my mistake, I know that now!) since then I have been trying to cut down her NW, but what I'm doing is just not working. She is now waking every 2 ish hours. I have tried to only feed her every 4 hours and put her to sleep with any NW in between. I'm also now trying not to pick her up unless its her feed time (she is shh/pat to sleep) but now she will need me to constantly pat her until her next feed, so I could be patting her for 2 hours at a go.

Her routine is roughly this:

7am WU E
8am breakfast
9.30 S anything between 1-1.5 hours
11am E
12 lunch
2pm S about 1.5hours but have to pat her at 45 mins
4pm E
6.15 start BT bath, massage, bottle, sleep by 7pm

I have just moved her to 2 naps this week as she was getting harder to settle for BT and her naps were getting shorter. She is bf and given 1 formula bottle at BT. At the moment I am only given her breakfast and lunch. Do you think adding dinner will help her sleep at night? I'm worried about adding dinner at the mo as she had bad constipation so just want to make sure that that is settled before adding more solids. Would it help by putting the catnap back into her day and moving her BT to 8-830?

Any advice on what I can do to help reduce the night waking? This has been going on for months so I know it's partly out of habit. I'm very tired and LO wakes up with bags under her eyes

Please help!

[PaulsMom]

Hugs for the nw's.  that sounds really rough and draining. 

Nw's can be caused by a number of things but one thing I've noticed about your routine is that her A times are on the low side.  A lot of 7 month olds are up for closer to 3 hrs.  Here's some info.  Average A times- BOOKMARK ME! I would recommend that you gradually increase her A by 10-15 min for 3 days and see how she does.  If she's still fighting naps and BT, then I'd increase again by 10-15 min. 

The number of nw's, could suggest discomfort.  What types of foods is she eating?  How much is she eating at each meal?  There are some foods that can help to ease constipation Constipation and Laxative Foods  I don't believe that dinner will help her STTN.  Given that she's constipated, I would try to resolve this issue and then add dinner with tried and true foods that you know will be gentle on her tummy (or else she may continue to wake). 

Do you think she's an independent sleeper?  It's good that you are using shh-pat.  I would start to just using shh-pat to calm her/ until she's drowsy and then let her fall asleep on her own.  I would start this with naps and then move to BT, and then in the MOTN.  this way, you won't have to pat for hrs on end! 

[Tiredmum2012]

Thank you for replying.

She is having weetabix with blueberries for breakfast. For lunch she has a mix of 2/3 steam veg or rice and lentils followed by a fruit yoghurt. I have been given her carrots also everyday as I want her to like eating them, but from the links you posted looks like the carrots and rice are not helping. I have given her mango and pear today so hopefully that will help.

As for sleeping.... For her first few months of life we used to rock her to sleep then hold her for every nap. It's taking a lot of work to get her to sleep in her cot. We started shh/pat around 5 months, so we no longer hold her to put her to sleep or while she is sleeping. I've also just got her to nap 1 hour + with help from the general sleep board.

I've been trying to reduce the patting for all her naps, sometimes she needs it and other times she'll fall asleep with just my hand on her chest. We are also trying the wean the swaddle, so at the moment we are swaddling with one arm out. I'm going to try the sleep bag tonight to let her use her arms for comforting.

I'm just struggling so much with the NWs and find it especially hard when all my friends babies the same age are sleeping through

I have noticed that she eats more in the day now that I don't feed her every time she wakes at night. Could it be that she's been filling up on milk at night?

[PaulsMom]

Hugs. 

At this age, I would keep the 4 milk feeds you have and make sure she's taking in enough at those times.  At night feed just every 4 hrs and try to settle at any other nw.  Solid food is still for fun at this age.  Are you giving water at meals?  I would keep trying different foods to see what is less constipating. 

I didn't ask last time about teeth.  Does she have any?  This is also prime time for teething, which can distrupt sleep as well.  If you think she's teething, then you can try a teething gel, or pain relief if you don't mind giving meds.

As for nw's, I think the key here is to try to address the possible discomforts as best you can while doing some sleep training so that you don't have to pat continually.  Try to stop patting once shes drowsy.  if she fusses, can you shh her to calm her down?  also, Is there anyone who can help you at night?  I've heard of couples who will alternate nights or one person will take the first half of the night and the other person takes the second half.  Either way, you hopefully can get more sleep which does make things better for you. 

[Tiredmum2012]

Hi Paulsmum

Yes I encourage her to drink water at meals, but she doesn't always want it. I'm now trying to give her water at a different time of the day if she refuses to take it with her meal.

I've been giving her laxative foods from the links you sent (thank you!) she been doing a poo every day for the last 3 days now.

Her NW's have gone back to every hour now I've been not picking her up outside feed times at time for a week now so I'm not sure if this is the point it gets worse, then starts to get better..

She doesn't have any teeth yet, so it could be teething, but this has been going on since she was 3 months so my gut feeling is that it habit?

My husband does offer to help at night but he has a high pressure jobs so I think it's not fair for him. I should really sleep in the day but get carried away with housework.

At this stage I would be happy with her waking up 2/3 times a night 

[PaulsMom]

sorry to hear that the nw's are continuing  .  Glad though that the constipation seems to be easing.  If things are going better food wise, you could consider introducing dinner with some tried and true foods.

When she wakes in the MOTN, how quickly are you going to her?  Is she crying full out or is it a mantra cry?  If it is her mantra cry, then I would leave her see if she can self settle (this is hard to do).  If her cries escalate to a proper cry, then go to her and shh-pat until she is calm but not asleep.

WRT to self settling / self soothing, have you fully weaned the swaddle?  If yes, does she have a comfort item?  If she doesn't have a comfort item, you might want to introduce a lovey or other item to help her with self soothing and settling. 

I would continue to use shh-pat as a means to soothe her when she wakes but make sure that you stop before she's asleep so that it doesn't become a prop. Unfortunately the next little while may be challenging as she learns to transition between sleep cycles but it will be worth it in the long run.  Hugs  . 

[Tiredmum2012]

I'm trying to wean the swaddle, at the mo we are swaddling with one arm out. I want to start using sleep bags, but I think it would be a big jump just to switch.

At her MOTN wakings, I try let her cry for a short time, but sometimes she wakes up screaming so I go to her straight away (she is still in our room, but sleeping in her cot)

I've been told by my doctor and osteopath that I should just stop feeding her at night. They both say she is strong and has good weight so she doesn't need to feed and night. So the longer I feed her at night the more she will wake. What do u think?

[PaulsMom]

Wrt swaddle weaning....  Here are a couple of suggestions....
https://www.halosleep.com/products/detail/27/100_cotton_sleepsack_swaddle/34/100_cotton_sleepsack_swaddle_-_prints/. These might be too small, but you can swaddle one arm in or have both out.  Unfortunately they only make them in a newborn and 3-6 mo size. 

For my son, we had to put him in a sleep sack but we would swaddle his lower half (arms out) with a large swaddling blanket or muslin.  He would break out of it but it would help to calm him down. 

Wrt feeding at night....  If she's eating well during the day, then likely she doesn't *need* the calories the way a newborn does.... But she may very well feel hunger in the MOTN, in the same way that we may wake and feel hungry.  So while I agree with your dr, weaning the nf's is up to you.   If you do wean, do one feed and see how things go for at least 4 nights and then drop the next feed.