Anyone combination/mixed fed?

[cuckoochick]

Ok, has anybody combination fed?

I'm finding BFing tough this time around despite BFing C for 18mos. We couldn't get her to take a bottle until the week before I went back to work when C was 10mos so didn't have the option anyway.

Finding things tough because of some issues we've got with our 4wk old (possible reflux/colic/wind/goodness knows what!) and to be honest I'm exhausted and having a toddler to deal with who doesn't always cope well with me being tied to a sofa for ages BFing.

Hv suggested I introduce some formula for 1/2 feeds per day so that I could get a break?! I don't really know how I feel about this but am certainly not really enjoying BFing at the moment especially in the evenings as for the past few nights G has screamed while nursing. I am worried about whether formula might make our problems worse but the way I'm feeling I need to make some changes because I feel like I'm on the precipice of PND.

Pumping isn't really the option right now as I just don't feel up to it. So any thoughts? Is it a good idea? Should I just try to ride it out? Is introducing formula likely to make things worse? As you can see I am so conflicted.

Thanks

[Fiver]

I mixed fed DS from around 4m-12m when he stopped feeding.  I offered the breast at each feed and then gave a top up of formula afterwards.  In hindsight, I wish I'd gone along to a BF support group who had a fully trained breastfeeding counsellor to get things ironed out there rather than listening to DS's paed and introducing formula as I feel a lot of our issues could've been sorted out earlier if I'd just picked myself up and gone to a group for qualified advice

Obviously the choice is yours, though, and no one is going to judge you for your decision

[cuckoochick]

The thing is her weight gain is fab, she's having plenty of wet and dirty nappies (when the gaviscon isn't constipating her). I guess it's just the screaming and fussiness in the evening that is what I'm finding hard plus balancing all of the stuff with C. I just keep worrying if it's related to feeding and worrying she's starving (due to low milk supply in the evening) although I have tons of milk in the day. I am just constantly questioning myself.

I'm going to trial going dairy-free. Have been meaning to but needed to do it when I had planned a week's worth of meals. I am trying to set myself goals of a week at a time because I don't want to give up BFing entirely. I just thought it would be loads easier this time around. It's made harder by the fact that she will not feed while I'm lying down in bed at night. I'm not being rational because I'm so tired I guess.

[Shiv52]

Hugs Nic xx

I found with both mine things improved greatly at 6 weeks. If you think there is any dairy issues/reflux issues I'd be really wary of introducting formula just because it really could make things worse.

How long is G feeding for?  I can't really see how the HV thinks doing a few bottles feeds will give you a break?  Unless you have other people there to do the feeds for you?  Because you still have to make up the feed and sit there while she feeds so its still going to be boring for C?   And then all the supply issues as to keep up supply at this early stage you'd need to be pumping too. Sorry for sounding like a downer but that what my HV said to me and it just seemed like really hard work.  Unless you could do a bottle feed for DF so you can go to bed early and leave DH to do it so you could have from 7/8 to 3am ish uninterrupted?

In the evenings I would feed and then let DH batter on settling her. I was really conscious of not getting into hour upon hour long feeding sessions with DD2 because of having DD1. My MW said after 4 weeks after a half hour feed really she will have had enough so unless she was really really actively feeding I ended the feeds and persevered with the dummy.

I think the evening fussiness is just that. Not related to milk supply IYKWIM?  Maybe OT?  How is she sleeping in the day?  Are you getting out much with C? 

Hugs hugs hugs. Hang in there. It will get easier xx.

[cuckoochick]

We're off out but will be back to post later

[ZacsMumme]

Hugs sweetie. I totally get why you think it may help.
I just want to also point out that IF (and I know it's an if now) she is intolerant, or has gut issues formula will make this much worse. It will also discount your dairy free BF if you were to try it. Formula is more heavy on the gut, and harder to digest. Milk proteins are filtered much more through breast milk than in formula too.

Also IF (another I know just wanting to let you know) there is reflux. Formula is typically worse coming up and stays in the tummy longer. Breast milk has an alkaline effect.

So, I'm not saying don't...but do consider these and depending on what you feel the problem is go from there. Maybe see if you are to go dairy free and you want formula as an option see if you can get access to hyper allergenic milk. I personally wouldn't give soy milk to a NB

[anna*]

Won't you still be tied to the sofa while you're bottle feeding? Or is the theory that they take milk from a bottle faster?

[Shiv52]

Won't you still be tied to the sofa while you're bottle feeding? Or is the theory that they take milk from a bottle faster?

That's what I was thinking too. Plus you'd need to use a newborn teat so bottle preference doesn't develop if Nicola wants to keep up BFing.

[cuckoochick]

Anna I guess the bottle feeding rationale would be that DH could do some feeds. I think if we were to introduce a bottle of formula it would be to replace a BF if that makes sense so maybe one around teatime and the midnightish feed so that I would go to bed and get some sleep and DH do that feed. My SIL combination fed her twins from day 1 by BFing in the day and bottle feeding formula in the evening and throughout the night. Other than her I don't know anyone else who has done combination feeding. Most people seem to be all or nothing if that makes sense.

So our days are actually pretty good. G sleeps in the sling for all naps as I'm not even going there work trying to settle her in her basket. I'm not recording our days EASY because I can't let my mind go there with analysing and logging.

Generally though she is feeding every 2.5-3hrs in the day. Often I am waking her at 3hrs in the afternoon as she'd definitely sleep longer if I let her. So naps are at least 1.5-2hrs.
The end of the day can get a bit hairy with getting everyone fed at dinner time so sometimes she can be OT by BT but she's fussy regardless of that at BT. The other day we'd a perfect day of naps and her last nap was a 2hr nap which she woke from at 6pm and was hungry. She had a feed and a bath by 6:45 and was then getting ready for bed when the screaming/feeding cycle started. This then lasted for 2.5hrs or thereabouts when she finally fell asleep at 9:30pm but was then up at midnight. Yesterday she didn't nap well late afternoon as was cluster feeding and did a short 30min nap but then went to sleep after only an hour and a half of fussing and screaming.

At night she does a first stretch of about 4-5hrs which is good I know and then was doing between 3-4hrs between NFs again good I know but now she's waking every 2hrs and so by the time I've got her back into bed I'm hardly shutting my eyes. This has been for the last week now. It's the early hours of the morning where she's uncomfortable as well she's writhing around I just cannot sleep. So yes while I know formula might not be the magic answer and I'm really not thinking it would be, I'm just exploring it as a possibility for a sanity saver. I find these screaming nursing sessions in the evening really distressing.

I guess it's just confusing how she feeds every 2.5hrs-3hrs in the day and would go longer if I let her to then feeding every 2hrs at night. If I could cosleep with her to get more sleep I would but she's so windy I can't plus she won't feed lying down in bed.

Thanks ladies for your thoughts.

[Shiv52]

Hugs Nicola xx

I think doing a bottle feed for that midnight feed would be a good idea. I used to go bed early and DH would bring R to me and I'd DF in bed. Shame G won't feed lying down as it was a lifesaver for me.

I think though the first port of call would be to get the reflux sorted though. Squirmy evenings and unable to feed lying down and wind annoying her scream uncontrolled reflux or MPI to me. You've stopped the gaviscon haven't you? When are seeing the GP again? 

[cuckoochick]

Yes I stopped the gaviscon because it wasn't actually stopping her vomiting or hiccupping and then we had constipation causing discomfort too. She was lying there pumping all night and writhing around and honestly in some ways it was worse. All the HV told me to do was to give her cooled, boiled water but then was advised by LLL not to do that under any circumstances.

The HV is coming tomorrow but I'm hoping to get to see the GP I want to see sometime this week. She works part-time and different days every week is v popular so it's not easy to get to see her.

To be honest, BT is the worst. She's not really a screamer at any other time of the day. It's just stressful for us all as by this point I am done and it's making C escalate before BT too and so we're often ending up with 2 of them screaming and then me on the inside too!

[Hedgehog17]

Hugs Nicola 

DS was older (5.5mo) when I started combination feeding, and my own supply dried up pretty fast so he ended up fully on formula by 6.5mo. It was hydrolized protein formula (Pepti 1) as he couldn't have regular due to MPI & reflux.

I'd try going dairy free first, see if you can get the reflux under control, then she'll rest better and so will you 

[Fiver]

DD was like that in the evenings for a good few weeks after delivery.  We started out by doing the BT routine and trying to get her into bed and then if that didn't work then just taking her back downstairs (either in or out of the sling) and cuddling/feeding until she dropped off.  No, it's not very BW, but she's still really new and wants and needs to be near someone.

Could your DH take her for a bit while you put C to bed and spend a bit of alone time with her to give you a bit of a break?  Or is he not around at that time?

[cuckoochick]

Amanda I'm not bothered about creating any props at this point I'll do anything. DH is around most evenings so we could try that. When we've tried to do both together, C gets v stressed. They do have a bath together and on Tuesdays I've been doing both which has been hard.  Thanks

[Fiver]

Honestly, I found just chilling out about it all and doing whatever was necessary was liberating and meant that I could be a lot more relaxed in my parenting (for both of them).  This will get easier